I'm Going To Overthrow Science! This Villainy Has Gone On For Far Too Long!

[Seil]

Seriously science? You've been there for years now. Years. And what have you given us? All of these laws - the laws of motion, the laws of genetics, the laws of gravity. I have had enough! I call you out, Science! I call you out in all your gaudy livery! Clothed in your naked villainy, you stride forth to deny man his rights!

The right to fly is denied us by you! The right to be transforming robots is denied by you! I say that man should have these rights! I say that we should spread our wings and be free of weight ratios and gravity. I say we should shift our mass and be free of the laws of logic and robotics!

You have done nothing but hold us back from our deepest desires! You ground us and steal away our ambition! I will show you for the tyrant that you are, and take you from your throne! I will steal your crown! I will rule your disciples! I will be the new God of the laws of Earth and nature.

Rise up, my subjects! What has science taken from you?

Fenris said I could.

[Premmy]

My pointy-ass glasses

[Seil]

I appoint thee the Duke Of Ophthalmology!

[Amake]

Science can be explained by magic. Magic encompasses science and makes it look small and restricting in comparison. Why would we need a thing like science to make sense of the world when it doesn't even allow for the existence of something greater than itself? All it does is make the world simpler and smaller so the small and frightened can feel better about themselves.

My best friend can fly, in defiance of science. I don't really have a problem with science, because it has never been able to hold me down. But I support this thread as it can spread awareness of the faults of science, and let everyone fly with their own wings.

[Rejected Again]

Science took my superpowers!

No wait that was my psychologist...

[Professor Smarmiarty]

Already done http://nuklearforums.com/showthread.php?t=37839

[Azisien]

Yea I gotta say that was what I immediately thought of when I saw this thread.

Except this thread is more go-lucky vagueness attacks on science using ???? whereas Smarty had direct attacks on science using mind-bending (re: awful) logic.

[Amake]

It was pretty weird there when Smarty went every which way to refute my scientific claims like I was some kind of scientist. I thought that was more about contradicting everything at any cost, whereas this is a declaration of war on science, kind of like the war on drugs and the war on terror, you know, those ridiculous things.

On reflection, it's been said the purpose of war is to destroy your enemy's ability to make war. Does science make war? No? That means we've already won.

[Krylo]

Does science make war? No? That means we've already won.

BEHOLD! THE POWER OF SCIENCE! (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=a_PTHAMqL-g)

[Seil]

BEHOLD! THE POWER OF SCIENCE!

What hath science wrought?!

[Amake]

Now now, science doesn't turn cities into radioactive craters, people turn cities into radioactive craters.

But seriously, that's not making war, that's making war worse. Science itself, like most abstract concepts, doesn't commit acts of war.

Also lol, I just happened to come across this (http://overcompensating.com/posts/20051017.html) on my Overcompensating archive trawl.

[Geminex]

Science is in danger! Somebody, activate the Sithdarth signal!

[Green Spanner]

But what is science? (http://weebls-stuff.com/toons/science/)

(warning: flashing images)

[Odjn]

Viva la science!

[Amake]

A whitecoat! Get 'im!

*fitches and torqueporks*

[Professor Smarmiarty]

I think this thread is flawed from the outset. Nobody *does* science anymore, everyone just sits in rooms and pontificates *about* science. The threat has neutralised itself.

[Satan's Onion]

Doesn't that arguably make it more of a threat? That way, science can't even be detected until it insinuates itself into your very mind--and by then, of course, it's too late.

[Professor Smarmiarty]

I hadn't considered that angle. I shall need to ponder.

[Geminex]

Come on, people. What's the worst thing that science can do? Asides from destroying your dreams, destroying your world, and probably destroying everything, ever?

[Amake]

The Nazis used science you know. Quite a lot of it.

[Geminex]

Oh yeah? Well, Jesus was a scientist!
He totally was. He found a way to circumvent preservation of mass and energy.

[Amake]

Nuh-uh! You have to submit data to peer review and stuff to be a scientist. Jesus did it the hardcore way: With magic.

[Geminex]

Why do you hate jesus?
Also, why do you hate Atomic Robo. Even if Jesus wasn't a scientist, Atomic Robo is. He's such a scientist. He's, like, a double scientist. With a side order of badass. Heh, he could totally kick you ass. And Garfunkle's as well! And Simon's!
So who are you to question Atomic Robo-Jesus?

[A Zarkin' Frood]

Being against science is like being against knowledge. Literally.
Knowledge in itself is pretty useless. But if you're smart enough to use that knowledge you can do all kindsa things. Cool things, and not so cool things.
That being said: Science took my faith in humanity.

