Movin' out

[Bob The Mercenary]

So a friend and I have done some math and figured we have enough income to finally move out of our parents' houses. I've obviously never done this before and I know a lot of you have had experience owning your own place. We've done some looking and have found a few places with two bedrooms that come in at around $1000/month and aren't too far from the interstate. The neighborhoods are far from seedy too.

I'm just looking for some advice as to how to proceed with this. Because my car will finally be paid off and I now effectively have two jobs and a side job, I'll be able to pay my share of the rent and still have plenty left over for groceries and other things. If I want to save a little more I also have the option of taking the bus to work. But, I still want to be prepared for the unexpected.

[Seil]

Here's my advice: don't. Remember when I moved out, and made a thread about what to do in a new area and stuff like that? Well, I had moved out with a friend. He had been my friend since high school. We hung out a whole bunch, we talked a bunch. Then we moved in together. Six months later, we moved out.

We're not friends anymore.

Someone is different when you're living with them, and they will grate on your nerves because of different living styles. I don't think it's a good idea.

[Bob The Mercenary]

That's the same thing everyone keeps telling me. But, the benefits of living with a friend that I have full knowledge of his pros and cons trumps living with my parents. At least to me. I'm willing to give it a shot for a year. That's kind of the reason we're looking for a two bedroom, so we both have some privacy and so I have a door to slam if we get pissed at each other.

What exactly made you guys grow apart, if you don't mind me asking?

[pochercoaster]

Hey, congrats on finding your own place! $500 a month isn't bad.

1. After your bills always make sure to save a portion of your income, preferably at least 10% (I save 8%). Your savings will help you out in emergencies. DO NOT spend your savings on frivolous things... they're there for when your car breaks down and stuff like that. Savings are a necessity!

2. Buy furniture second hand, unless it has a lot of material cause you don't want to get be bugs or anything nasty. I went to Goodwill and got a coffee table for $5, a shelf for $15 and a kitchen table for $10. The table was slightly ugly so I covered it with a table cloth and then it didn't look so bad.

Also, if you need to buy a mattress then check the Salvation Army because brand new defective mattresses are donated there. There's usually barely anything wrong with them, like the fabric is mismatched or something, so you can snag yourself a perfectly fine mattress for less than $200.

Second hand dishes are also perfectly acceptable and much cheaper than new ones. Just wash them thoroughly! Sometimes you can find pretty good pots and pans too.

3. Write a budget and stick to it. Don't forget to budget in entertainment since if you're a video game or movie junkie that can get expensive fast! Avoid fast food too because it's quite costly if you eat it all the time.

Edit: Personally, moving out on my own was one of the best decisions I've made in the last 3 years. However, I didn't move out with a friend.

While I was working two jobs to save up for my apartment, EVERYONE told me I wouldn't be able to do it, I was in over my head, I was too young, etc. etc.

Fuck 'em.

I am so much happier now that I'm a proper adult with responsibilities and control over decisions that affect my life.

Unless your friend has a severe personality defect I would suspect rooming together would be okay AS LONG as you make sure you each get your privacy & have certain rules set out in regards to household management. Like, "don't be a slob," "don't play music really loudly at 6am," etc. My roommate (I ended up moving into another apartment) and I take turns cleaning the bathroom every weekend, and we also take turns buying things like paper towel and milk. Being upfront about such rules can go a long way towards reducing conflict.

[rpgdemon]

Be careful about used furniture: Bedbugs are on the rise these days.

[Specterbane]

pocheros put some great advice up there. Having lived with room mates in the past I could add a few things.

Go ahead and label your food. I know it seems like it'd be cool to go in together and split the cost of all the food, but it's something that'll grate on you when you were hankering for the block of cheese you bought and he finished it off. But paper towels and toilet paper (things you do share) should be traded off as to who buys them.

Having your own space is essential, the two bed rooms are a great call. As a part of that respect your room mate's privacy and try to be noticeable about when they'd like to be left alone or not. It really goes a long way to reduce conflict if you try to respect the other person and see problems from their perspective.

If you're going to split chores, make sure it's agreed upon for who does what when. BUT! Don't hold them to it all the time, if something needs done then you do it if you can because they could be having a hugely busy week. Going the extra mile on your own is a good way to be a great room mate, just don't complain about it unless you're obviously joking.

