OOC: Anybody besides me see where this fight in Monk's head is going? (HINT: Oldest trick in the final fight book)

BIC: Wolf turned a corner, on the wall no less, and found himself face-to face with the deranged Agent Thompson

"Oops, I did it again, Mr. MacKenzie" the agent blathered.

"Shut up." Wolf snarled as he lashed out with his fist. The agent, in his deranged state barely managed to block the attack, and fumbled for his Desert Eagle.

Moving like a human blur, Wolf brought up his katana, sliced the desert Eagle in half, ripped off the right sleeve of Thompson's black suitjacket, and then he caught Thompson in the head with a flying roundhouse kick. The agent fell off the wall and landed on the "real" floor two stairways below...incapacitated, but alive.

"Tell Mastermind there's a new Wolf in town...and he's got a bullet with his name on it." Wolf said to the inert agent as he picked up the torn sleeve and wrapped it around his head like a bandanna.

Paging Solid Snake... Wolf thought. He made another mark above the doorway in front of him, and he headed up the stiarway.

The Stairs and doors all looked the same, there was no telling how big the room really is.

______________________

The fairgrounds started up right, Merrygoround music could be heard, as well as the sounds of animals. However the tent was more or less empty.

_____________________

The management truck stood quiet and almost imposing, the pale old red paint, and dryrotting wood panels gave a weathered appearance. The seven soldiers flanked Jade and blocked her path except to move towards the management.

Jade sighed. She wasn't about to get in a fight with seven Coyote soldiers so she slowly made her way towards the trailer. She took a deep breath and knocked on the door.

Wraith runs headlong into a wall corner, smacking his head roughly on the wood. He stands stiff for a moment, then steps back from the wall, rubbing his sore face and trying to regain his sense of direction. He still doesn't know how he ended up here, but somewhere along the way he'd gotten separated, lost, and deposited in this nightmare of a funhouse, replete with animated talking chibi animals, hyper children, mirrors on the walls, and a vast office complex with flat white walls and nothing but hallways full of doors.

He shakes his head off and looks about dizzily, then hears an all-too-familiar sound approaching him from behind. At first it starts quietly but grows louder as it gets nearer, and soon it's easy to tell that it's a small child screaming, "Yaaaaaaaaaaaaaaayyy!"

He turns around with a look of horror on his face as he watches a little girl riding in a demented-looking, wildly souped-up go-cart rocketing towards him at top speed. She honks her horn and giggles, while he staggers to the side and falls over, narrowly avoiding her as she slams her cart straight into the wall, punching a big hole in it and going straight through the other side, still going fast. "Beep beep! Wheeee!" She exclaims.

"Dear God...I gotta get out of here..." He mutters as he scrambles to his feet.

Favoring a twisted ankle, he stumbles off down the corridor and enters a doorway, and ends up back in the same hallway, just coming out a different door. He looks around and picks another door, entering that one and coming out yet another doorway in the same hallway. He stops in the middle and looks left and right, then jumps in the air when he hears beeping and squealing, followed by the little girl rocketing out of a doorway down the hall, zooming right through the one opposite her and coming out yet another doorway further down the hallway.

He jumps again and sprints through the door ahead, then comes out another doorway down the hall. She also comes out one and enters the other across from her, while he dives through another doorway also. He ends up coming out another door in the middle, while she exits the door just to his left and zooms into the one opposite, screaming, "Hi! Bye!"

He jumps again and sprints through the door ahead, and ends up coming out another doorway with her right on his tail. "AHHHH!"

"Hiya!" She giggles.

He disappears through the door, as well as she, and when they both reappear again, he's chasing her.

She screams, "AHHH!"

While he yells, "Get back here!"

They fly through the doorway ahead again and wind up coming out another doorway further yet down the hall, this time she chasing him again. "Get away from me!"

"Heeheeheeheeheeheee!"

They each come back out their own doorway again, but she keeps going through the door ahead while he stops and stands in the middle of the hall, panting. "I don't know how much more I can take..."

Suddenly a chibi bunny Coyote hops on his shoulders. "Hello!"

