I'm a smoker again

[Fifthfiend]

ITT we tell me how stupid I am, hopefully I listen.

[Fifthfiend]

Ugggggggggh this is the grossest, worst habit, what the fuck is wrong with me.

[Seil]

Dammit man, haven't those anti-cigarette ads taught you anything? Smoking means you're Hitler!

http://files.advertolog.com/files/adsarchive/part_1173/11737155/file/anti-smoking-awareness-hitler-small-46311.jpg

[A Zarkin' Frood]

Man, fifth. Smoking is bad for your health and your wallet. It makes you look pretty cool, though...

[Bard The 5th LW]

images

Are those all actually made of cigarettes? Because if so then they bought alot of cigarettes to campaign against cigarettes.

But yeah, Fifth your a dumbass and smoking is bad, and those two statements are completely unrelated.

[Terex4]

Quitting smoking is the easiest thing in the world. I've done it several times ;)

I need to quit again though...ugh.

[Toastburner B]

http://www.bodyworlds.com/download/pressimages/previews/1233760593.jpg

http://www.bodyworlds.com/download/pressimages/previews/1233760527.jpg

Images taken from Body Worlds (http://www.bodyworlds.com/en/media/picture_database/thumbnails.html?category=4), which is basically an exhibit that features actual human bodies which have undergone some kind of preservation process. I didn't get the chance to see it myself when it came through town a while back, but I've heard plenty of people say the garbage cans near the bodies of smokers were filled with cigarettes people had thrown away after seeing the display.

[Osterbaum]

I managed to cut back and no only smoke a few occasionally, usually when drunk. I'm hoping to cut down on that too and eventually not smoke a single one ever.

ARE YOU GOING TO BE WORSE THAN ME!? DO YOU SUCK THAT MUCH!?

[McTahr]

Get one of those electric cigarettes, so that you can kill yourself with science*.

*Note: Electronic cigarettes are only a simulation and don't actually kill you, sadly.

[The SSB Intern]

Fifth, if you smoke, you are giving every tv show, commercial, and person, including yourself, a free pass to make you feel like shit. And they will all take it. There is nothing America loves better than bashing on those on whom it is socially acceptable. Smokers are basically like gingers here.

[Aerozord]

ITT we tell me how stupid I am, hopefully I listen.

you aren't stupid, just weak, very weak. of course its hard for you to stop, if you had strong willpower you wouldn't have given into peer pressure to start in the first place.

...what? Technically its true, beating addiction is pure willpower

[Eltargrim]

How long were you not smoking for? Apparently it takes 9 tries to quit; might as well start now!

[Solid Snake]

Toastburner's images make me feel quite happy that I am not in fact a smoker.

[Nique]

One billion out of every ten hot ladies hates your stank breath from smokin'

How long did you last before you gave in? A minor slump doesn't mean you have to consider yourself a smoker again. Give in to the power of positive thinking!

[akaSM]

You have to stop before it's too late (http://rlg4x.deviantart.com/art/L4D-Smoker-and-Spitter-3-181334306?q=gallery%3ARLG4X%2F16377621&qo=4)

[Fifthfiend]

How long were you not smoking for? Apparently it takes 9 tries to quit; might as well start now!

Five years maybe more like seven.

Probably it would have been more generally helpful to people if I'd have been clearer on the personal circumstances of all this but I'm going on like two hours of sleep here and it just didn't really occur to me that there were any reason why it wouldn't be the case that all of God's children across the Earth would be intimately acquainted with the particulars of my personal oddysey of addiction.

[Satan's Onion]

...

How long did you last before you gave in? A minor slump doesn't mean you have to consider yourself a smoker again. Give in to the power of positive thinking!

This here is extremely important to remember. The things you tell yourself when you relapse into smoking has a significant impact on how well you can get back to being successfully off the coffin nails. So don't beat yourself up about it, for fuck's sake; it'll do you no good. Just do whatever it takes to quit 'em again, even if it means handcuffing yourself to the pipe beneath the bathroom sink to keep yourself from buying more death sticks. Hell, it took my mother like three years just for her to feel confident in saying she was no longer a smoker, and she'd tried dozens of times to quit before it actually stuck.

[rpgdemon]

Fifth, if you smoke, you are giving every tv show, commercial, and person, including yourself, a free pass to make you feel like shit. And they will all take it. There is nothing America loves better than bashing on those on whom it is socially acceptable. Smokers are basically like gingers here.

And it's warranted. You're a jerk to everyone around you and the air is impossible to breathe and smells like crap. And most of all, you're a jerk to yourself, and anyone who gives a crap about you. The ones insulting you are one thing, you're being an inconvenience to them. But the ones who aren't insulting you, and are asking you to please quit for yourself, are the ones who you're hurting the most, by killing yourself away with them.