Just to reiterate: Budget and Savings are crucial, in fact you should put your savings for things in your monthly budget; setting it aside a little at a time to accumulate into an emergency fund.

This is going to be an adjustment for you and your new room mate. Endure the hard parts and be patient about getting to know each other as room mates not just as friends. It will be different, but this is a make or break situation for a lot of people.

Good luck to you, I've been there before and I'm going there again soon (moving out of my parent's). It's a big change, but it really is worth it once pull it off.

[Nique]

Watch out for utility bills.meaning try not to leave faucets running or lights on (as young men are wont to do), stuff like that.

I'll echo saving 8-10% of your income. 'Pay yourself first' as they say - and that doesn't mean spending the money on video games. If you're smart you'll eventually have thousands of dollars to fall back on in case of emergencies.

[Seil]

What exactly made you guys grow apart, if you don't mind me asking?

Let's leave it at lack of communication.

We didn't say when we were mad about something until the breaking point.

[phil_]

Living with twin. Can't help. Suggest you move in with your twin.

[Nique]

Living with twin. Can't help. Suggest you move in with your twin.


Actually I would love to hear about this cause if I had to live with my brother I think I'd go nuts.

[pochercoaster]

Something else I forgot: Don't use a credit card. Yeah, it's a piece of advice everyone gives, but no one follows. This is why savings are so important! There's no sense in having a credit card unless you use it to purchase things you can't purchase any other way. NEVER use a credit card for an emergency unless you're positive you can pay it off with your next couple paycheques and you absolutely need it. Following this rule I have yet to carry a balance on my credit card and I've had it for nearly a year.

Edit: Oh yeah, and it's definitely easier to not share groceries. Me and my other 2 roomies even ended up buying our own margarine containers because one of us them gets crumbs in it and the other one likes "light" margarine. I guess we're picky but we prefer it this way. >_>

[shiney]

Yeah communicate. You're going to get so pissed in the first 4-5 months, particularly if one of you is a momma's boy who barely lifted a finger around the house and the other one has had a share of responsibility. That's what I ended up with when I lived with my friend -- lazy ass slob, never helped do a damn thing (maybe the dishes once every 5 months or so) and instead of getting on his case about it I just stifled it.

It's not worth it. Either lrn2communicate or don't rent with your friend.

[Magus]

Man, two bedrooms? Lame. The only reason to move in with a friend is to rent a single room for 250 a month, sleep head to toe on a tiny futon, and wash your socks in the sink to his disgust, all in order to save so much money you can both finally move into separate places. If you're not living like you're in the Odd Couple or in an immigrant worker camp it's totally pointless, because you're not saving enough money, and you also lose out on the experience of learning to loathe those you live with to an even greater extent than you probably will with three to four rooms.

And you will loathe him.

[batgirl]

Something else I forgot: Don't use a credit card. Yeah, it's a piece of advice everyone gives, but no one follows. This is why savings are so important! There's no sense in having a credit card unless you use it to purchase things you can't purchase any other way. NEVER use a credit card for an emergency unless you're positive you can pay it off with your next couple paycheques and you absolutely need it. Following this rule I have yet to carry a balance on my credit card and I've had it for nearly a year.

Edit: Oh yeah, and it's definitely easier to not share groceries. Me and my other 2 roomies even ended up buying our own margarine containers because one of us them gets crumbs in it and the other one likes "light" margarine. I guess we're picky but we prefer it this way. >_>

Not 100% in agreement with this. Having a credit card and building a credit history is important to being independent. If you need to:

1- Take out any loan
2- Buy or lease a car
3- Get an apartment

You need to have a credit history. My advice: have a credit card but don't use it often. Put 1 purchase a month on it that's around 20-40 bucks. A gas fill up, couple of movies, some groceries, a video game, etc. Pay this off as soon as you get the bill. This will build a credit history and the better the history, the more willing banks and landlords are able to trust you to lend you money or rent you a place. I have fantastic credit because I pay my bills on time and have been doing what I mentioned for years.

[Magus]

An easy way to build up credit is to get a department store credit card and pay it off at the time of purchase.

What you do is you get the card (Sears, J.C. Penny's, that sort of thing), and then when you buy something there you charge it to the card, then you can have the clerk pay the card off at the register immediately with cash. They just put your credit card number in I believe, I don't know what they do exactly but anyway then you just give them the cash amount and they pay it off. So you build credit and don't have to worry about paying the credit card bill off later.

