Commercials that fail
 

So I don't know if you've seen these Comcast Digital Voice commercials, but I guess Comcast is doing internet telephone service and they're doing it with these commercials where weird crazy people call other people and expect their weird crazy statements to make sense to the people they're calling, because they're calling using Comcast Digital Voice. But - here's the hook - they dont! So the person on the other line sits there being like "dude, you're a crazy person."

I mean it's actually kind of a funny gimmick, it's just that it occurred to me that watching these things leaves me with no interest whatsoever in using Comcast's internet phone service. In fact if Comcast offered it to me for free, I'd probably think of the commercials with the crazy people using their service, and be like "what, you mean that phone service that crazy people use?" and tell Comcast fuck no, I don't want your crazy-people phone service.

So I thought this could be a thread.

To make it clear, this isn't a thread just for like, bad commercials, cause god knows those Mentos commercials from back forever ago were like being punched in the face with awful, yet still somehow made you want to buy fucking Mentos. So this thread is more just about commercials that for whatever reason utterly fail to make you want to have anything to do with the product they're supposedly trying to sell.

Fifth, the only thing here that is failure is you with your fancy red text. =P

In seriousness, it is Tim Hortons commercials. They make anyone who east their food into mindless retarded morons. I absolutely cannot stand those commercials.

That one commercial where all they say is "Apply directly to the forehead."

I can't even remember what the product is - but I know I'm not going anywhere near that stuff.

I think the Mentos commercial succeeds simply because it brainwashes you with horribly catchy song. I know whenever I hear it it means that I need to go get Mentos as soon as possible.

The Ps3 Ads

just because someone else will say it

Because Bellsouth reminded me...

Those PSP ads with the rodents. You know, these ones. I'm not sure how they were supposed to get anyone to want to buy a PSP, but I know there's no way in hell I'd want to associate with anyone who was influenced by those.

The Skwirrulz, the fucking fake-graffitti, the "I want a PSP for Christmas" shenannigans, is there anything Sony has done to sell its videogames-related products in recent memory that hasn't been a travesty?

As I have mentioned before, I HATE reeses commercials with a loathing.

CHOKE ON YOUR DAMNED HEDONISTIC CUPS OF PEANUT BUTTER AND CHOCOLATE!

Furthermore, I can't stand the dollar menunaire McDonald's commericals, especially the one that came with Far Cry. Hardee's too.

And anything by the Oxyclean guy. I bet he talks like that everywhere, and people hate him. Like I do.

Sure fine you hate them, but you can't deny that they at least make Reeses' Peanut Butter Cups look like a worthwhile product.

I actually hate those Nutrigrain bar commercials, but this is amusing for some reason.

That Oreo Pizza commercial is kinda bad too. I mean, I like oreos, and I like pizza, but seeing it smeared across someone's face doesn't look that appetizing.

I hate Countrywide Insurance commercials. They always get creepy looking people to get as close to the camera as possible and I find them very annoying.


Also-- The Art Instruction Schools ads. The man has no soul. Seriously. He's got this weird Jimmy Stewart-ish accent and no personality and he's gonna send you this FREE brochure so that if you can draw Timmy the Turtle you can learn to improve your art skills and airbrush pictures of purple antique cars on a beach in a purple sunset. Hate.