Statement of Purpose A.K.A. the who what now?

[McTahr]

So, I'm looking at a whole lot of grad school applications, and they have this one section I haven't filled out yet that says "Statement of Purpose" and expects me to like, type words and shit and be all personable.

And of course, I could hop in my googlecopter and fly over the intertubes to web me up a respectable answer as to just what all that entails and the best way to go about it.

But I'd rather hear from the peanut gallery.

So, suggestions?

I know what it is, in the sense that I know where China is. Like, I could find it on a globe, but ask me to busk out some directions and you're going to get a hand-drawn picture of you eating a cock or three.

[Nique]

Something something ... human spirit ... something something ... student of life ... impact on the world ... something something uh, meaningful contribution to society...

And so on.

[Fenris]

a hand-drawn picture of you eating a cock or three.

I think that should just about cover it, really.

[Doc ock rokc]

Well this isn't something we can exactly help you out on.this the kind of thing you have to solve on your own. It's your purpose. The reason why you do what you do. You want to make the world better? You will live your life for someone else? Is what you do. Just an old hobby work curiosity that you just so happen to love? We can't really do anything to help you in writing this because it's all about you and what we know is only a small sliver of what could really be the the entity known only to us as McTahr

[Magus]

It's just stupid bullshit that they probably won't read very closely, just generic the fuck out of it and get it over with.

Reminds me being asked to write a fucking "philosophy of teaching" nine hundred times. There's only so many ways to say, "so they don't fucking turn into drug dealers and can maybe be successful in college if they don't decide to just party all the damn time".

EDIT: Like it's basically probably the "cover letter" of your "resume" to get into graduate school. Does it come first, before everything else, pretty much? Just talk about why you are pursuing whatever masters or doctorate in whatever career it is you are getting the degree in until you fill the space in or write about a page. Then move on.

[Azisien]

Make sure to lie a lot whenever it is convenient or improves the way you look to the bored entry person stuck reading 1500 slight variations of these Statements.

[Geminex]

Discuss the difficulties of being a superhero in this day and age, hint at your secret identity and close with a vow to stop evildoers everywhere.

[McTahr]

Five posts to get to the joke answers, if you don't count Fenris (and who does). Shameful, NPF. I was expecting a much quicker descent.

[Nique]

Mine was totally a joke! It was like, joke city all up in there!

[McTahr]

Sorry, SNL just has me desensitized to anything it's associated with. I just see the avatars and immediately get this overwhelming feeling of "Not funny."

[Nique]

Diiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiick!

[Aldurin]

Write about how you intend to tear the grad school system apart from the inside-out, starting when you get strong enough connections within the administration. Specify in great detail the fates of anyone who tries to stop you during your conquest.

Then draw random genitalia in the borders of the paper, or fold that whole page of the application into a giant origami phallus.

[Osterbaum]

These kind of 'cover letters' suck ass, big time. They are always so annoying. Just write something about becoming a productive member of society and blaah blaah blaah

[shiney]

Write a really long trolling paragraph where you toss in a bunch of song titles from an artist and try to make it sound legitimate, but the entire premise of the whole damn thing is just to work in the songs. You could also do this with movie titles that feature a common actor.

You have to do this. Come on.

[Darth SS]

Y'know, I'm writing my own statement of intent right now. And I can't help but notice that unlike most people who write these, I'm actually excited to write mine. In fact, I'm actually excited for grad school, and I'm looking forward to my thesis.

So...is that weird?

[Gregness]

Do you even really need it? I just took a professional communication class this last semester and one of the things we covered was writing a proper resume and how you should kick the 'objective' section to the fucking curb because it's redundant and useless. Statement of intent sounds pretty similar, am I wrong?

[Fifthfiend]

Whatever because it's the part that everyone involved will give the absolute least fucks about.

Do you even really need it? I just took a professional communication class this last semester and one of the things we covered was writing a proper resume and how you should kick the 'objective' section to the fucking curb because it's redundant and useless. Statement of intent sounds pretty similar, am I wrong?

Oh god yes thank Jesus someone somewhere is teaching people this, if I never had to look at another shittily written objective statement and then delete it I would fucking die happy.

THAT SAID it's probably part of the actual application forms he's filling out so SOMETHING has to go in that box but again like I said literally nobody on earth will actually care about it or even have the time to hypothetically consider caring about it's only on the form because some airheaded fuckwit with zero to do with the actual selection process decided to shit it onto there so yeah per my original statement just slap out any old bullshit, whatev.

[Fifthfiend]

Just write the most airy hippie-dippie shit you can think of like you were an english major weren't you, you know WORDS

Just plop out a like

"to serve the human community by enhancing the prestige of this great university by working to further the goals of The Academy with the great human cause of the field of [YOUR FIELD] thereby to strive to advance the common lot of Our Brothers And Sisters, the human race"

or whatever the shit.

[McTahr]

Write a really long trolling paragraph where you toss in a bunch of song titles from an artist and try to make it sound legitimate, but the entire premise of the whole damn thing is just to work in the songs. You could also do this with movie titles that feature a common actor.

You have to do this. Come on.

Kevin Bacon movies. Coming right up.

