Flaming Dire Guitar

[Hanuman]

Stage 1
http://img534.imageshack.us/img534/5434/direflail.jpg

Stage 2
http://img26.imageshack.us/img26/1559/direflail2.jpg

Stage 3
http://img201.imageshack.us/img201/8897/direflail3.jpg


Thoughts?

[Ryanderman]

From the positioning of the flail on the body of the guitar, I think you'd need a lot more kevlar, which could really ruin the acoustics. How much are you willing to compromise on musical quality for ass kicking durability?

[Hanuman]

Well I was thinking 2mm as a spacer, para-aramids aren't really good for protection AGAINST fire, that's meta-aramids. The kevlar would basically be a fireproof insulator from the wood, allowing the wood to breathe as it absorbs a bit of the heat (also insulating the heat) from the aluminum tape which is also reflecting and conducting the heat and dispersing it quickly. Really this is just something I thought NPF would enjoy, I'm thinking of modding a guitar with just spokes with fire coming out, seems way more practical.

[Ryanderman]

Oh absolutely. It's great.

[Shin Amakiir]

God dammit Lev.

[krogothwolf]

You would have balancing issues with it in general.

[Aldurin]

Do this, make it happen, or I will hunt you down and force you to do it.

[Loyal]

What... is the flail supposed to be for? It seems it would be hard to rock out without smashing the guitar (or yourself) to pieces, protection from fire or no.

[Professor Smarmiarty]

Surely the correct approach is two guitar attached by chain, both on fire. Find way to play both at once.

[Archbio]

Everybody knows that the proper use of a guitar as a weapon is as an axe.

[Bard The 5th LW]

Everybody knows that the proper use of a guitar as a weapon is as an axe.
.

[A Zarkin' Frood]

No! The weapons guitars and all other musical instruments are modeled on are peace and love. If you're gonna set 'em on fire you'd better be Jimi Hendrix or another guy with enough legendary musicianship Karma to get away with it. Because if you burn music or musical instruments you burn peace and love.

[Revising Ocelot]

I'm getting a distinct swordchucks impression here...

[Professor Smarmiarty]

No! The weapons guitars and all other musical instruments are modeled on are peace and love. If you're gonna set 'em on fire you'd better be Jimi Hendrix or another guy with enough legendary musicianship Karma to get away with it. Because if you burn music or musical instruments you burn peace and love.

M[ostly you are just burning your penis though.

[A Zarkin' Frood]

Well, yes. And that's stupid.

EDIT: Of course you can't tell whether burning your penis is strictly a bad thing or if it is just made out to be that because human males are so obsessed with their cocks, going as far as calling them their "manhood". Sure it's the ding-dong they put in the hoo-ha. But if a man loses his trouser snake does that make him any less of a man? Also: Males who perceive their schlongs as small sometimes don't see themselves as men. Don't you think that the whole concept of manhood is rather weak if it relies solely on dicks?

[Kyanbu The Legend]

I'd say increase the length of the chains to about 12in. each (maybe 16 in. for the rear chain).

It's not awesome unless it's on fire somehow huh NPF?

[Magus]

Well, yes. And that's stupid.

EDIT: Of course you can't tell whether burning your penis is strictly a bad thing or if it is just made out to be that because human males are so obsessed with their cocks, going as far as calling them their "manhood". Sure it's the ding-dong they put in the hoo-ha. But if a man loses his trouser snake does that make him any less of a man? Also: Males who perceive their schlongs as small sometimes don't see themselves as men. Don't you think that the whole concept of manhood is rather weak if it relies solely on dicks?

Go ask some women if they would consider their womanhood diminished by burning their breasts/clitorises, you will get your answer to these philosophical quandaries, which requires thought and deep understanding of the human psyche.

Men are too busy popping Viagra and working penis pumps to think about shit like that.

But then again the Aztecs thought it was totally cool to stick spikes through their dicks so who knows?

EDIT: Also concept of manhood relies on big balls, too. And sports cars. And guns. We need these for our manhoods.

[Krylo]

But if a man loses his trouser snake does that make him any less of a man?
Yes.
Also concept of manhood relies on big balls, too.Only metaphorically. And sports cars. And guns. We need these for our manhoods.No.

Those are things you get if your manhood isn't good enough.

They're accessories.

[PyrosNine]

Firstly, the flail parts need to be perpendicular to the guitar parts, so by twisting your body during the guitar solo, you swing death.

Secondly, the guitar needs to be a flying V.

Thirdly, and most importantly, the entire guitar has to be on fire.

Though not neccesary, the song played should be "Freebird" because "Through the fire and flames" would seem like a terrible pun.