[The SSB Intern]

Okay, looking back it kinda seems like I'm pissed that smoking is growing more and more taboo, but I hate smoking so I am quite fine with this. I was just making the point that it's too much hassle to smoke in the first place, so don't even bother.

[Aerozord]

oh, this is actually relavent (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=g3aUW9o7P78)

always wanted to share this

I love this shame based motivation. Chowder has so many great life lessons

[Krylo]

Fuck the haters. You know who smoked? Humphrey Bogart smoked. James Dean smoked. Johnny Carson smoked. Hell, Flynn Errol not only smoked but ran a tobacco plantation.

Light 'er up.

[rpgdemon]

oh, this is actually relavent (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=g3aUW9o7P78)

always wanted to share this

I love this shame based motivation. Chowder has so many great life lessons

Now I want chowder.

[CABAL49]

This thread makes me want to have a cigarette.

I am from North Carolina, we sell the most tobacco products!

[EVILNess]

Light 'er up.

They are all dead. Not necessarily from the tobacco, but still...

Hey man, if you decide you want to quit again I hear wonderful things about the electronic cigarettes.

[synkr0nized]

Smoking makes your mouth taste terrible.
So there's that.

[Mr.Bookworm]

I'm with Krylo on this one.

You can be a pathetic loser who never does anything with your life or you can be John Wayne (http://i.dailymail.co.uk/i/pix/2008/09/25/article-1061713-0090EA9200000259-568_233x335.jpg), Sherlock Holmes (http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/4/47/SherlockHolmes.jpg), Clint Eastwood (http://3.bp.blogspot.com/_4-yBZr5goc4/TN5tTZC6M0I/AAAAAAAAAMM/T7_fyxv2LGQ/s1600/clint+eastwood_smoking01.jpg), and this monkey (http://turningdownthesuck.com/wp-content/uploads/2011/03/monkey_smoking_1a.jpg) all rolled into one.

These are the only two options. Pick.

[Professor Smarmiarty]

I'm going to quote the great philosoher, Camus
"Ciggies are sweet"

[Kim]

Smoking killed Ayn Rand. Clearly it must be doing something right.

[The Wandering God]

Smoking is an expensive habit. Wouldn't you rather spend that money on hookers?

[Azisien]

You're not John Wayne and you never will be. You have a fucking dancing pink pony in your avatar so you're clearly not Clint Eastwood or whoever the fuck other dead guy.

Get that ass-stick out of your mouth, unless you like ass I guess. Ass liker.

[BitVyper]

ITT we tell me how stupid I am, hopefully I listen.

You've triggered my trap card! (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Lung_cancer)

[Revising Ocelot]

I've never smoked.

You're superior to me, aren't you Fifth? Of course you are. Everyone is. That's why you're going to stop smoking, because otherwise I'd be showing you up. And that's terrible.

[Professor Smarmiarty]

American Tobacco was founded by James Buchanan (Duke), who shares his name with the greatest man in history.

[Donomni]

Fifth, you like money, right?

You like things bought with money that don't slowly kill you, right?

I mean, you could keep smoking, or you could be with all the COOL kids(like, ICE COLD) and get MLP: FiM when it comes out on DVD.

You aren't a poser, are you, Fifth?

[TDK]

What kind of question is that?

Of course Fifth is a poseur.

[Si Civa]

I don't know about that smoking is cool thing, 'cause smoking won't make you cool if you weren't cool before. Quite pretentious really if you are trying too hard.

However, putting cigarette on your guitar is pretty cool visual. (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rq6r23-le5o) Or on bass. (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tMpGdG27K9o) Probably were on their mouths before that though.

[Magus]

Well, like my uncle, there is the fact that if you continue smoking them and live long enough every waking minute will feel as if you are slowly drowning,and then you will slowly die. So I mean if you want to feel like you're being waterboarded 24 hours a day...go for it!

[pochercoaster]

My grandfather smoked and drank heavily throughout his life until he died at 91. Then again he was french, so I guess the question is whether or not you have the right genes!

[Doc ock rokc]

Its ok fifth. We'll just kill you and then you'll re spawn as a boomer or something.

OK joke aside Try Hypnotism. It worked for my grandmother.

[Kerensky287]

Are you a money kind of guy?

Just for kicks, take note of how much money per month you spend on cigarettes. Take note, as well, of how much you spend on food, entertainment, transportation, and so forth. This is just for comparison.

Then, at the end of the month, look at how much you would have saved if you could stop smoking. Then, stop smoking and spend exactly that amount on booze and whores.

Two for the price of one.

[Azisien]

I heard from a friend of a friend that cigarettes are actually really healthy for you. I think they have antioxidants to lower your PD thingys.