[Professor Smarmiarty]

Being against science is like being against knowledge. Literally.

Generally science refers to the empirical method and the scientific thought construct. So you can be against it and be fore knowledge.

Actually are you claiming that all subjects were aren't science aren't knowledge?

[A Zarkin' Frood]

Maybe I was just referring to the word's latin roots.
Science (from the Latin (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Latin) scientia, meaning "knowledge")

[Professor Smarmiarty]

Latin is the language of barbarians.
And if we're going to play that game science really means "to dissect things"

[Geminex]

Hey, the literal translation of "nuclear" is, I believe "nut-based" (from "nux"), but it can still screw you over pretty badly. Or help you, depending on your use of it.

[Professor Smarmiarty]

That cause it refers to the center of an atom- the nut if you will.

[Geminex]

Yeah, I'm aware of that. But your point seemed to be that science sucks because literally translated, its name is of inferior quality. Whereas I pointed out that the area of science with the least impressive name, is one of the most impressive (read: capable of causing the biggest explosions) areas to exist.

Thus, impressiveness of name is antiproportional to awesomeness of discipline, and thus, by pointing out that science means "to dissect" you have supported our point that science is cool.

And there's no fallacy inherent in that train of logic AT ALL so don't even bother looking for one.

[Professor Smarmiarty]

No I was complaining about using the original meaning of words in response to IG. Learn to keep up.

[krogothwolf]

I always thought science was just a fancy word to say "allow us to design more destructive weapons!"

[The Artist Formerly Known as Hawk]

Tesla would like a word with you all (http://www.badassoftheweek.com/tesla.html).

[Professor Smarmiarty]

Tesla championed AC current- ie the pussies current.

[Krylo]

Tesla built a death ray. (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Teleforce)

No one who builds a death ray can ever be equated to a pussy.

[Magic_Marker]

I think we're advoiding the real question here.

If science solves all out problems, then why aren't I rich?

[krogothwolf]

I think we're advoiding the real question here.

If science solves all out problems, then why aren't I rich?

Cause you ugly!

[The Artist Formerly Known as Hawk]

Tesla championed AC current- ie the pussies current.

AC kills you quicker. DC is the pussies current. Nobody wanted AC in their homes because it was too dangerous and extreme for them to handle it. That's why Telsa championed it; because he didn't give a fuck.

And along with his death rays and wireless electricity (in uber-dangerous AC format, natch) he also built a palm sized earthquake machine. The man clearly was a supervillain and wanted to murder everyone with science.

I think we're advoiding the real question here.

If science solves all out problems, then why aren't I rich?

It can. Money is largely digital these days, all you need to do is hack the banks and type in some digits and BAM!, instant quadrillionaire.

[Seil]

What did science change? Science changed us! We used to live in caves, all fit and natural, clubbing our food to death! Cracking open lettuce heads and peppers for sabertooth salad.

Now look at us! Because of science, we genetically alter our food! We're able to herd our sabertooth tigers into death machines! Science has made us fat and lazy! Fat and lazy! Well I say no more! We must attack now!

[Magic_Marker]

It can. Money is largely digital these days, all you need to do is hack the banks and type in some digits and BAM!, instant quadrillionaire.

brb gettin' hooker monies.

[Azisien]

I dunno, I guess we could attack now, but why not tomorrow? I'm tired.

[The Artist Formerly Known as Hawk]

I'm not fat, and I'm ok with being lazy. You want to go live in a cave and club food to death and eat it raw (creating fire is science), then go right ahead. Nobody's stopping you.

Go on, go. Have fun with that.

[Professor Smarmiarty]

AC kills you quicker. DC is the pussies current. Nobody wanted AC in their homes because it was too dangerous and extreme for them to handle it. That's why Telsa championed it; because he didn't give a fuck.


But you can't power anything really deadly with it. Sure it'll kill you by itself better but DC opens up far more exciting ways to murder people.

[krogothwolf]

You know when it was a great time, the time before real science when you could go around and pillage the land, steal women and put people to death for looking at you funny. Yeah, its to bad science ruined that eh.

[bluestarultor]

What did science change? Science changed us! We used to live in caves, all fit and natural, clubbing our food to death! Cracking open lettuce heads and peppers for sabertooth salad.

Now look at us! Because of science, we genetically alter our food! We're able to herd our sabertooth tigers into death machines! Science has made us fat and lazy! Fat and lazy! Well I say no more! We must attack now!

I want a sabertoothed tiger now. I would keep him and name him Smiley. You know, because he'd be a smilodon.

