Yo Freakin' Ho: A Poorly Illustrated Space Pirates Adventure
 

Rules are as follows:

1. Suggest actions for the characters to act out.
2. I will cherry-pick them according to what flows best/is funniest/whatever random criteria.
3. I will illustrate them.
4. You will view them, and cringe at the consequences of your inevitably ill-advised actions.
5. Repeat!

There is a final goal which you are (supposed) to strive for, and, if/when achieved, the game is won. Good luck!

If you're new, here's a nifty archive. If you're not new, well... there's still this nifty archive.

1 2 3 GO

TG: Put on helmet and approach other guard.

DG: Take out gun and hide behind robot

TG: Fashion shiv out of guard helmet. Hand shiv to DG.
DG: Utilizing the natural affinity of British men for cross-dressing and transvestite shenanigans, disguise yourself as the little old lady from Pasadena as featured in the Beach Boys' similarly titled song and run him over with convertible. Hand shiv to R.
R: Shiv door until it opens.

TG: Motion compatriots forward. Noticing a distinct lack of opening apparatus on the door, knock politely.
R: Approach the unconscious guard in preparation for his attack: Anti Meat Bag Internal Assault Notated Consistently Everywhere. Also known as: The Part Where The Super Strong Robot Beats People With Particularly Heavy Parts Of The Scenery. A.M.B.I.A.N.C.E. for short.
DG: Dress as female for personal amusement.

TG: Knock out and Strip Guard down to underpants.
DG: Dress in Guard's clothes.(put own clothes into hat, put hat on top of helmet.)
R: Throw Guard at the turret.

All: Use unconscious body to reenact your favorite "dead bodies" bit from Whose Line.

Guard: Talk in sleep.

This update is proving pretty complex, so it might be a while. I am but mortal, and these suggestions are so golden that I can't bear to leave them out for the sake of speed.

http://img361.imageshack.us/img361/6596/part161ta8.jpg
http://img239.imageshack.us/img239/5166/part162dy5.jpg

All: Attempt to win over the guards affection by breaking into a long-winded Broadway musical number.
Guard: Talk in sleep.
TG: Persecute the guard for worshiping an inferior god.
TG: Snap the sleeping guard's neck.
TG: Snap the guards neck.
DG: Dress in Guard's clothes.(put own clothes into hat, put hat on top of helmet.)
R: Throw Guard at the turret.