Also my uncle is 106 years old and he's been sucking on the chimney of a smoking lounge for 40 years as a full time job, while also smoking himself. He can bench more than me.

Come to think of it, I'm pretty sure cigarettes will improve your bench press.

[Krylo]

OK joke aside Try Hypnotism. It worked for my grandmother.

Says the mind taker.

[Doc ock rokc]

Says the mind taker.

cute....But seriously Your mind is already against it. All a hypnotist would do is Reeforce that urge to get off of them with the same urge that puts you on them. It worked for my Stubborn as fucking hell grandma it will work for you.

also on the Cigs are healthy for you thing. it is true that some things found in cigs are healthy in moderation...but the rest of the stuff usually does more damage then what the other benifits. Your grandpa is just fucking boss from the Greatest generation.

[Fenris]

I heard from a friend of a friend that cigarettes are actually really healthy for you. I think they have antioxidants to lower your PD thingys.

Also my uncle is 106 years old and he's been sucking on the chimney of a smoking lounge for 40 years as a full time job, while also smoking himself. He can bench more than me.

Come to think of it, I'm pretty sure cigarettes will improve your bench press.........?

Christ, I hope you're kidding.

[pochercoaster]

also on the Cigs are healthy for you thing. it is true that some things found in cigs are healthy in moderation...but the rest of the stuff usually does more damage then what the other benifits. Your grandpa is just fucking boss from the Greatest generation.

Yeah, I never meant to say they were healthy for you, just that you have to be the right kind of badass to smoke and not get lung cancer. *nod nod*

But seriously I've never seen my mom without a cigarette in her hand and besides already having asthma she regularly gets chest infections and occasionally serious bouts of pneumonia that last for a few weeks at a time. At the ripe old age of 43. Sooo that puts me off of smoking. I also used to inhale so much second hand smoke that the doctor refused to believe me when I said I wasn't a smoker yet kept getting chest infections and coughs myself. The problem resolved itself a week after I moved out.

Fifth, why don't you try those nicotine patches? Somehow I don't think telling someone over and over how bad smoking is for you is gonna make them quit. It's more about strategies for weening off of a chemical dependency.

[CABAL49]

Living kills you. Seriously. Show me something that doesn't kill you.

[The Wandering God]

Living kills you. Seriously. Show me something that doesn't kill you.
Hope

[Intern Nin]

http://www.mspaintadventures.com/storyfiles/hs2/03325.gif
I think that's been debunked.

[Fenris]

Living kills you. Seriously. Show me something that doesn't kill you.

Well that's depressing!

I think there's a difference between "kills you," as we all are slowly dying away in our own bodies, and "makes your life objectively worse (coughing, withdrawal, financial drain, etc.) before killing you, several years ahead of when you would naturally leave barring unforseen circumstances."

[Magus]

Anecdotes for the win, forget those statistics.

GUYS, ONE TIME THIS GUY WAS THROWN FREE OF HIS CAR IN A WRECK AND IF HE HADN'T BEEN THROWN FREE OF HIS CAR IN THAT WRECK ONE OF THE COPS OR WHATEVER SAID HE WOULD HAVE DIED. THAT'S WHY I NEVER WEAR SEATBELTS.

^Almost word for word what one of my friends told me one time. I find it ironic that he has also wrecked about five cars, at least two rollovers. The last one was during an ice storm, I asked him how fast he was going. "Only 70."

Clearly the sharpest tool in the shed.

[The Murderer]

You know love can kill you too. Just look at black mages hadoken.

[Professor Smarmiarty]

If you rearrange smoke you get moske.

[Fifthfiend]

I think there's a difference between "kills you," as we all are slowly dying away in our own bodies, and "makes your life objectively worse (coughing, withdrawal, financial drain, etc.) before killing you, several years ahead of when you would naturally leave barring unforseen circumstances."

Yeah the way I quit smoking the last time wasn't even on the prospect that it might kill me in the distant future - in a horribly prolonged painful way that at the outside chance involves me breathing from a hole cut out of my neck - so much as the day to day just feeling like shit, smelling like ass, and having that tightness/burning in my chest that never really totally goes away.

[Bobbey]

I've never smoked anything (being cigarettes, cigars or pot), mostly because of lack of interest and that I hated the smell of cigarettes as a child. I grew up in a family of smokers, my mom used to smoke 2 packs a day, my dad maybe 1, and whenever I'd visit my family on my mother's side, everyone would be smoking in an enclosed space and ash trays were practically never cleaned from their contents, resulting in small mounds of ash and filters. Lets just say that I preferred spending my time alone outside, away from the smoke as a child, since I easily suffered headaches from the smoke (still do today).

My grand father died of lung complications due to smoking (and the fact that he was a heavy drinker as well) and my dad recently got surgery done in his left leg for a blocked artery due to the same problems. He's still smoking as much as before though, which worries me a lot, and won't change his habits even though I've talked to him about it many times.

