Help me help you help me to take your monies.
 

So, by popular demand, we're going to bring back individual Light Warrior T-shirts. I'd like to include new quotes on these, but I'm having trouble deciding on which quotes. Oh, the curse of being such a brilliant writer!

Hey, it's what I'm telling myself so I don't just look indecisive, shut up!

I thought about doing a poll, but with many choices for each of four characters, that'd just get stupid and unwieldy. But this is your opportunity to tell me what quotes you'd like to see on the shirts!

Couple guidlines...

1. Quotes that require a previous quote to make sense/be funny are right out.

2. Quotes that make no sense out of context are iffy. Usually, they're plain stupid, but sometimes that lack of context makes them better.

3. The "Help Me Find A Comic" thread and "Favorite Moment" thread might help you narrow down quotes you're thinking of but can't quite find on your own.

Thanks, everyone!

Not one of the main cast's lines but I've always gotten a kick out of "everything I love is combustible!"

Although it'd only really work on a shirt if you found a typeface that got across the pathetically helpless despair of the line.

"Why is it your brand of truth inevitably involves obfuscation and lies!" might work on a Thief shirt though there is the catch that it's RM who actually said it.

Yeah, that was RM.

Proving people wrong aside, I'd love to see a shirt of "Evolution is my bitch."

That was my favorite RM moment, the whole chocobo arc. How he seems to solve everything without problems for once...and then everything goes to hell.

Seconded. Also, a more obscure one for BM might be "Reap the whirlwind, elf." I just happen to like that, but I think we can do better. I'm currently browsing the archives.

I think it'd be neat to have a Red Mage T-shirt with "Chocobo Sex" written at the top and "The Greatest Victory" at the bottom. Or something like that. =p

Comic Link

"I'm a helper!" should totally be in fighter's shirt

Black Mage: "I am alone now for the first time, but not the last time. And definitely not the first time."

Thief: "We're Light Warriors. And Light Warriors get orbs of light. That's just the way it is. You can be alive or dead when it's done."

"Yeah, I got Nothing" -BM
Black Mage's note to the Onion Kid after he killed those people in the forest
"I am the Black Mage! I cast the spells that makes the people's fall down!"
"Missiledoken" -BM
"I don't think you've thought this through as much as you think you have." -BM
"That's not random at all!" -BM


"We've doubled out headbutting range!" -Fighter
"Sword-Chucks, yo." -Fighter
"I feel... crystal clear."
Any one of the mathematical theorems he spouted during smart mode
"Me-Doken" -Fighter
"Two Fisted Monkey Style Attack!" -Fighter
"Wheeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee!" -Fighter


"The important part is concentrating" -RM
"My sack!" -RM
"Fourth times the charm." -RM
"Also, I want to burn it with fire and never look back." -RM
"Show me anything that beats a natural twenty and I'll show you hateful LIES!" -RM
"Let's rip causality a new one." -RM
"It's too illogical to fail." -RM
"The fools! They have succeeded in only adding to my arrow inventory!" -RM


"Secretly I meant we'd be better off." -Thief
"Different Services" -Thief
"I stole it from the future." -Thief

for BM
I've got Black Magic, a hair trigger, and a short fuse, bring it!
It's what he would have wanted... if he was me.
What part of being stabbed do you not understand?
You don't know the kinds of persecution my people have had to endure for centuries! And all because of the color of our spells!
That's so stupid I can't even see straight anymore.
I am the black mage! I casts the spells that makes the peoples fall down!
Why, it would take some sort of insane megalomanical fiend to take pleasure in wielding the tapestry of creation to focus pure energy into reality through nothing more than my own will, the rush of electricity through my being, the power--my God, the power! IT'S THE ONLY TIME I FEEL ALIIIIIIIIIVE!
Your brain was pierced by a sharp stabbing implement. I was going to add to it today so that it didn't look like an accident.
I should have mention this at the beginning. I solve all my problems through violence.
I will laugh for a straight week when I finally kill you.
I see now that my incredible intellect must be aligned against this Ranger. I'm already forming a plan of such subtle genius that it will obliterate all Ranger-thinky-thoughts from White Mage's brain. While simultaneously opening her heart--and pants--to me, Black Mage!
Some people wrestle with their personal demons. I stabbed mine in the back of the head. He was a bleeder.
Why don't you go with Thief or something so I can let the neverending tide rage that I call "being awake" simmer down to a mere powder keg of fury.
Fighter
Them's M'Brain Meats.
If I had a reason for everything I did, I'd be crazy.
Sound has a color now.
Call me Spike fightwicky
And what a adventure i had! versions of my new friends kept appearing before my eyes. They could even swap heads,which where themselves independently sentient as well. It was a beautiful nightmare of the surreal
When captain America throws his shield, All those who oppose his shield must yield
Redmage
I know that and you know that, but I don't know that.
But he...You can't...Love.Hate.Clouds.
Show me something that beats a natural twenty and I'll show you hateful lies!
I'm prepared to passionately argue this point until nothing makes sense anymore. If that doesn't work, then the hours upon hours of whining will
My plans are always practical! It's the laws of physics that get in the way of my success.
Shut up, I'm a genius. My ways are inscrutable!
Cool kids? Are they going to pants me? Give me a wedgie? Make fun of my jeans? What is their obsession with pants! My bathing suit area is not for touching!
X marks the spot? That could mean anything!
what's wrong with being thorough? I ALWAYS go for the deepest probing action humanly possible.
That's why I'm here with my ginormous brain power and smarts!
It has exposed its weak fleshy underbelly to me in the form of its digestive tract!
ill give you more later if you wish

"The fools! They have only succeded in increasing my arrow inventory!" was always a favorite of mine. Kind of Iffy, but maybe if the picture on the shirt had an arrow in the hat?

I can assure you if there was a fighter shirt that said "I'm a helper!" I would purchase it.