Live, from NPF, it's Saturday Night

[Nique]

Good evening and what can I tell you?

In this thread at your request I will assign you an Avatar and user title based on SNL sketches.

In the meantime, read up on Deep Thoughts by Jack Handey.

[Shyria Dracnoir]

Candygram?

(take this as an expression of interest)

[POS Industries]

In the meantime, read up on Deep Thoughts by Jack Handey.
“If you ever fall off the Sears Tower, just go real limp, because maybe you'll look like a dummy and people will try to catch you because, hey, free dummy.”

[Kim]

SPICY

[Satan's Onion]

I'd like a new avatar. Because I'm good enough, I'm smart enough, and doggone it, people like me!

[Nique]

Candygram?

http://img718.imageshack.us/img718/1053/landshark.png

User Title: I'm only a dolphin, Ma'am...

“If you ever fall off the Sears Tower, just go real limp, because maybe you'll look like a dummy and people will try to catch you because, hey, free dummy.”

http://img213.imageshack.us/img213/632/bushz.png

User Title: You're welcome, America.

SPICY

http://img3.imageshack.us/img3/149/churchlady.png

Sig or Title: 'Well isn't that special". Also you have to harass Satan's Onion.

I'd like a new avatar. Because I'm good enough, I'm smart enough, and doggone it, people like me!

http://img249.imageshack.us/img249/7607/lank.png

User Title: Just pick up, and start talking

[Satan's Onion]

Nice.

[Shyria Dracnoir]

Me likey.

[Lost in Time]

Yeah, sounds good. Let's do this.

[Mr.Bookworm]

I am bereft of comedy and would like to participate in this venture.

[Flarecobra]

I live...in a van... down by the river!

(Bonus rep if it's animated.)

[Doc ock rokc]

I got a fever and the only cure is more avatars

[Arcanum]

Christmas is over and done with so my current avatar is outdated. Please fix this.

[batgirl]

If you can find me a "Coffee Talk" Linda Richman avatar I'd be your best friend.

I've got shpilkes in my genechtagezoink! It's like Buttah!

[Nique]

Yeah, sounds good. Let's do this.

http://img839.imageshack.us/img839/2254/patuf.jpg

Sig/title: A lot of people say, "What's that?" It's Pat!


I am bereft of comedy and would like to participate in this venture.

Mr. Bookworm, meet Mr. Robinson.

http://img689.imageshack.us/img689/2518/mrrobins.jpg

Sig/title: Hello, boys and girls!


I live...in a van... down by the river!

I had to find a gif for you.
http://i.imgur.com/K2nYb.gif

No ideas for a user title yet.

I got a fever and the only cure is more avatars

http://img703.imageshack.us/img703/6677/continentali.jpg

Sig/Title: "I have spilled some wine. All over your boob."


Christmas is over and done with so my current avatar is outdated. Please fix this.

http://img851.imageshack.us/img851/5316/harryp.jpg

Sig/title:: "On Moische! On Herschel! On Schlomo!"


I've got shpilkes in my genechtagezoink! It's like Buttah!

http://img508.imageshack.us/img508/3886/lindawu.jpg

Sig/title: shpilkes.

EDIT: Huh. The gif didn't take. I'm dumb. :(

EDIT again: Thanks Phil!

[phil_]

http://img508.imageshack.us/img508/9590/13862948.gif
EDIT: Huh. The gif didn't take. I'm dumb. :(Imageshack won't let free users upload animated gifs anymore. Host it on imgur or something and it'll work.

Oh, and I'm good for avatars, thanks. No need to fix me anything.

[Fifthfiend]

Make it so WAIT, FUCK, wrong avatars-thread theme, dammit

[Nique]

I feel like that's referencing a skit like 'Mr. Short Term Memory' but not that one.

[Arcanum]

Trading in one outdated holiday-themed avatar for another. I can dig it.

[Archbio]

Our top story tonight: this dinosaur is still death.

[Shyria Dracnoir]

http://i.imgur.com/K2nYb.gif

If Flare doesn't want it, I'll take it as a sig image

[Marc v4.0]

Let's Do This!

[Nique]

Let's Do This!

Hear me now, and believe me later

http://i.imgur.com/18kcL.jpg

Get off your flat flabby fanny and use this picture of famous Austrian veightlifter.

EDIT: Hearing is not the same as hereing!

[Grandmaster_Skweeb]

I'll bite. Been rock in Fifth's Doc Oc long enough.

[Nique]

http://i.imgur.com/k2vgb.jpg

How'd you get so funky?

EDIT: Sorry forgot to say - Skweeb this one is for you.

[Fifthfiend]

Who is that one even for

[Flarecobra]

I'm using it Shy.

And I thought of the perfect title for it that brings up horrors of NPF past.

[Fifthfiend]

And I thought of the perfect title for it that brings up horrors of NPF past.

Goddamn, score.

[Nique]

Who is that one even for

That was for Skweeb.

If you want one... I'm thinking Tommy Flanagan, Pathological Liar.


"Ah, I see you got my flyer"

Haha. I'm sorry 'I spilled wine all over your boob' didn't fit.

