Caption that I would put underneath the picture:

"Barry Bond's Trainer"

Nope, I changed my mind. You get Twonkies instead.



That '70s Show Reference

"Another perfectly normal, zombie-free day in the Umbrella Corporation..."

"I've finally discovered a cure for seeing floating legal terms!"

What? You think this is for you? Sorry to give you false hope but this is for the guy in the bed next to you. He actually has a chance. You, my friend, are fucked.

Win, just pure and simple win is what this post is

"Hold on a second Doc, what was that just now about my urethra?"

"Um, nurse??? Is that my fucking anestesia yet?"
"Nope. Euthenasia."
"Good. Wait, what?"

We are sorry, but in an attempt to get ahead of Michael Eisner, Donald Trump, and Paris Hilton, Ted Turner has copywrighted/tradmarked any and all catchphrases related to any property that is owned by a company that he owns. So, to use the phrase "Helloooo, Nurse!", please send a royalty check to:
Ted Turner (c/o Royalties)
One CNN Center
Atlanta, GA 30303
The dangers of mixing corporations and greed.

From her perspective, a mind expanding revelation about the whole of reality being a copywritten commodity, bought and sold by the greed-driven corporate machine, man!

From her patient's perspective, she stared at that needle for three fucking hours.

"This'll teach the bastard about pinching my ass and making lewd comments about 'examining' me in the janitor's closet."

Death By Stabbing is the winner. Bravefencer is runner up.

Here you go kids
have fun

YOU PARKED IN MY SPACE!!! I'LL KILL YOU!!!

Title™
 

NO WAI

What Krylo in a skirt yields.

"See, that sign right there. The one that says 'No Pointing at the Sign. Violators will be sodo...'"

Edit: Even better:

"No, sir, up yours. All the way up yours."

And he was never happy again.
Yeah, I got nothing. Nothing but those three(!) (super secret hidden) links.

"This guy found himself hours late to Thriller. He blames it on his lead coffin."

You can run, but you can't hide, bitch!

Irritable Bowel Syndrome rears its ugly head.

"FOOLISH HUMANS! WE WILL FEAST UPON OUR SOOOOOULS! DEAD BY DAWN! DEAD BY DAAAAAAAAAWN!!!"

"GET BACK HERE WITH MY DENTURES YOU SORRY SON OF A MOTHERFUCKING BITCH!!!!"

Ready..... aim...... SNEEZE!!

FUUUUUCCCCKKKK...

YYYYOOOOUUUU!!!!

PULL MY FINGER NOW!

Its the DEVIL, run!!

DEAR GOD! O'DONELLE(sp?) IS HUNGRY! RUUUU-*gets eaten*

Yeah, I'm dead for creativity at the moment.

*Grope!*

Lots of good ones: Crazy Ben's second one...if only he had gotten rid of the first...he might have won, October Raven, Major Blood gets runner up,Squishy cheeks, and finally Fencer's freaked me out...

But Mesden gets the win. Even Donald Sutherland is scared of Krylo in a skirt

Everyone's seen this before, but I'm lazy and I demand someone to make this funnier than before!


http://img513.imageshack.us/img513/4578/sammichyw4.jpg

Fat guy: Oh, YEEEEEERRR!!!
Me: Git, fat boy! I'm starvin'!

Where Are They Now: The Stay Puft Marshmallow Man

"You can't eat all those hambugers...he's gonna do it...he's gonna eat the hamburgers."

I'd gladly pay you tuesday for a hamburger today!

Using clever camera angles and the worlds chubbiest midget paved the way for whole new avenues of extreme advertising.

Despite appearances, this man is not preparing to devour an extremely large hamburger. The sandwich, nicknamed Athenaburger, is actually depicted moments after being spawned whole from the man's head. Scientists, baffled, are calling the occurence "burgogenesis."

"Yeah, those were great times," Bigass Hamburger Guy reminisces, "Life was good, there were hamburgers as far as the eye could see, and I even had my own unlimited supply of specially-made fat guy chairs. But then my fifteen minutes of fame ran out, and the last job I had was as the user pic for this jerk name 'POS Industries' over a year ago. I wound up on the street, so broke that I couldn't even afford a burger from White Castle, and then I found Jesus...

...Jesus Rodriguez, my dealer. Thanks to him, I lost over 300 lbs, and so can you! Act now, and you'll get the first fix free! Limited time only! Not sold in stores!"

We got laughs from coast to coast to make you smile. A real life look at each of you to capture all that style. You're the red, white, and blue; all the funny things you do... America, America this is you.

Stories from your friends next door they never told. You might be a star tonight, so let the camera roll! You're the red, white, and blue; all the funny things you do! America, America, this is you!
The dangers of mixing Americana

Noone must ever know of our forbiddon love.
LittleKuriboh Quote for the win?

