Leaving A Message At The Tone Is Fundamentally Uncomfortable
 

Goddamn I hate leaving messages over the phone. In this age of E-mail I say the practice is a barbaric throwback to an uncivilized age.

I don't think I've ever been comfortable leaving a voice message to anyone in my life, except when I was perhaps sugar high and making fun of a friend's voice mail. Small exceptions to a big rule, though.

Voice mesages are an artform. If somebody is out I will hang up when I hear their answerphone and take time to compose my message either in poetic/rythmic/artistic form or full of references tailored to the person answered. And in the meantime the person comes home and I don't get to leave a message. What dicks.

*beep* "look Numsie we're all sick of getting these calls where we see your number and go 'oh hey look Numsie called I wonder what that's about' and check our messages and there's NOTHING so we're like oh well probably wasn't important so" oh fuck it cut me off *calls back* *beep* "okay like I was saying so we think it's not important and then we see you a week later and you're like 'oh my god Josh DIED last week why didn't you call me back' and we're like 'fffffffffffFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFF' so" *cuts off again* GOD DAMMIT.

I'm pretty sure voicemail/answering machines were once useful... you know, back before Caller ID allowed us to see exactly who called at any given point. But you'd have to ask an archaeologist about that one.

For me, I can't be bothered to leave messages because most people I know don't CHECK their voicemail/answering machines, and I know that on a lot of cell phones it actually costs money to both check and RECEIVE messages. So really I'm doing people a favour by leaving them wondering what the hell I was calling about.

You know I've rarely encountered voice mail boxes that cut me off like that, except for last week when the call was actually important. The computer network crashed at work and I had to call technical support. The conversation went something like "Hey so this is store #493 calling, earlier in the week I called with the same problem, and your guys were able to reboot everything. Anyway, uhhh, what you need to do is-" *cuts off*

"Ah fuck it its midnight I'm going home."

I've never had an issue leaving voice mail. In general my voice-messages follow this format:

"Hey (Name) it's (Me), I was just calling to (main reason for calling) so if you could call me back whenever you get this, that'd be great. (optional instructions and goodbye)"

It works like a charm every time. Although for some reason I can't access my voice mail, I've told everyone, but everyone still leaves me voices messages. So I've got a completely full voicemail-box on my cell with no way to listen to any of them.

You know, that would help me greatly to develop a format. I always end up sounding like an idiot because I don't know how to talk to answering machines, leaving lots of "uhh" time in between the actual bits of my message, which are generally fluid and natural. Also, I tend to be a bit more, er, succinct than is polite on occasion. :sweatdrop

If the people didn't already know me, I don't think any of them would want to talk to me, like, ever.

Since my cell has caller ID I usually check my voicemail and delete it then call them back.

Works out nicely to cut out marketers.

I love leaving voicemails. I hate e-mails.

I really do hate this age of technology because of how impersonal it is. Getting an e-mail and getting a call are two completely different interactions. Someone who calls shows they care a lot more, and are much more personal.

I don't do e-mails too much. I'm a much bigger fan of phone calls, or even better, showing up in person.