Jadarendir uses the staff to create some cheesy lens flares and kewl special effects, just to make everything look awesome, when it actually made it look more like "Dance Dance Revolution".

The Bobs look at each other questionably, then said in unison, "Sure", and offer the res tof their stash to the Jadarendirs.

They then started playing a sweet disco tune on their guitars as the scene around them went nuts.

SAAM desides to get back on topic while speling horibly.

SAAM steals the calvinball with a *YOINK*, the YOINK of which had never been seen before!

(thanx to bob for the catch phrase)

(no prob :D )

The Bobs looked up from their little siesta and saw SAAM running with the calvinball. Bob #1 stood and aimed with his shotgun at the moving figure. Still drunk, he stumbled and shot, missing completely and hitting a donkey. Seeing he missed, he sat back down and resumed drinking.

Both Jadarendirs were also drunk by now, so the first used his staff to create a super-powerful being to completely DESTROY the possessor of the calvinball!

But he messed up the spell, so he got fighter instead. :fighter:

"Go... get'im... and bring the ball b'ck... (hic) here."

"Yar!" Fighter sprang into action!

what Fighter didn't know was that SAAM was the ultimate and supreme master of the "Yar! Spear," shoving the calvinball into a pocket demension found in his SAAW, he leaped at Fighter, spearing him in mid air with a loud "YAR!.

And then fighter hacked him to pieces in midair.

Then he brought the Calvinball back to Jadarendir. :D

Me: Root Beer
Others: Muddy water

what fighter didn't know was that was only the SAAM clone, the real SAAM had the Calvinball and was already beside Jadarendir, sharing cheetos.

Me: Arachnadude
others: the Sulk

The drunken Jadarendir took the cheetos, while his sober clone stole the calvinball right out of SAAM's pocket!

however, the pocked was a pocked Dimension, so the sobre Jadarendir was sucked into the pocket, along with the Calvinball, a computer hard drive, and a chapter of the Shriners.

anyway, he was sharing cheetos, and didn't care much about the Calvinball.

"Granted"

OOC: little too late, MM... Spirit's dead. And so are you. Scorpions, spiders, and puffins are now laying eggs in your rotting corpse that is laying at the bottom of the hole that USED to be Spirit.

Anyway, I take a break from eating cheetos to become sober (that was easy!) and then use my staff to summon an invincible army of Minirendirs (over 200,000 strong) and, by accident, a smaller invincible army (10,000 strong) of MiniSAAMs. Lucky we're allies, huh?

Me: Black Mage x 200,000
SAAM: Red Mage x 10,000
Others: God x 0

"Umm,dude I have a clone and plus why are going after me. I turned you into a cokroach becuse you woke me from my nap. If your going to be this way im going to have to break your staff. Oh, also that portal to hell alot of things crawled out of it."

*MM broke Jads staff and then shreded it into tiny peices of wood. Then MM cast infanate auto-life on him self. Then right behind jad was the lord of chaos.Then the lord of chaos pulled him in the portal with himself.Then the portal closed.*

"Oh,SAMM just to tell you theres a mountian of cheetos right behind you."

Jad: Disqalified for being in hell
Me:won the game

"Oh,and Jad stop trying to kill me its geting annoying."

BOOYA! by the way, I was referring to the Spirit that went through the portal and is in another plane of existance right now Jad. so technically MM was right and Spirit is being horribly gang stabbed right now, no matter where he is now.


SAAM saw the closed portal and summoned the Resurrected Kool Aid man.

"there's a thirsty Chaos on the other side of that portal." SAAM said.

and with that, the Kool Aid man smashed through the portal, allowing SAAM to travel through and join Jadarendir and Chaos in their game of Poker, bringing cheetos along and using the Kool Aid man's juicy innards as refreshment.

please note that I still have the Calvinball, and as such, MM couldn't have won the game.

"IAS had come out of the portal from hell an hour ago and was inviz so no one could see him but now he is not inviz anymore so evryone can see how hell has changed him. He's realy tall and has a special hella cool knife that
makes him Invincible and can grant wishes"
"IAS shouts hey everyone im back from hell hows it been? i got this cool knify thingy that can do anything even bring back uber magik staffs that were broken. anyone want an alience???"

OOC: My friend, I can't wait to prove you wrong.

#1: You CAN-NOT break the staff. It's Godly. Unbreakable. Invincible. Therefore making me, its possessor, invincible with it.

#2: The staff is NOT made of wood; it is non-material.

#3: I killed you twice, as a joke. You can come back anytime you want. Don't take it personally

I hereby declare myself BACK in the game.

ooc. Bob Do yourself a favor Kill the thread. Jady whats his face.
#1 If it has Godslaying on it it kills Godly weapons as well.
#2 Find a girl. Fast.
#3 its a little hard to deal out death when your not the GM.
#4 you cannot declare anyone either in or out of a game. even a god moding o
SAAM Try Cheese poofs.

OOC:
#1: Godslaying? WTF are you goin on about??
#2: I HAVE a girl. Bitch.
#3: A GM can PERMENANTLY kill someone. I, however, kill them and then let them come back in and deal out whatever punishment they deem neccesary, and find a way to counter it.
#4: I was simply declaring that MM cannot declare ME out of the game. With that said, you are officially whipped.

