Terrible things that should never see the light of day, revisited.
 

When this thread came out I had a lot of fun coming up with truely horrible ideas to inflict on the general population. I was very disappointed when the thread died, so I am bringing it back to life with a doozy:

Star Wars, Origins: Jar Jar Binks

Top that if you dare. :dance:

This thread topic.

The Erotic Adventures of Fenris

SMB/Adam Smith Hurt/Comfort slashfiction.

Dissidia: Alternate Dimensions - Join your all-time favorite characters in a parallel game to the popular Dissidia franchise!

Warriors of Boko:
- Matoya
- Gordon
- Cid Haze
- Edward Chris von Muir
- Krile Mayer Baldesion
- Umaro
- Cait Sith
- Selphie Tilmett
- Quina Quen
- Wakka
- Penelo
- Snow Villiers


Warriors of Bebuzzu:
- Astos
- Count Borghen
- Gutsco
- Baigan
- Siren
- The Dream Stooges
- Palmer
- Biggs and Wedge NORG
- Brahne Raza Alexandros XVI
- Brother
- Gramis Gana Solidor
- Hope Estheim

Blues, any game where you get to play as Biggs and Wedge defaults to awesome.

Danny McBride as The Doctor in an American spin-off.

Better? :P

Demolition man 2: Quest for the fourth seashell

Robocop vs Magneto

Kane 2: Headlines from the grave

Bladerunner 2: How do you spell love in binary?

What do you mean that wasn't a real question?
 

01101100011011110111011001100101

Core 2: Core in Space

Unless you were just thinking of movies and stuff
 

A gamma laser, using a wavelength less than 10 picometers rather than harmless visible light.

I call it "cancer laser".

It was only a matter of time
 

If by bad idea you mean fantastically useful idea then yes.

And most lasers don't use visible light, they use UV or IR or Xray. I'm pretty sure the Xray lasers we already have would give you cancer hard out. BUt so would half the chemicals in any chemistry departent. I'm not sure whether we should judge inventions by propensity to cause cancer if mishandled

Theory that Bohemian Rhapsody is about soccer. Or for sake of being more specific, about how one player gets a red card from refereer and is taken out of the game and how he feels that this may mean that his team will lose.

'Killed a man' meaning why the player got red card, and even before notice how 'Caught in a landslide/No escape from reality' is clever usage of symbolism to mean that you can't break game's rules.

Now the operatic part is, naturally, about how the player starts to question referee's judgment.

The rocking part is about screaming to referee that he 'can stone me and spit in my eye', meaning the referee did wrong choice and how the player must 'Just gotta get out - just gotta get right outta here'.

And the final phrase? 'Anyway the wind blows.' The game will continue. But the player is worried how it will go when he's not playing it.

Now take in account that We are champions is stated to be about football victory, We will rock you is also very nice choice to sing before the game, and that nobody will ever know what Bohemian Rhapsody was about until this day, I think my theory is 100% right.

Obviously in my world the primary use for lasers is anti-personnel weaponry, and the only thing stopping mad scientists from enslaving the world with ray guns is the fact they're not actually efficient as anti-personnel weaponry.

But anyway I didn't know we already had invisible lasers. That's quite interesting.

I prefer my theory from 2007 that it's about me murdering Melfice.*Reference.

Pretty much all the useful lasers are invisible. If you see a visible laser it's quite likely they have put a visible laser along the same path for aligning purposes/hey don't walk into my laser.

The theory that "James Bond" is a code name, rather than one man. This explains the wildly varying personalities displayed by James in the many different books and movies which feature him, and why his age flies up and down more than the panties of an indecisive hooker.


Also: Spiders. Because they're spiders, and spiders are scary.

Very good stuff so far.

Romantic fan fiction: Kefka loves Ultimecia (because villains have feelings too)

God of War IV.

e: Hell, God of War III for that matter.

All secondary power rerouted to Flame Shield.
 

My Little Pony.

*GASP!*

http://i262.photobucket.com/albums/i...italcannon.jpg

OT;

Erm, I duno, maybe some sort of romance novel set in the 40k verse? Between an Ork and an Eldar. I know that'd scare the shit out of me!

isn't an orbital friendship cannon more a carebear thing? Been too long to be sure, and managed to evade MLP as well xP

The Walkertexasdruid Show (a cross between Glen Beck and John Stewart, now that is scary!). Any network that is willing to give me a show should be put down before it hurts itself or other people. ;-)

Final Fantasy XIII: Director's Extended Cut with endless commentary (that you cannot turn off).

And no English track.

Shadow of the Colossus directed by Michael Bay starring Shia Labeouf and Megan Fox. Agro will be replaced by a talking cow.

But then you can't understand the director when he says "And I had to absolutely go with this cutscene because it makes total sense." or "I was so impressed with the characterization of the villian, that I gave the guy who came up with that a hefty raise." or even worse "I still think the Eidelons are overpowered, and I swear the entire enemy development team insisted on them being even more powerful to make them 'worthwhile to use'."

Thadius before his morning cup pot of coffee.

Soooo.... pretty much the plot of the Peter Sellers movie "Casino Royale", then?

I HATE YOU :mad:

Nuklear Power Smackdown: Trolls vs. Mods

I mean it's kind of difficult to lose when you can just ban everyone.
 

Imposing a time limit of no more than two weeks makes it more interesting, though. :P

What about trolls that also have modhood? Do they count as trolls or as mods?

Dude have you seen our mods? They are all gigantic trolls! There IS no difference between the two.

You probably have a point there, which is why it would be a terrible idea.