[phil_]

Actually I would love to hear about this cause if I had to live with my brother I think I'd go nuts.Really? Ok.

We've lived in the same room for our entire lives, so continuing to share a room isn't a big deal. We only have four bowls and four plates and a tiny sink, so the whole "that guy fills the sink with dirty dishes" thing is impossible. Neither of us really cares who pays for what. Currently, I handle rent and _mike handles beer. As for "stealing" food, yeah, we have, like, a loaf of bread and some peanut butter in the room; not much to get upset over.

So, I guess it helps to live in poverty? Maybe with a dash of neither person is combative, passive-aggressive, or a straight-up asshole?

[Specterbane]

Not 100% in agreement with this. Having a credit card and building a credit history is important to being independent. If you need to:

1- Take out any loan
2- Buy or lease a car
3- Get an apartment

You need to have a credit history. My advice: have a credit card but don't use it often. Put 1 purchase a month on it that's around 20-40 bucks. A gas fill up, couple of movies, some groceries, a video game, etc. Pay this off as soon as you get the bill. This will build a credit history and the better the history, the more willing banks and landlords are able to trust you to lend you money or rent you a place. I have fantastic credit because I pay my bills on time and have been doing what I mentioned for years.

Actually, I've got amazing credit just from paying bills on time from utilities. I do use a credit card on occasion and pay it off right away, but way less than once a month. Either way building credit is great so that's by no means a bad way to do it, but it's probably more than you need from my experience. If you've got a bad habit of forgetting to pay people off I'd shy away from this advice a little, but if you're careful with your money this can be great advice to build your credit very quickly.

[Nique]

So, I guess it helps to live in poverty?

Sucks to be poor or in debt but on the other hand simple living sounds kinda nice. Thanks for sharing!

[shiney]

..., or a straight-up asshole?
Wait phil_ aren't you giving yourself and/or _mike way too much credit here.

[Marc v4.0]

On building credit, I tend to make credit purchases only when I have the cash to pay it right there at the counter, or I can get it no interest AND I have the money already.

That is how I got my computer last time, I had the cash already and put it on my Best buy card, which gave me 2 years of no interest to pay it off. I then set that cash to a side account and worked out the amount I would have to pay each month to pay it all off on the 2 year mark so I can build my credit carefully and easily.

[Nique]

Wait phil_ aren't you giving yourself and/or _mike way too much credit here.

OHSNAP. Hey actually remember when they shared an account?

[Krylo]

An easy way to build up credit is to get a department store credit card and pay it off at the time of purchase.

What you do is you get the card (Sears, J.C. Penny's, that sort of thing), and then when you buy something there you charge it to the card, then you can have the clerk pay the card off at the register immediately with cash. They just put your credit card number in I believe, I don't know what they do exactly but anyway then you just give them the cash amount and they pay it off. So you build credit and don't have to worry about paying the credit card bill off later.

On building credit, I tend to make credit purchases only when I have the cash to pay it right there at the counter

As both an ex-cashier and someone who has stood behind people like you in line before: You are both terrible people, and I hope that someone behind you in line punches you in the face.

That said, I find an easy way to build credit using a credit card is to, on any bill that allows it, have the service charge your credit card automatically every month, and then just transfer funds from your bank account monthly for the whole sum.

This has a couple of nice effects. The first is that it consolidates most/all of your bills, so you don't have to write a million checks and mail them out or go to a million websites or whatever else. You end up with one bill every month and that's it.

Secondly, it builds your credit. These are things you should be setting aside money for anyway, so you should be able to pay it all off immediately. And it's a constant use of credit, and thus a constant growth of credit (beyond even what you get for just paying off all your bills on time).

Thirdly, in the unfortunate event that you end up with an unexpected bill or an emergency, it allows you to, if for some reason your emergency funds are depleted, or whatever else, NOT lose all your shit (or get charged for being over drawn if you have them take it directly from your account instead). You can still pay the minimum, and tighten the belt for the next month or two to get everything copacetic again, paying off your credit card.

Which I nearly had to do when my unemployment ran out, I couldn't get a job (thus was dipping into my EXTENSIVE savings to pay bills for months), then when I finally did the IRS billed me for 300 dollars and my windshield wipers broke.