SAAM tries cheese poofs, dislikes their taste and shoves them up Spirits ass. this causes Spirit to soil himself, covering his pants (/robes?) with brown and orange.

SAAM also hands a CHEETO!!!!!, to IAS.

"a cheeto is all the alliance I need buddy, join the cheesy side."

Ooc: nothing personal Spirit, just having a little fun.
also, its true, he does have a girlfriend.

1) Weapons that kill God's, usually meaning they kill immortal things. You just said the staff is Godly, making a god slaying weapon able to destroy it.
2) Talking about personal life things in a forum is the dumbest thing you can do, seeing as the only proof you have is the other persons words. And people are so trusting...
3) This is a joke/god modding thread. There is no GM. If there is, s/he is a dumbass for encounraging god modding then going "Nuh uh!".
4) Who cares what other people say? Just jump back in. Joke/god mod thread, no one cares.

ooc I guess I lighten up... But I do Jadaradenier Or whatever is a little control freakish for a joke thread..

OOC: He didn't say anything about Godslaying in his post where he destroyed my staff. But thank you, IHMN. :)

Back in "reality"...

Jadarendir takes his staff and recalls his army, because he is bored. He stands ready for any onslaught. He also offers a cheeto to SAAM, in honour of their alliegance.

Also, I hereby declare my staff completely invincible to any and all attacks. As well as my army and schlong.

The two Bobs awoke from their drunken state to find themselves going two-on-two with SAAM, Jada, and their entire army. "This is gonna be a long day." Both Bobs withdrew their lightsa...oh yeah, already used them. They instead got out their shotguns once again and stood at the ready. "Been nice knowin ya, Bob."

Suddenly, Martyr returns. Having only read the most recent post, and being so absent, his perspective is that clone Bobs are facing off against allied SAAM and a seemingly invincible Jadarendir.

The voice in the back of Martyr's head speaks clearly to him, "Say no to drugs."

Martyr tilts back his head, lightning strikes above,and the flash enlightens the area around him. The brilliant light showing his skin as though it's pigment was lost, and Martyr was merely another slain on the battlefield. Cadavorous, if you will.

But Martyr was very much alive, and his goal was defined. He would settle this once for all!

"Say no to drugs"

Martyr screeched into the ever blackening night! The earth tore itself apart and the heavens revealed a show of fire and falling magma. Only he knew how magma could exist in the air, but this could not have been mistaken for lava on any day of the week. The winds picked up to hundreds of miles an hour, muratic acid rained from the shapely clouds. The clouds were becoming sexier by the second. Martyr shouted at the top of his lungs. He shouted at the top of the lungs of a thousand Kid Rocks, he shouted, "NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! !!"

Yet his mortal words could not stop the inevitable. His power had reached far beyond his own mind. His world had become the real world. And like guillotine, the ravaged world of Martyr's living nightmare fell upon the battlefield.

*Martyr Suddenly Does Not Die*

*claps*

Both Bobs suddenly froze and shot a look behind them. Another man had entered the battlefield through the use of a spectacular entrance, the melodrama of which had never been seen before.

This Requires Firestorm Secret In Entrance Technique Number Seven! (Dramatic Lens Flare.)
SHINING INSANITY! The Dramatic Entrance and Exit!

"All the words are gonna bleed from me and I will sing No more!" And the sound was heard amongst the chaos. A sound of which was never heard before and shall never be heard again. Then an electic guitar was heard. It sound was that of the fury or Page the grace of Clapton and the sheer iron will of Hendrix came through all of it.

A flash of light and a chord of E sharp. From te distance it could be heard. With all the power that all the Gods of guitar have never seen. The tune was from The very binding of the Universe's SuperStrings the stuff that makes and kills Gods.

Then Jadarendir fell. Smote by the sound and thourghly destroyed Disentegrated and Obliterated. The sound Of Stairway to Heaven Played, and the Air turned into sound and the armies fell...Leaving SAAM Martyr IAMSuperior And Bob to hear the next chords of Desperatley Wanting And soon SAAM Saw that his Cheetos where against him and his heart broke while he died crying over his lost love. The tempo quickenend to that of Heart Full of Soul IamSuperior Realized all to soon that his was swept away in a flash of lightining and burst of light and was ionized. Martyr looked at the two Bobs until one fell from The Glorious Number One.

The sound could be felt to the very core of ones bones. It was not bad. It was actually quite good. Then Dream on was heard. Martyr's dream died with him as soon as it was over. Bob was alone. but the song still played. Then the Avatar of the music Showed himself.It was TheSpiritOfVengance.

The perfect instrument: A revived Spirit The Avatar of Vengance was intune with the rhythm of the universe itself. He Played as He walked up to Bob Playing what looked like A Doubleneck Gibson SG Made out of some foreign material but ineffable none the less. Then Sprit Stopped Playing after finishing. He handed the most powerful instrument in the universe to Bob. He walked a few feet away. "Use it Wisely..." Then A flash of light that spanned every across every dimension engulfed Spirit who was now gone forever more...(translation Final post on this thread.)

Me= Trancended Ascended Rezed Perfected and istrumented
Bob= Instumented
Rest=Deader than Jerry Garcia...