[CelesJessa]

Dear Sir/Madame

My interest in (plural noun) blossomed during my (adjective) years. It was the time when (noun) had begun to (verb) the lives of (plural noun) in (place). Hence (verb ending in-ing) with (noun) as my major was the first choice for my (adjective) studies. Right since the beginning of my undergraduate study (plural noun) is a subject that has (verb past tense) me with its (plural noun). The (plural noun) that I have (verb past tense) include (plural noun) and (plural noun). These (verb past tense) the foundation for my courses in (plural noun) at a later stage. My undergraduate studies already focus on the (adjective) aspect of (noun). A masters degree in (college major) with (noun) as (adjective) field is the next logical step.

[Doc ock rokc]

it honestly saddens me how little people care about this

[Magus]

I'm pretty sure your GPA and whatever references from various professors you've had in undergraduate studies count for x1000000000000000000 more than this Statement of Purpose.

Like you know what it honestly reminds me of? The essay portion of your senior project you did in high school. Like, if you fucking, repainted the lobby, or whatever the fuck free-ass-labor/forced-charity thing you did, were they really going to keep you from graduating because your essay wasn't up to snuff?

I'd repeat this statement for the entire idea of a senior project if I wasn't 100% sure at least one person here took their senior project seriously and like, fucking, helped children with no hands write hand-made Christmas cards for the families of dead troops, or, whatever the hell thing that one kid in your class did that made the principal get on your shit when you just tried to do something easy like organize a student-faculty basketball game or volunteer at the YMCA on weekends and weeknights for a few months.

[Gregness]

it honestly saddens me how little people care about this

Doc, why are you sad when you have CAREER MADLIBS!

Dear Sir/Madame

My interest in (plural noun) blossomed during my (adjective) years. It was the time when (noun) had begun to (verb) the lives of (plural noun) in (place). Hence (verb ending in-ing) with (noun) as my major was the first choice for my (adjective) studies. Right since the beginning of my undergraduate study (plural noun) is a subject that has (verb past tense) me with its (plural noun). The (plural noun) that I have (verb past tense) include (plural noun) and (plural noun). These (verb past tense) the foundation for my courses in (plural noun) at a later stage. My undergraduate studies already focus on the (adjective) aspect of (noun). A masters degree in (college major) with (noun) as (adjective) field is the next logical step.

go.

[Fenris]

Five posts to get to the joke answers, if you don't count Fenris (and who does). Shameful, NPF. I was expecting a much quicker descent.

http://i44.tinypic.com/15x0gaq.png

[CelesJessa]

I care, but my honest advice would revolve around writing "how to write a statement of purpose" in the google searchbar. I figured statement-of-purpose madlibs were more fun.

[McTahr]

Fenris, I mostly want to give you negarep for pretty much just editing the one in the mod forum of someone else and sticking my name on there, but it's just so damn accurate.

P.S. Thanks for getting my good side.

[Amake]

Write about how old you not, and how no one at your age should know what they're doing or what they want to do, and what you want most is to figure out what's really important in life and how you're going to do it, and you don't care if it takes twenty years or fifty to find those answers, because it's important to do these things right.

[Geminex]

Fenris, I mostly want to give you negarep for pretty much just editing the one in the mod forum of someone else and sticking my name on there, but it's just so damn accurate.

P.S. Thanks for getting my good side.

Man, that pic has been going around for ages featuring a bunch of people. Me included, I believe!

Though wait, if it started life in the mod forum, who'd it depict there?

[Aldurin]

Everyone who doesn't have access to the mod forum.

[Darth SS]

Write about how old you not, and how no one at your age should know what they're doing or what they want to do, and what you want most is to figure out what's really important in life and how you're going to do it, and you don't care if it takes twenty years or fifty to find those answers, because it's important to do these things right.

Here's a crazy idea.

Write down why you're applying.

[Fifthfiend]

Fenris, I mostly want to give you negarep for pretty much just editing the one in the mod forum of someone else and sticking my name on there, but it's just so damn accurate.

P.S. Thanks for getting my good side.

http://i606.photobucket.com/albums/tt148/fifthfiend/reactions/14b6nh2.gif (http://nuklearforums.com/showthread.php?t=34060)

[McTahr]

http://i606.photobucket.com/albums/tt148/fifthfiend/reactions/14b6nh2.gif (http://nuklearforums.com/showthread.php?t=34060)

It's of a mod in there, too. Don't hate!

[Fifthfiend]

It's of a mod in there, too. Don't hate!

http://i606.photobucket.com/albums/tt148/fifthfiend/reactions/qn0g8n.gif

[McTahr]

http://i57.photobucket.com/albums/g229/JimJimtheInfernalJanitor/Random%20NPF/haters-yo-gabba-gabba.gif

[Fifthfiend]

http://i.imgur.com/GQAbQ.gif[/IMG]"]http://i.imgur.com/gJEU7.gif[/img]"]http://i606.photobucket.com/albums/tt148/fifthfiend/emoticons/fartztag.gif

[Satan's Onion]

Well, this one went straight to hell animated .gifs hell quickly enough.

[Fifthfiend]

Well, this one went straight to hell animated .gifs hell quickly enough.

http://i606.photobucket.com/albums/tt148/fifthfiend/letsplay/sooparmario1-1018-2.gif

[Nique]

http://i.imgur.com/GQAbQ.gif[/IMG]"]http://i.imgur.com/gJEU7.gif[/img]"]http://i606.photobucket.com/albums/tt148/fifthfiend/emoticons/fartztag.gif


I want a gif of this. (http://cheezburger.com/View/4569394432)

Because Slaters gonna slate.