[Flarecobra]

Sounds like a perfectly sane idea there Pyros.

[PyrosNine]

Good thing I left out the need for hotpants and the added napalm dispenser, huh?

[Magus]

I think the guitar needs a flamethrower like the one from Once Upon a Time in Mexico.

[Kyanbu The Legend]

Sounds like a perfectly sane idea there Pyros.

Yes very sane. Absolutely nothing wrong or deadly about it.

*starts blasting Heavy Metal Rock*

[Flarecobra]

No more then some of the pyrotechnics at some other rock shows.

[synkr0nized]

...

What...


So I guess I'm in the minority here in thinking that this is stupid?

[Loyal]

I'm too busy thinking "there is nothing you can do to make this safe and entertaining" to think "this is stupid".

[Flarecobra]

I'm kinda in both.

[Krylo]

...

What...


So I guess I'm in the minority here in thinking that this is stupid?

Nope.

[TDK]

Firstly, the flail parts need to be perpendicular to the guitar parts, so by twisting your body during the guitar solo, you swing death.

Secondly, the guitar needs to be a flying V.

Thirdly, and most importantly, the entire guitar has to be on fire.

Though not neccesary, the song played should be "Freebird" because "Through the fire and flames" would seem like a terrible pun.

Maybe we shouldn't be getting fire-safety advice from a guy with "pyro" in his name.

[Flarecobra]

Or we just do the exact opposite.

[Loyal]

I'm not entirely sure you're qualified to give advice either, Flare.

[Flarecobra]

Did I ever say I was?

[Loyal]

"Do the opposite of what he says" sounds like advice to me!

[Kyanbu The Legend]

...

What...


So I guess I'm in the minority here in thinking that this is stupid?

This is just another day to me. I'm strangely unaffected by crazy shit like this.

I guess you could say I'm neutral about this. Not against, not with it either.

[Flarecobra]

"Do the opposite of what he says" sounds like advice to me!

At least I advocate safe use of fire.

[Melfice]

Lev could be kind of a jerk, but he had his heart in the right place.
He'll be missed.

... is what I would be writing if he pulled through with this.
What the hell, Lev.

What the hell.

[phil_]

See, from anyone else, this would be totally stupid. But this is the man who constructed and can wield flaming sword-chucks. I say that if anyone can add fire and impractical weaponry to a guitar, it's Lev.

[Loyal]

Just because you can do something doesn't mean you can get away with it. I don't think he's given a live show yet, has he? Just building and demonstrations and stuff.

[Melfice]

See, from anyone else, this would be totally stupid. But this is the man who constructed and can wield flaming sword-chucks. I say that if anyone can add fire and impractical weaponry to a guitar, it's Lev.

That's like driving a car without a steering wheel.
Sure, it'll go right two, three, four times.

And then you change your Robin Reliant for a Formula One car and try the same thing.

See what I mean?

[phil_]

Just because you can do something doesn't mean you can get away with it. I don't think he's given a live show yet, has he? Just building and demonstrations and stuff.Just demonstrating a flaming sword swinging around one's head on a chain consists of swinging a flaming sword around one's head on a chain.

[Krylo]

It's not dumb because of the danger.

It's dumb because attaching a pair of flails to a guitar and setting them on fire is dumb. It'd make it harder to hold, harder to play, and any maneuver that is going to make the flails do anything cool is going to make it impossible to play. All the flaming flails are going to do is make it impossible to do the various trick playing shit (over the back, bending backwards, jumping around, etc.) that looks cool with a normal guitar.

At most you might make sliding it around your body on the strap look a little cooler as a trade off for being able to do nothing else but play the guitar very still with a pair of flaming testicles hanging off of it.

[Hanuman]

No! The weapons guitars and all other musical instruments are modeled on are peace and love. If you're gonna set 'em on fire you'd better be Jimi Hendrix or another guy with enough legendary musicianship Karma to get away with it. Because if you burn music or musical instruments you burn peace and love.
Truth, *humbly strums his 5 variations of major and minor scales and inter-scale transitions*
I'd probably not be good enough to do it justice for 5 years.

Also, everyone is right, but I figured no one would care due to the SSJTRIGUNTOPHATREXASAURUSFLYINGLASERGALLEONs, and stuff.

Oh, yeah, swordchucks are coming. I've spent fucking 40-60 hours on getting my camera to work and every time I get within an inch of it working it douches me back out of it.
Right now I'm getting it to do a 10 hour conversion session from it's .mt2s AND .mt2s.modd files (2 types for 1 video file) into .mp2 and hopefully either vdubmod or vegaspro will be able to use the mp2 it's going to be converted into.