I'm not broke, just broken
 

So I got a phone call today from the hospital. I had X-rays taken a few days ago because I had an accident at work. It involved a handrail, a kickguard, and a bucket of test material for new injection moulded parts.... Long story short I have *3* broken ribs on my right side. Yeah... 3 of them. lol. It SUCKS so mightily, BUT I'm on some bitchin' pain killers.
This is officially the worst injury i've EVER accrued in my life

As soon as you aren't in any more pain, sell your painkillers to that guy at your workplace that always seems to be just waking up. From what I hear they go for quite a lot these days.

The worst I have ever had was two broken front teeth I earned by being 12, thinking I was invincible, and standing on the seat of my bike while riding on a sandy road.

I dislocated my knee playing with my miniature poodle. Cried like a 5 year old girl for 10 minutes and got wheeled to the hospital to wait for 4 hours, occasionally losing consciousness, before a doctor made a 3-second maneuver to pop my knee back in.

Doctor ended up saying I was a strange case, and after X-rays that my body type never really should have ever had a dislocation, especially under those circumstances. My poodle is awesome.

I don't break things, but I've gotten some nice cuts. I still have a scar from where a handlebar (with its grip worn away so that it was just a sharp ring of metal) went into my stomach. I've got another one from where a guy stabbed me all the way through my cheek with a pencil. I got bit pretty bad by a coyote once too.

Never broken anything though.

Never broke anything, but I do have a couple scars on my right leg from stupidity. One on my shin from banging it on the edge of a stage trying to jump up with my clarinet case, another on the inner side below my knee where I slipped on a sharp rock and went to subcutaneous tissue. Most of the rest of my injuries didn't leave lasting marks or happened before I could remember and therefore aren't too obvious.

I got bit in the face by a dog once. Looking back what went through my mind was priceless, cause it was all calm and thoughtful and sounded like it came from someone else. I also shall never never forget it.

"Huh, I just got bit in the face by a dog. Hmm, I am gonna panic now."

And so I did.

LIke many here, I've never broken any bones either, but for some reason--maybe 'cos I'm a fatass, maybe 'cos I'm clumsy, maybe 'cos I'm a clumsy fatass--I've sprained my ankles at a rate that I suspect is above the average for most people.

The worst one happened in my high school. We were a small school, and people tended to leave their things on the floor near their lockers (or cabinets because not all the lockers were installed yet) instead of actually putting it in. This included our current biology textbook, which was at least two inches thick if it was a millimeter and was the heaviest sumbitch textbook I ever had to carry. Anyway, I was running a tiny bit late to class (this was before the school had bells or anything like that, too--you got out when the teacher let you out, which caused a lot of problems like this) and wasn't really looking where my feet were going, and then I was on the floor with a biology text under one leg, my foot caught in a funny way against it and my other books and stuff everywhere. You can guess what had just happened.

I got to wait in an empty classroom while someone called my parents to pick me up, which was okay with me--except when I got a little nervous after I lost the feeling in my toes on that foot for five or ten minutes. I went straight to a doctor's office after that, where I had my first non-dental X-ray and discovered that, despite my ankle having swollen to approximately the size of a small cantaloupe, I hadn't actually broken any bones. I'd just twisted the living shit out of my right ankle. Still twinges a little, some days, 'cos I insisted on walking on it long before it was a good idea.

Still it was a solid three days out of class, lounging around at home with my ankle elevated, so it was hardly all bad.

I sat with a fracture in my elbow for 6 and a half months before the doctors accidently found it on an x-ray.

...That's really all I've got. :p

You know, replace 'stage' with 'wooden bedframe' and that's exactly how I got my scar in the same place.

I've also had numerous bad experiences (mostly from my stupidity and curiousity) with dogs during my childhood to the point where I've developed somewhat of a phobia of all dogs...

haha. some of those are pretty bitchin' injuries.
I smashed my front teeth out of my face when I was 5... I fell down a hill on my bike, cuz I forgot how to use the breaks. Split both lips like paper, and seperated the top lip from the gum line.
apparently while in the hospital some police officers saw me, and one started crying when he saw my mangled face. I got 78 stitches for that one, and a nice scar on my lower lip that persists to this day.
Also, I didn't get my front teeth back till I was 10.. lol