[Doc ock rokc]

Yeah bI had to re-watch that 5 times to both find something that fit and remember it at the end.

[Solid Snake]

Man, why would you all deliberately change your avatars to material from such a crappy show?

[Nique]

diiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiick

[Solid Snake]

diiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiick

Well I mean, sure, SNL was a great show.
Thirty years ago.
Like, literally, I wasn't even born the last time the show was great.

I mean this would be like me creating a Simpsons avatar thread ten years from now, only imagine that over the next decade The Simpsons becomes progressively worse, like even worse than it is now, until by 2021 it's literally the worst shit on television, and everyone is collectively ashamed to have formerly liked the show when it was great, that's how crappy it would have to become.

...Only for the comparison to be completely accurate most of you would have to be about ten years younger in 2021, so that you literally would not have been alive the last time The Simpsons was amazing, therefore rendering the effort especially irrelevant.

[Nique]

I seriously have no idea how to respond to this.

EDIT: Like, SNL is one of teevees longest running shows with a long history of funny, popular, and culturally relevant skits. It's not the best thing ever but it's a de facto institution of network television. I'm... not supposed to like some of it, apparently? Or even enjoy the irony of it's lamer moments?

Also, Re: The Simpsons (http://www.escapistmagazine.com/videos/view/the-big-picture/5140-The-Simpsons-Is-Still-Funny-Pt-1)

[Solid Snake]

I seriously have no idea how to respond to this.

EDIT: Like, SNL is one of teevees longest running shows with a long history of funny, popular, and culturally relevant skits. It's not the best thing ever but it's a de facto institution of network television. I'm... not supposed to like some of it, apparently? Or even enjoy the irony of it's lamer moments?

Also, Re: The Simpsons (http://www.escapistmagazine.com/videos/view/the-big-picture/5140-The-Simpsons-Is-Still-Funny-Pt-1)

I usually really dig Moviebob's analysis of situations but I can't say I completely agree with his most recent assessment regarding The Simpsons. I mean I do think he's onto something with, for example, his idea regarding why we initially were drawn to The Simpsons as children and why our gradual awareness of its deeper and more mature themes driving many of its episodes may have driven it to the height of its popularity in the era that it blossomed, but it still doesn't change the fact that, objectively speaking, I personally believe the quality of the writing itself has declined immensely in recent seasons.

BRIEF EDIT INTERLUDE: Like, I don't think MovieBob's point actually contradicts the belief that The Simpsons' quality has objectively deteroriated, I think it's entirely possible to both ascribe to MovieBob's theory as an explanation to "why The Simpsons was particularly popular in the late nineties" while still adhering to the separate and independent belief that these days the writing has taken a nosedive. Sure, MovieBob's theory may accurately explain why The Simpsons couldn't be as great now as it was then, even if it was written as well as it could have been written, but that doesn't change the fact that The Simpsons has still gotten worse.

As for SNL, it's not me being a hipster, it's just me absolutely personally and completely subjectively hating SNL. Seriously, I'm trying to think of a comedy television series ("cultural institution" or not) I dislike more than SNL, and I'm completely drawing blanks. I'm not the biggest Cracked fan so it's really saying something that I thoroughly appreciate Cracked's daily amateur comedy articles on the interwebs more than I've ever appreciated about 95% of SNL's skits.

The one exception is the Lonely Island (http://www.thelonelyisland.com/) skits, I'll concede I actually have enjoyed a few of those, though in order to stomach liking them I have pretended in my mind that they are in no way associated with SNL.

So no I'm not a hipster, I'm totally down for liking things that are popular in the mainstream that actually deserve the accolades. (Would a hipster's favorite Final Fantasy be Final Fantasy VII? I doubt it.) It's just that SNL is one of the very few very popular things that I personally avidly despise, like I hate it, I desperately want artists and actors I like to stay the hell away from it, I despise nearly every one of its skits with every fiber of my being.

...Unless you're talking about SNL from like thirty years ago, yeah, that was great shit. I'd have some grandiose theory as to exactly how and why SNL fell apart if I actually cared enough to do the research.

[Kim]

The thing I don't get is why you gotta come in here for the express purpose of being a complete bag of dicks.

[Kim]

It is like someone rounded up all the dicks in the tri-county area, put them in a bag, and then threw them into this thread, shouting as they did, "Go! Go and be free! Spread your dickwings and fly!"

[Solid Snake]

The thing I don't get is why you gotta come in here for the express purpose of being a complete bag of dicks.

You of all people are asking me that question?

I mean that's kind of like Fifthfiend asking me to tone down the rhetoric, or Bob the Mercenary asking me to stop defending Christianity, or you asking me to stop identifying and arguing against persisting offensive homophobic and/or sexist stereotypes in animes.

But no it's a free country, and if folks can post stuff talking about how SNL is so rad I can post stuff sayin' why I disagree with SNL bein' rad.
Also, I really just hate SNL.

[Kim]

But no it's a free country

So your reason for hopping into this thread to take a figurative dump on everyone participating in it for the Great and Terrible Crime of having fun is, "Because I can."

