BM: How many hadokens does it take to get to the chocolatey centre of a tootsie pop?

Hehehe
 

BM: Mime this Red Mage, FIGHTERDOKEN!

Sarda: Yay verily, warriors of light, you have saved the world and blah blah blah, whatever. GET OFF MY LAWN!

Fighter: We're heroes, and we shall be remember as so for all time, Black Mage!

Thief: That's really funny, especially since he was on the team of Villains for the final battle....

Red Mage: But it was for naught! With all that xp, all that hard work, I finally transcended our game world.....to get caught in Final Fantasy 2! WHERE THERE IS NO EXPERIENCE! YE DICE, why have you forsaken me?

White Mage: All is well in the world, and I have completed my mission. I only hope that this victory will truly allow you to rest in peace, Black Belt.....

Black Belt: OH RLY?

White Mage: Black BElt, you live!

BM: What? You died! I watched you die, with a certain satisfaction I might add, and I could have sworn there was no way in HELL you were going to come back. Cuz I went to hell. I'd know if you were able to come back.

Thief: Hm.....since when did Black Belt speak in red?

Red Mage: Don't bother me now....I have lost my will to live....though I must admit, all this sulking gets progressively better the more I do it....

BB: Fools! I am not your pitiful Black Belt, for I am merely using his form to visit your pitiful realm! You may call me......Pyros BELT! Or maybe, Black Nine! or BB Nein! Whichever comes first!

Fighter: Wait........YOU"RE NOT Black Belt! IT'S SOMEONE WHO ONLY LOOKS LIKE BLACK BELT!

Black Mage: He just said that, Fight-Dork! Heh...Fight-Dork. Even after like, 5 years of adventuring, I've still got it!

Pyros Belt: Fight-Dork! THat's sheer brilliance! YOU! BLACK, MAGEY PERSON! Truly, only one with wit such as yours MUST be the true ruler of this land!

Fighter: Actually he' n-

Thief: *grabs Fighter and hurls him into the distance* Yes, yes, he is truly the owner of this land, and I am his personal advisor and manager of the treasury, war department, and anything else that can fool you. Here's my card.

Pyros: *reads card* Okay, seems legit. Now, I ask that you surrender your land to me, lest I stop being able to fight off these combatitive impulses flooding my body, urging me to punch all of you till you can't think thinky thoughts.

BM: Umm....sure? This land, that I own, I can totally give it to you-

Thief: *picks up Black Mage and hurls him into the distance* -At a cost!

Black Nine: Umm....did you just grab your ruler and hurl him into the sunset, like that other guy?

Thief: It's a cultural thing. He was late for a ruling appointment, and I politely threw him there.

BB Nein: Well...sounds reasonable. What is this cost and why shouldn't I crush you in between these thighs I wish I had in my actual body! HYAH!

Thief: Well, all you need to do is sign this piece of paper that clearly states (you don't need to bother reading it) that you will give this land a dollar to prove your ownership. Then this land is as good as yours!

Kung Fu P9: Ha! If only every other land had terms of surrender like these! Oh drat....it seems like I forgot to bring any dollars on this particular takeover. All I've got is this insanely large amount of spare gold that I use to wipe my ass.

Thief: We will just hope that that will do. Um....were you telling the truth about the wiping?

Ryu the Gangsta Ninja: Well, yes. Of course, being a divine being possessing a dead kung fu monk, my crap tends to take the form of perfect diamonds worth exactly $7,777,777,777.

Thief: I think my heart just exploded. Any chance you'll need an advisor for your ruling?

HYAH!: Probably...NOT! *Grabs Thief and hurls him into the distance*

Thief: Hmm....so this is what it's like.

Nein: *Gives Red Mage a stare.*

Red Mage: Oh...yeah...fine. I'll go. If I get any better at sulking, I might gain the ability to sulk enough tears to drown the world or something....*mimes the throw ability, and throws self into the distance*

Pyros Belt: Well, with that task done, it's time to do some Rulin! KARATE KICK!

Sarda: Hey! I thought I said get off my lawn!

Pyros: No Old man. How about you get off MY LAWN!

*world explodes*

Ok, moving on..

"Taking care of the Light Warrior Pets"

"So Fighter has a pet sword. And... he's paying you 500gp a day to sit it?"

Me-"Yes"

"Should have guessed that...."

man1: does thief have a pet?
me: no, hes paying me to watch his lawyer ninjas

So, BM, how did you talk Hades into selling you Cerberus?

*BM explains*

Oh...

Well, that explains why all hell has broken loose...

Yes, Red Mage. I will take care of mister boots... Yes, Red Mage, I will make sure I preen and fluff his hair... Yes, Red Mage, I will put the little pink ribbons in... Yes, Red Mage...

RM: I have to walk my dog three times a day to keep up his Strength stat. Then I have to feed him only +5/5 Dog Food of Awesomeness, otherwise his Charisma stat goes down.