I'm legitimately broke for the first time in a very long time, and if anything else had happened/happens, I'd be pretty glad that I don't have to actually pay that phone bill etc. in full right now.

[phil_]

Wait phil_ aren't you giving yourself and/or _mike way too much credit here.What I meant by that is that neither of us is the type to, say, have a bad day, go home, and snap his roommate's computer in half because he can. Or someone who sells his roommate's Planet Earth collection for pot money. Those sort of things are what I meant by "a straight-up asshole."

[shiney]

Booze money is ok though, right?

[Marc v4.0]

As both an ex-cashier

Oh boo hoo, it was your job

and someone who has stood behind people like you in line before

I'll give you this one, but it is only something I have done 3 times, all of them on purchases that happen outside of your regular customer line (Wedding ring, Computer, my duster). Anyone who would do this for just buying regular shit is a moron and deserves to be hit, yes.

[Professor Smarmiarty]

I'm still tripping that people still mail cheques. Man if someone sent me a cheque I wouldn't even know what to do with it.

[Nikose Tyris]

I'm still tripping that people still mail cheques. Man if someone sent me a cheque I wouldn't even know what to do with it.

Cash it.



Also, I was under the impression just having a phone line in your own name built credit. Can someone confirm?

[pochercoaster]

Also, I was under the impression just having a phone line in your own name built credit. Can someone confirm?

I was under this impression as well. Like, I started building credit before I bought a credit card because I had a phone and I also pay rent...

[Krylo]

Oh boo hoo, it was your job

To be fair it's not so much the navigating the labyrinthine OS of the tills to find the credit section and pay it off that's a pain.

It's the five other customers in line glaring at you while you do it because some jackass decided they couldn't pay off their credit bill on the internet or by mailing a check* or whatever.

So basically, regardless of the position of the person dealing with it, it's really only irritating because it makes everyone else in line wait.

Though it's still a little irritating having to jump through hoops for someone for something silly like that, anyway, and there's something to be said for not trying to make someone's job harder. Especially someone in customer service, as customer service is basically the shittiest job ever.

Edit: Though to be totally fair, after the first time, I pretty much just zero'd out the credit payment and paid for it straight with cash in the normal screen, giving them no credit, but moving the line along much faster. Because fuck 'em.

*This is AMURKAH, Smarty. We spell check the proper AMURKUHN way.

[Professor Smarmiarty]

You got to spell it cheque though cause that broadens your scrabble posibilities with the tricksy q.

[Bells]

as someone who shared a small house for 3 months (longest i could hold) with a Girl (who was a friend, but not in a sexy way) you both need to have the same degree of commitment or it is going to be hell.

Just to let you know, i woke up everyday at around 8am, went out to look for a job that payed enough to pay the bills (really hard to do since i only had a cellphone, no credit, was from another state and had no previous jobs) and only went back home at around 00:00 (was trying college at the same time) and yet, every day for the last 2 months of this living hell, i woke up to see a small note on the side of the fridge (that was so broken that Mayonnaise froze up inside), a passive-aggressive note telling that "If i really wanted a job i should wake up sooner and look harder"... and that's from someone who worked all night as a "chatgirl" (yeah, you know what that means)

It's absolutely true, living with anyone changes everything. It's a whole new game and all the rules are weird. It's ok at first, but it changes over time.

You guys really need to work as a team. Or it's just 2 people living under the same roof, and as soon as one of you gets in trouble (as we all often do in life) the other one won't be able to hold the fort and the house is coming down.

So, really, if you really want to do this, communication is number one. You really should think about sitting down and going "Ok, tell me all about your bullshit and the things you will do that i'll get pissed about for the next 6 months" then you can tell if this can work or not... if you both are honest about.

[Magic_Marker]

Or someone who sells his roommate's Planet Earth collection for pot money.

I'm confused, if you aren't going to watch Cosmos or Planet Earth, what is the point of the pot in the first place?

[Krylo]

I'm confused, if you aren't going to watch Cosmos or Planet Earth, what is the point of the pot in the first place?

I think you're confusing things a bit.

The real question is what's the point of having Cosmos or Planet Earth if you don't also ALREADY have pot?

[Magic_Marker]

Truly a vicious cycle.