[Kim]

This isn't even a thread about SNL in the straightforward sense, wherein it would make sense to discuss the good and bad of the show in general, how its progressed over the years, and the skits we do or do not like. This is an avatar thread, and coming into to an avatar thread just to be a dick just seems rather uncool.

[Solid Snake]

So your reason for hopping into this thread to take a figurative dump on everyone participating in it for the Great and Terrible Crime of having fun is, "Because I can."

It just saddens me that the last bastion of sanity and great collective opinions on the interwebs, the last website filled with people whose opinions and perspectives I genuinely agreed with and supported, would stab me in the back when I wasn't looking and turn out to be filled to the brim with folks who actually like Saturday Night Live.

And now your avatars are going to remind me of this atrocity. All of your avatars!! For the next however many weeks!!!

Oh God now I'm going to have to put one of those "Are you actually taking me seriously?" Disclaimers on my posts, aren't I? Why is it that someone like Fifthfiend can totally get away with expressing his disapproval of something in such a way that everyone simultaneously acknowledges his dissent yet just intuitively knows he's joking around? I need to take classes from him and learn from an expert at this stuff.

[Kim]

Probably because Fifth doesn't spend Thirty Goddamn Paragraphs explaining why _____ sucks and everyone who likes _____ is wrong and terrible.

[Solid Snake]

Probably because Fifth doesn't spend Thirty Goddamn Paragraphs explaining why _____ sucks and everyone who likes _____ is wrong and terrible.

Now you good sir are grossly exaggerating.

Thirty paragraphs? I don't even count ten in my longest post!!!!

Also like, how the hell was the fact that I was joking around when "chastising" NPF members not clear? I think you're misconstruing my very real, totally-not-jokin' hatred of SNL with my totally not-remotely-serious comments regarding the NPF community's appreciation of something I dislike.

To elaborate, what I did was no different than, say, Fifthfiend responding to a Chrono Cross avatar thread by simultaneously sincerely expressing his disdain for Chrono Cross, while adding a "seriously you fuckers like that shit what is wrong with you?" line at the end, and yet somehow he does so in a way that everyone intuitively knows that he is not in fact seriously labeling everyone on NPF who likes Chrono Cross an actual fucker or asshole. There is no difference! My deliberately exaggerated condemnations of NPF were intended to make you laugh in a similar manner, in fact.

[phil_]

small textSnake. Snake buddy. I got an idea for you; give this a spin. What if, what if, Liz is just funnin' back?

On an unrelated note, take a survey of how many avatars are from post-2000 SNL.

Also also:The thing I don't get is why you gotta come in here for the express purpose of being a complete bag of dicks.He wants an avatar, of course. I wonder if Nique can find something with ponies.

[Solid Snake]

Also also:He wants an avatar, of course. I wonder if Nique can find something with ponies.

Nah, man.
It's gotta be diiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiicks

(Or a bag of dicks)

[Doc ock rokc]

Snake make sure you add [/sarcasm] at the end of your sarcastic remarks...You know what. The English language really needs a sarcasm sign.

[Nique]

Nah, man.
It's gotta be diiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiicks

There is this skit with John Belushi, I think, and he comes out of the bathroom in this nightclub with like 5 feet worth of paper towels stuffed into his pants to make his dick look bigger. I seriously cannot find an image or video clip of this anywhere.


So you get this:

http://i.imgur.com/krybh.jpg

Title: Step One - Cut a hole in box.

[Nique]

Our top story tonight: this dinosaur is still death.

I wasn't sure if this was a clear expression of interest, but just in case:

http://i.imgur.com/HLAPc.jpg

Yeeeah... That's the ticket!

[Hatake Kakashi]

The only thing you can really say to it is:

"Suck it, Trebek. Suck it long, and suck it hard."

[walkertexasdruid]

I am thinking either "Oooweee, wutupwtidat, wutupwitdat?", or "Mr Pibb plus Red Vines equals crazy delicious!".

[Archbio]

And I put it up as my avatar.

Yeeeah, that's what happened.

[Nique]

Sorry guys, having a little computer trouble. Will try to get some celebrity jeopardy and what up wit dat avatars made up as soon as I can.

In the meantime, enjoy this classic 'Deep Thought'

“One thing kids like is to be tricked. For instance, I was going to take my little nephew to Disneyland, but instead I drove him to an old burned-out warehouse. "Oh, no," I said. "Disneyland burned down." He cried and cried, but I think that deep down, he thought it was a pretty good joke. I started to drive over to the real Disneyland, but it was getting pretty late.”

[Nique]

I am thinking either "Oooweee, wutupwtidat, wutupwitdat?", or "Mr Pibb plus Red Vines equals crazy delicious!".

You know, I didn't like 'What up with that?' at first, partly because it just went on way too long and Keenan is usually painfully unfunny. Then I actually sat through the entire skit a couple times and then he goes back to singing over and over and I finally got the joke.

[synkr0nized]

I'm using it Shy.

And I thought of the perfect title for it that brings up horrors of NPF past.

How to make a high-quality thread better: achieved

[Flarecobra]

Well, I needed to fill out my "Mind Scarring" quota for the year in a hurry.