Here is a terrible idea that actually exists: Football at Hiram College (where I went to school). They are at the bottom of Division 3. In fact I do not know if they have won a game since I graduated. Hence the reason I am an Ohio State fan. Which brings us to another terrible idea that happened: Who the heck trades memorabilia from bowl games (which they should have known that it was against the rules) for a tatoo? Then the supposedly stand-up coach covers up the idiotic incident. There was a whole bunch of stupidity to go around. :crying:

DING DING DING! I think we've got a new addition to the list!

The preponderance of NCAA Div 1 football.

That is why mods vs trolls is so perfect. All of the mods will start punching themselves and/or each other.

You fell down the stairs, isn't that right, Meister?
 

"Start"?

A crossover between 4chan and NPF.

...oh wait.

I thought NPF was the crossover of 4chan and NPF . . .

Metal Gear Solid: The Movie directed by Darren Arrenofsky starring Robert Pattinson and Christian Bale. Bale is Snake and Pattinson is Raiden. The movie is based entirely on Metal Gear Solid 2. Most of the runtime is taken up with Codec conversations.

It's recursive?
 

Before I address this statement, think about what you wrote here.

It's just one of those paradox things that you shouldn't think too hard about, synk.

It actually makes sense. I can see certain members as certain boards.

Wonder which board fifth is...

And I'm that shitty Gaia knock-off that Rai linked way back in the day.
 

Gaia Online.

No he's p. much got it.

Cutesy 80's Cartoon Deathmatch, featuring:

The Carebears vs. My Little Pony

Rainbow Bright vs. Strawberry Shortcake

No, look, this is a fact.
 

This is also a fact.
 

He just did.

Sometimes the one side of my brain sits on the other and doesn't let it enjoy life.
 

My relevant degree in mixology tells me that a can indeed mean a+b. Derrida, something something quantum physics.

Like Gilgamesh was one third mortal, two thirds divine and a third Gilgamesh.

What if B is zero. Or A is infinite and B is finite. Or I work in a scaling base A.
totally works.

One thing I've learned to never question is the assertion that one person's logic may not gel with another's, but there is always some crazy ass math to back it up.

a can indeed equal a+b, for extremely low quantities of b.

A+B=A but only when you are not looking at it.

Algebra:
A + B = A
Subtract A
B = 0

So basically Aldurin just called 4chan nothing, mathematically.

Sounds about right.

And it only took us two pages to come reach that conclusion.

If 4chan equals nothing then I have not missed anything, have I?

Nothing of any value or substance.

Yeah, there's really nothing to add there. You would not believe the enormity of the nothing you are not missing out on. That particular imageboard is the deadest, emptiest, most unpopular thing on the interwebs, and not going there is totally and completely beneficial to the well being of your soul.

You can imagine steam coming out of my ears if you'd like. It's not, but it's funny.
 

Words are symbolic representation of things, however. Things that we can model with maths by assigning numeric values. Same as Peanuts+Nothing=Peanuts

at least it has good wallpaper threads
 

If this was true, you folks here [and nearly anywhere on the Internet, I guess] wouldn't bring it up all the time.

I'm just sayin
 

Orange juice is made out of sugar, water, other additives, and orange juice. Provided you aren't squeezing your own (and not adding even water to it).

Now I want to label this forum "NPF: From Concentrate."

I have nothing against 4chan. Of course I have not seen it yet. Can we think of other terrible things now? I got another one:

Harry Potter and the Forgotten Victim: Cedric Diggery (who is now Edward from the Twilight series) seeks revenge on Harry by biting Ginny (making her a vampire).

It makes you wonder, what if the water and sugar had not been added? What must pure concentrated NPF be like? I would suggest that there be monsters there.

I reckon it'd be boring as shit

I never actually expected an explanation for that logic, I just completely abandon rationality when doing so seems the most logical action at the given moment.

Also an explanation: Infinity+(amount)=Infinity. I'll come up with an explanation of the explanation later.

Just cause they're allowed to market that concoction as orange juice under whatever passes for consumer rights legislation over at your place doesn't turn it back to orange juice you know.

(Over here you need a minimum of 96% fruit juice content to use the word "juice" in your drink's brand name or advertising.)

(I like my country.)

Which would mean orange juice + something else = orange juice.

Well, there's no orange juice actually called "orange juice" that I know of*. They'll say things like "Good Morning 98% orange juice" on the box. The point is that juice + additives =/= plain juice.

It's more like orange juice + something else = orange juice' (o.j. prime).

As the juice that is added to the something else is not the exact same as the juice that is produced.

But we still give it the same name which is pretty much the point. It's the same as lots of other food ingredients. you buy a chocolate bar- it's not all chocolate. You go buy some milk, it's not all milk.
But it's an acceptable use of the term, and indeed standard practice, to call "orange juice+sugar+additivies" juist "orange juice".

I never suggested it was.

I mean, if we actually wanted to take this as more than a one-shot bit of absurdist humour, you can strip away all the components of NPF out and still have an NPF as long as the server still exists. That would be a forum in its basest form. Everyone brings their toys and games, and all the places they've been into the mix and the community evolves or breaks down, but it's still NPF. If there's a point at which you've add enough other things that it stops being NPF, it's when the community realises they've become a different place and decides to change the name. Which makes it rather arbitrary, since you could pick any spot in a forum's existence and reasonably do this, but language IS arbitrary. The name becomes what we mean and we become what the name means. Hell, the only reason Nuklear Power Forum is particularly definitive of this place is because we keep using it as a title. What percentage of threads made in the last year are even about Nuklear Power?

I think the fact that language has become so central to humanity has given us the odd little delusion that words equal objective truths. That's particularly troubling when it comes to the names of things.

Back on topic
 

This argument over what constitutes orange juice.

Oh look.

Also pretty contrary to most current linguistic theories which generally treat words as abstractions/symbols/pointers.

A far more relevant question is, however: If I colour orange juice blue is it still orange juice
I'm thinking no. It is clearly blue juice.