"GAH!" He shouts while jumping. "Oh...well, you can't be much worse than-OW!"

She tugs on his long hair locks like she's riding a bicycle. "Vroom, vroom!"

"Get offa me, ya little bugger-OW!"

He spins in circles, trying to get her off him, when the go-cart Coyote comes screaming out of the door right in front of him. She squeals, he screams, but before she can slam her cart into him, he assumes his ghost form and she passes right through him, picking up one chibi bunny Coyote for the ride. They both squeal in delight and drive through the door behind him, leaving him to sigh and hang his head, relieved.

"YAY!"

He spins to his left and sees them coming out of a door from the end of the hallway, driving straight at him. He jumps to his feet again and starts running in the opposite direction, looking behind once or twice. "SOMEBODY HEEELP MEEEEE!"

"Jade come on down!" some weird retro trumpet music plays. "Your the next contestant on 'The Coyote is right.'" The door popped open revealing a blinding white light. The room inside was indeterminate.

Verry sorry to bother you all who know me from the first chapter it me Tymes Up charecter Dream came by to say hi no hope of rejoin but if anyone makes a RP as good as this pm me i would enjoy playing with you guys again those who dont know me sorry for interupting this "serious" battle.

OOC: I am quite aware that the doors and whatnots of the Escher room look the same, that's why I'm gouging identifying marks wherever I go. Also...Wraith gets the Industrial Hallway and I get stuck in Escherland? Man...

BIC: Although trying to remain optimistic, Wolf was starting to hate the Escher Room with a passion.

I could've waited for things to sort themselves out...BUT NOOOOO!!! I had to go to the wonderful world of M.C. Fucking Escher! I swear when I get out of here...

He was so deep in rage-filled thought that he almost didn't see Agent Johnson's right hook. Wolf ducked the punch and countered with a punch of his own. Johnson barely blocked it, leaving Wolf with a chance to drive his right fist into Johnson's gut. The agent tried to kick Wolf, but Wolf kicked off the wall and brought his katana in a sweeping arc that cut through Johnson's spine. Wolf had moved so fast, his trenchcoat hadn't stopped flapping even after he hit the ground. Wolf wasn't through though. Facing away from the agent, he thrust the katana backwards, drving it through the agent's back with enough force to have the tip poke out of his chest. Wolf withdrew his katana, and Johnson collapsed in a bloody heap on the floor.

Wolf looked up, and noticed another security camera. I guess Coyote saw that... Wolf frowned, then grinned maliciously.

He spoke directly at the camera. "I hope you saw that Coyote. You really should learn that if you want to take me out, you should send someone who wasn't addled by torture. And another thing; as much as I respect Jade's command authority, I've decided the peaceful solution is right out. You've pushed me too far. When I get out of here, which I will, I doubt that anything you throw at me will be able to stop me from getting to you."

Wolf drew one of his .45s. "From now on, I'm letting this do the talking."

Wolf took aim and blew the camera apart. He started walking again, marking the trail with his sword.

This is getting out of hand. Someone...anyone...please get me out of here.

Somewhere down below, the still-stunned Thompson moaned "I'm not a girl, not yet a woman."

Wolf shouted back "You're next if you don't shut the fuck up this instant!" and fired a warning shot with his other .45. Thompson went quiet.

(( That was just the first thing that came to my mind. I guess I don't have a knack for torture... ^^; ))

OOC: Actually, now that I reread it, I feel sorry for Wraith. It's like being attacked by coked-up chibi Agent Smiths

"You know he's rather bitter about running into those agents. It's not like I told him to go into the Escher room. Then again how could he have known the agents were being tortured in the escher room. Oh well. If he keeps being so rude I might turn the door scrambler on, or worse turn the stereo on. Looks like toxic is on the playlist for next."

"Has Jade come into the waiting room yet?"

"Not yet dad."

"Humans. You can put out a welcome mat, take them to the fair, even introduce them to the sweetest of your offspring, and they still don't trust you. I am depressed. Albert."

"Yes dad."

"Turn the stereo on."

ooc: MWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!