Oh, crap!

[Professor Smarmiarty]

I'm not fat, and I'm ok with being lazy. You want to go live in a cave and club food to death and eat it raw (creating fire is science), then go right ahead. Nobody's stopping you.

Go on, go. Have fun with that.

And yet people knew how to make fire loong before they studied it scientifically. You don't need science to make fire- you are confusing rules of the universe with the systematic study of these rules.

[Magic_Marker]

In fact, you can make entire museums (http://creationmuseum.org/)without any science at all!

Who needs science? Not me. *hrumpf*

[krogothwolf]

In fact, you can make entire museums (http://creationmuseum.org/)without any science at all!

Who needs science? Not me. *hrumpf*

That's because you're a Warlock!

Man, I want to go on a witch hunt!

[Sithdarth]

You people do realize that sufficiently advanced science is indistinguishable from magic. Which means that while science may keep us down today the science of the future will liberate us from the tyranny of the science of today. We shouldn't be making war with science we should be helping it progress into the glorious promised realm of Science Fiction where the tyrannical rule of modern day science has ended.

[Magic_Marker]

http://images1.wikia.nocookie.net/__cb20080519040210/warhammer40k/images/d/d0/Emperor40K.jpg
Pictured: Sithdarth in the future

[krogothwolf]

Na, sith is Horushttp://wh40k.lexicanum.com/mediawiki/images/7/75/Horus2.jpg

[Seil]

You people do realize that sufficiently advanced science is indistinguishable from magic. Which means that while science may keep us down today the science of the future will liberate us from the tyranny of the science of today. We shouldn't be making war with science we should be helping it progress into the glorious promised realm of Science Fiction where the tyrannical rule of modern day science has ended.

How Machiavellian of you.

[Si Civa]

Because of science you have to pay electric bill. And because government likes science part of your taxes goes to them and it rises little bit your tax rate (and the science money goes to military as they develop new bombs, you know).

It can be proven by marxist way that science is just an hoax made by capitalists to keep the poor down by making them pay more and more bills.

[Professor Smarmiarty]

The intellegensia are friends to the proletariat. Take your filthy imperialist lies elsewhere.

[Seil]

I'm not fat, and I'm ok with being lazy. You want to go live in a cave and club food to death and eat it raw (creating fire is science), then go right ahead. Nobody's stopping you.

Go on, go. Have fun with that.

You think we'd call on Science? Pffft. We'd take fire from the Volcano Gods.

[PyrosNine]

You think we'd call on Science? Pffft. We'd take fire from the Volcano Gods.

I'll need 30 goats grilled medium rare on the nearest volcano, 630 bottles of assorted fruit juice, and 339 crude handpaintings of arson.

And to seal the deal, I'll need a sacrifice of a virgin daughter on the summer solstice. Every year. No exceptions, or late sacrifices, or "But Pyros! Without science, we can't figure out when the summer solstice is!"

But it's a great deal, all the fire you want, even on nights and weekends! It even roams!

If there's one thing science has taken from me, is y'know, a bunch of flammable worshipers calling on me for a Friday night BBQ, wearing nothing but their birthday suits and the blood of a fresh kill.

[Flarecobra]

*Thwacks Pyros over the head with a large tuna* Go fetch kitty. *Throws it a long ways away*

And just go to Hawaii. One can get fire from Pele for a spring of mint tied around a container of gin.

[PyrosNine]

Hey! I didn't ask for one oversized fish beaten and to go! But I'll take it!

[Ecks]

I put on my robe and wizard hat...

and cast FIR 3 until everything burns. There. No more science.

[ThatPoorMessenger]

There goes my courses for next year, I'll study magic. Now, I need to make some sacrifises, does anyone find someone near them annoying?
Also, Seil, where would we be without laws? We need them, or lawyers might start spreading that concentrated level of limitation they hold.

[Professor Smarmiarty]

Laws are designed to oppress my prol brethren. They are arbitrary creations forced on us by tyrannical overclasses.

[ThatPoorMessenger]

Laws are designed to oppress my prol brethren. They are arbitrary creations forced on us by tyrannical overclasses.Marxists have gotten back out? :raise:

[Professor Smarmiarty]

No, you've entered into their cage

[ThatPoorMessenger]

No, you've entered into their cage*Throws money away* Hello, brothers and sisters of the Red Star! I'm totally not a capitalist.

[Ecks]

If one does not have monies to begin with... how does one continue being capitalist?

[ThatPoorMessenger]

If one does not have monies to begin with... how does one continue being capitalist?That's kind of the point in getting rid of it. I don't like the Gulag camps.