I got a room in a house for really low rent, thought I was really lucky.

Anyway, the initial room mate was fine...to an extent, I sometimes found like whole rolls of paper towels missing and soda missing and such, but nothing big, I let stuff like that slide and just start keeping everything locked up in my bedroom that I can. He also had the annoying habit of sleeping on the couch downstairs with the TV at full blast (I used my fan to cover this up, as mentioned later in an other scenario). But the owner wanted to rent it out to at least four people since it had that many bedrooms, and the other two guys...okay, man, they had a lot of problems.

Girls over to the house. EVERY NIGHT. Keep in mind I had to get up early every day to go to college classes, and then to student teach, which was horrible enough without feeling tired as hell. This was annoying, to say the least. They would often show up at midnight too and make a shit load of noise, playing loud music and ping pong downstairs, bunch of stuff like that. But whatever, I had a fan so I turned that on, it cut the noise pretty good.

I rapidly discovered they were both slobs. Stuff would be left everywhere all the time, extremely dirty kitchen table, crumbs and food, that kind of thing, laundry all over it. Pretty damn annoying.

Turned out at least one them was a pothead, too, if not both. The pothead(s) was such a slob he'd actually leave marijuana leavings and ashes on surfaces like the table and such. Quite disgusting. But hey I'm getting such cheap rent, technically in PA I'm only responsible for what's in my room, that's what I rent. I'm technically not responsible for cleaning any public areas in the house, such as the bathroom, so I decide if they want to leave a huge mess and actually leave marijuana lying around it's their problem, I don't know about that shit, officer.

Anyway, one day the one I know is a pothead goes to an ATM to get 1400 dollars in cash to pay off a vehicle, leaves it in his unlocked room, and goes to his girlfriend's over night. It disappears, and the other roommate disappears with it and his stuff. So of course we know who stole it, but there's no hard evidence, it's just circumstantial. One of their girlfriend's may have stolen it, maybe there never was any cash. It's cash, it's not traceable. So anyway this idiot actually asks me if maybe I took it, and I'm like, "lol wut" and he goes "well you know it wouldn't be fair if I didn't ask everybody." Apparently I'm a stone cold genius who psychically knows when one room mate is going to coincidentally clear out all his stuff and hit the road and the other is going to leave 1400 lying around for me to steal, and I'm going to just pretend I don't know anything about it. Yeah, real logical.

So anyway I'm pretty sure the pothead is sort of gone...he's hardly ever there, I don't know if he leaves his stuff in that room still or not. The one who stole the cash is long gone, since it was something like his rent for a year at the price we were getting. So I'm left with the one guy who steals soda and watches TV all night. Joy.

Think of it this way: at least you don't have to deal with the other two.

Yeah, I kind of figured the one was going to kill the other one over it, but he high-tailed it out of there with the 1400 bucks. I'm not sure how stoned you have to be to leave that amount of cash lying around unprotected, but he managed it.

Never overestimate a stoner.

So Fitz, Nikose and I tackled the kitchen together. It was a 3 hour job. We cleaned it all up, but there's still a lingering smell- turns out at the bottom of the recycling pile, somebody had left a box of lettuce, just a crack open.

It had, err, composted, so to speak. That crate is sitting in the bathtub because nobody knows how to get rid of it without it being a biohazard.

gg
 

Whelp this vegetable matter is completely rotten and possibly hazardous, let's put it in the place where we clean ourselves for a while.

If you've known Nikose for this long and haven't figured out he's an idiot...

He's been living upstairs with us the last few weeks- he even has his own bedroom up here. He just didn't stay in his own place for a long while. Kind of emotionally bagging to be around what you thought was a good friend who ditched you in favor of a woman- he's still finding Ex-Roommate's things lying around.

Nik keeps his bathroom cleaner then any of us, too, which I've always found odd. He cleans it daily. Why the hell would he put rotting food in a plastic container in the bathtub?

I am experiencing that unique joy of having a bad roommate who also happens to be family.

My sister is being kind enough to rent out a couple of rooms in the basement of her house. Since I am not pulling in much money, she is only charging me $100 a month, and 1/3 of the utilities. Not a bad deal any way you look at it.

Alas, my sister is married so I have to deal with my brother in law. And it is annoying enough that I am seriously wondering if it worth it to stay here.

Where to start...


He has yelled at me a number of times because I wasn't cleaning the messes he was kind enough to leave there so I could do something nice for him and clean up after him. Ahead and read that again, I'll wait.


He is currently unemployed...not because he got layed off or can't hold a job, but because he chooses not to. He claims he is too busy "fighting the man" to work. By "fighting the man", he means having a spat with the school he went to over money. He has been at this for a least 6 months, with no progress made. Seeming as in those six months he has had three meetings, you can see how with that blistering pace of hard work he couldn't possibly have at least a part-time job. So, instead, he is living off of my sister, including a trip to the Caymans my family went on a few months ago. I chose not to go, because I didn't want to make someone else pay my way.


While he is doing this, he is basically accusing me of being a leech because of the low rent is sister is charging me. True, I only pay my sister $150 to $200 dollars a month, but well...that's in comparison to the $0 my brother-in-law brings in a month. Draw your own conclusions.

The guy has a temper. No, seriously. When he was at the store or something once, a guy was driving fast through the parking lot, so by brother-in-law pulled out in front of him blocking the other guy off, got out of his car and tried to pull the other guy out of his car so he could, and I quote, "teach him a lesson." Apparently he considers the other guy "a pussy" because he locked his car door. Major pet peeves include bad drivers and people who talk back. Keep those in mind.

He has an overly developed problem with authority. That's the only way I can think of phrasing it, but it just doesn't do it justice. He believes a goodly number of government conspiracies (not quite Truther level, but close). For example, remember when that guy flew his airplane into a IRS office, killing someone? While brother-in-law didn't say the guy was in the right per se, he did use the opportunity to compare IRS office workers to Nazi concentration camp guards. "They're were all just doing their jobs, right?"

What is most stupefying about the above two is that the man's goal in life is to be a a high school math teacher. I mean, he basically wants to put himself in a place where he'll have to deal with people in authority over him and a regular basis, as well as deal with high school drivers and of course, there will be at least a handful of students who talk back to him. In all honestly, I have a hard time picturing a scenario were this will end well. The best case scenario I can see is him getting fired, the worst case scenario is him trying to teach a student "a lesson", and getting charged with assault.

I want to be out of here before that comes to past. Otherwise he'll probably accuse me of being a leech because I didn't front lawyer costs for him.

'Cause free rides are pretty awesome.
 

Yeah, that dude sounds like a douche.

On the other hand... is your sister cute, and can you give me a ring when the inevitable divorce hits?