"The Super Ultra Deluxe Special Omega Jumbo Mighty Pickle Stack Burger; Don't bother me... I'm eating."

Brought to you by the Ultra Secret Special Super Omega menu from Carl's Jr.

Ten minutes after finishing the burger he died of cardiac arrest brought on by accute cholesterol poisoning.

Make mine "Sui-sized!"
If the burger doesn't kill him, the side salad will!

Reuben Stutter, American Idol season 2 winner, three months later after finding out that he was being outstaged by runner up Clay Aiken.

The only reason I eat this is to remove attention from the fact that I wear purple neck-jewellry, thilly.

The health film continued:
"And if a man does not regularly consume the cooked flesh of another living being, his hair grows long. He may start to wear sandals, support environmental causes, hug and kiss people in his family, cry freely, and talk about "feelings" and "being in touch with his emotions". His testicles may shrivel and fall off. In its terminal stages, the sufferer of Vegetarianism finally grows a fully formed vagina and dies."

I hate doing this sort of thing, but wow, this one deserves a win just for bringing humour to a weary and jaded soul.

I somewhat disagree. It's.. not even making me laugh at all.
It just really depends on what type of sense of humor you have, I suppose.

Mine! Mine! Mine! Mine! Mine!

As an "aspiring writer" or at least your title says you are...maybe you should be an aspiring reader and read the rules of this game...it's not called bitch about other people's captions. It's called the caption competition. and you have yet to contribute anything to the contest.

Not true, DBS:

Maybe everyone should learn to read a little more?

Alright well played...but the point still stands...this isn't the bitch people out about their captions thread

Oh, agreed. Everyone, including me, should shut up now and make room for the funny. Now!

SO wins.

Naming second and tertiary winners is useless, because SO will be here.

You might want to clarify. I mean, we all know who you mean, but you might want to point out clearly whether it was Satan's Onion or Shadow Otenaki.

And runners-up let us know who else was funny. You just don't want to name them so you can rob people of happiness. Admit it.

I am, indeed, here--if you want me to post a piccie, I can do that.

Go ahead. I'm pretty sure you were who whats-her-face was talking about.

Wheee! A picture shall be forthcoming shortly.

editola: In fact, a picture is forthcoming now! How 'bout that.

http://img301.imageshack.us/img301/2...ry75tu2.th.png

"The sash was a bit much, wasn't it?"

"Sash? No! I didn't even notice it until you mentioned it *coughtoolcough*"

"My plan is so cunning, it graduated with a degree in cunning, from Oxford."

Real men wear black.
And the flowing curls sir?
Shutup Baldrick.

Uh huh huh! We are ze Franch! Uhn huh huh!

Par le vous Francois?(You can kiss my French ass.)
Fromage du par le?(Ah, fuck you. And your mom.)

If anyone sees any reason these two should not be married, speak now or forever hold your peace.

"Ok English Parliment guy go left
Elton John go right
Pirate guy looking over Elton John's shoulder go straight
and I, Napoleon, Will go back to France using the reverse tunnel to go back to France. Let me know how it goes guys!"

(Near Right to Far Right) "Excuse me, Mr... Prince?"
(Far Left) "No now's he the Artist Formerly Known As Prince"
(Near Left) "No he stopped using that name a couple years ago."
Prince: "You're all wrong. My name is now Little Bunny Foo-Foo."

"Hello. I am Arnold J. Rimmer, and I'm dressed like Napolion. I do not know why, but DAMN I look good!"

"Of course sir. Might I suggest the anti-psychatric cocktail for you sir?"

Sir, I hate to tell you this, but I doubt the English will be afraid of your "Prissy Statue Golem" scheme. They already wear our clothes without question.

I always have a hard time choosing a winning caption. I mean, usually 'most all of 'em are pretty good!

Flare deserves an honorable mention for noting Chris Barrie's appearance both in this shot (from an episode of Blackadder the Third) and in Red Dwarf; greed and Squishy Cheeks also deserve mention for the Blackadder reference-making. Funka Genocide and wackodudle's captions also made me laugh, for mentions.

but CelesJessa's caption conjured up the most delightfully strange images, so this round is hers.

Shit, you should see her Flash cartoon.

PS: Celes pickin' the next picture? I estimate a ninety percent possibility of Mansex.

Heh, I didn't even know that was the same actor.

And I'm predicting that it'll be FMA softcore Yaoi.

sorry to be all off topic and whatnot, but that's going in the sig.

Oh yeah, I agree. :p :D

Also, yes!! I got a mention! That's like the best I've ever gotten. Boo-yah.

You know it'd be a lot more of a compliment the way people always quote me in their signatures if it it weren't always the quote about Mansex that they went for.

Something tells me you're avoiding the Quote Hunt thread for a while.

And I call next one if CJ never posts. I got a good one.

I call if you fall to an unfortunate accident. Speaking of Quote Hunt.