I've never smoked, so I have no clue how difficult it can be to quit all together, or how easy it is to be tempted to smoke again after quitting, but I encourage you to try and quit again for your own sake in the future.

[Satan's Onion]

For what it's worth, I was talking with my mother recently about when she quit smoking, and she said that once you finally do quit in a way that sticks, and you realize that it's stuck and you can say "hey, I've been off the smokes for [x time period]", it feels pretty goddamn sweet. It can take dozens of attempts, yes, but the only sure way to fail at getting rid of the habit is to give up trying.

[The Murderer]

I've always hated the smell of cigerattes. I've never smoked anything in my life either. At my workplace there are several people who smoke all the time and i'm constantly holding my breath and trying to avoid them because i just hate the smell that much. The only person in my family who smokes is my grandma and now she has to carry around an oxygen tank...

[Mondt]

First, a song about your problem (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XVpbrdj6GSU)!
Second, the "Love song" referred to in the song (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bDrlq5NkAO0)! Well, that's what I inferred anyway.

Seriously though. Hole in your throat, loved ones perception of you, your perception of you, having to literally put life on pause every so often because of some shit that isn't even good for you, it costs a shit ton of money, you're helping perpetuate smoking within humanity as a whole, some other shit (if this sort of thing motivates you).

Every smoker I know hates it and wants to quit, thinks it's totally disgusting. Separate yourself from them by actually quitting.

[Bard The 5th LW]

My dad smokes, and he is sorta an ass. Also, he smokes in the workout room. I'm just like WHY?

[Seil]

Hey Fifthfiend, please stop smoking.

[Amake]

My tip is to sack up and quit before things get out of hand. One day you might get word of a business that helps people quit smoking, and before you know what's happening they're taking your Autistic son into a room with an electrified floor because they somehow found out you had a smoke when you were stuck in traffic. And then they bill you for the electricity, just to twist the knife.

Okay, that's the plot of a short story by Stephen King. But the point is, if you allow yourself to be controlled by this thing that doesn't mean you well - cigarettes - ugly things may happen to you. And you will be powerless to stop them happening. Because you are a slave. Do you value your personal freedom? Then fight the addiction.

This is how I motivate myself to not be addicted to caffeine. Hope it helps.

[DestinedCruz]

tl;dr

You're stupid Fifth.

EDIT: Oh, that's still my sig. Hilarity ensues.

[BitVyper]

Okay but seriously, remember how this felt (http://www.nuklearforums.com/showpost.php?p=967272&postcount=80) and stop smoking. Like you already know you can make it that far, so you don't even have an excuse.

[Ecks]

I don't smoke myself, but I live with two smokers. My old man and his lady are smokers, and my mom's husband's parents (my stepgrandparents) are smokers. I would go to school every day smelling like smoke, and if I hadn't been an "upstanding member of the student body" (lol) I would've had school administrators on my ass all the time about it. I don't quite understand what part of sticking something that's burning into your mouth and breathing it in is so appealing, I guess I am just not one of these cool kids you internet weirdos keep talking about.

Seriously, fifth, man the fuck up and stop sucking on the cancer cocks. You will continue to feel like shit until you die. Quit, and you will feel better, you'll have more money to spend on booze and hookers, and you won't stink to high heaven all the time. In other words, ditto what everyone else said, except I coined the term "cancer cocks."

[Fifthfiend]

Day 2 of re-quitting: wicked, wicked craving right now, MUST RIDE IT OUT

[Mr.Bookworm]

The cravings are Godhand (http://www.nuklearforums.com/showpost.php?p=941169&postcount=30), using faulty assumptions and logical fallacies to assault the SCIENCE that is your body.

[Terex4]

You're doing a helluva lot better than I did. Keep it up man!

[Satan's Onion]

Day 2 of re-quitting: wicked, wicked craving right now, MUST RIDE IT OUT

You did it once; you can do it now! :dance:

If you need any help keeping your mind off the shitty parts of quitting, I expect we can find you stuff to keep you busy. Like, hell I dunno, watching/reading the complete works of Shakespeare, even the shitty ones like Titus Andronicus.

Or meth. You could do meth.

[Meister]

http://i.imgur.com/KCyeS.png

[Kim]

Oh, wow, his art's really improved. /offtopic

[Bobbey]

Day 2 of re-quitting: wicked, wicked craving right now, MUST RIDE IT OUT

Glad to hear that (the quitting part) :) Keep it up, it'll get easier within a few days. I think drinking a glass of water whenever you have a craving might help (I know it helps me when I'm on a diet and I suddenly have an urge to get some ice cream at Dairy Queen's...). Congrats though!