Calvain ball X we're on perade
 

To celibrate the tenth anniversery of calvain ball we shall be at the streets of LA during a perade between a walmart and kmart chose your side (kmart or wal mart) and fight (its not a team fight its picking your supplier)

"Wal-Mart is Superior to K-Mart, thus I choose K-Mart. Wait, did that make sense? oh well. K-mart is going to own walmart!" throws some decently priced items at the Walmart side.

representing the disenting faction, in a flamboyant gesture of anti bipartisanship and rebellion, Zoamelgustar bears the coat of arms from Target. thinking about it in retrospect, a Tshirt with a bulls eye wil serve no good purpose in Calvin Ball. "oh well" he sighs, "at least I'll get free underwear"

Jadarendir stands in the middle of the street, watching the parade pass by him. He pities HoP's poor typing skills, and waits to see what side SAAM will take before choosing a side of his own.

Music from the parade drones on. Vibrant colours fill the streets. A lone, darkened figure passes through the crowd. His sword, tucked beneath his belt, his spear, stapped to his back. His green and red armor blends into the crowd. His mouth, covered by a gray scarf, blows through the crowd and merly hits people in the face. He looks up towards the two franchises. "K-Mart......" he mutters "Is for the dead and the extinct." He wips around toward Wal-mart. Walking across the street, a huge shadow looms over him. He looks up to see a giant meteor, plummiting to the planet. Or is it? As it plummets towards the earth, it gets smaller and smaller. In the middle of the street stands the one lone mystical orb, the Calvinball. It zips off, so fast, no person can see it go. Thunder Dragoon runs for Wal-mart to find a shopping cart. He jumps in and takes off into the dreaded parking lot......

CheshireThief materializes in the middle of the road. He looks around and realizes he is no longer the referee, and his army is gone. On one end of the street is K-Mart. On the other, Wal-Mart. CheshireThief senses a war is about to start. He swifty sneaks into Wal-Mart. He is, after all, a thief, and he won't grace K-Mart with his presence. Quality isn't good enough. CheshireThief grabs a shopping cart and begins filling it with stolen goods.

In the parking lot, TD swerves around car after car. While passing the cars, he steals purchased goods (ie.cheetohs, dr. pepper, pepsi, a t-shirt, a toaster oven, cds, cheetohs and......cheetohs?) and stashes them in the kart. He eventually finds a motor home at the very back. He transports his goods into the oversized trailer and starts it up. He shifts the motor home into Neutral and puts a brick with a rope attatched to it on the gas pedal. After the vehicle is at about 200 mph, he ties another rope to the shift stick. He aims the motor home in the general direction of K-Mart. Simutaniously, He yanks the brick off and puts the vehicle into drive and the motor home whips off towards K-Mart. TD turns back to go into Wal-mart and several klicks away, an explosion at K-Mart changes the lives of all those who are around...

CheshireThief, watching a TV in Wal-Mart, sees the K-Mart explosion via security cameras. He shouts, in victory, "Take that NASCAR! You too, Martha Stewert!" He regains his composure and continues stealing things.

Inside Wal-mart, an asortment of disappering (thanks to CheshireTheif) items range through the department store. Cheerleaders near the entrance are learing how to spell Wal-mart (dash line included) and cashiers casually take smoke break after smoke break. TD walks to the electronic department where he reasembles TV's, VCR's, DVD players, gaming systems and other electronics into a super powered beam cannon. After *negotiating* (sir, that will be $300 <SMACK!>) with the cashiers, he takes it outside and aims it toward K-Mart once more. The TV's inside Wal-mart light up the event, live on channel 7. Department after deparment in K-Mart, materialize into nothingness.

Bob, watching the parade from a tenth-story window, whips out a rifle he purchased at Wal-Mart, at a sale price that's bargain had never been seen before. He began to pick random people off one by one. Then, his army of slightly-above-average-fur-bearing-salmon-trout and donkeys jump out the window and stampede through the streets, headed towards the remains of K-Mart.

As CheshireThief walks around Wal-Mart, he realizes his shoes are worn out after the last couple of rounds in the Calvinball game. He walks over to the shoe section, takes his shoes off, and replaces them with brand new shoes! He went all out and grabbed the $30 pair! CheshireThief then used some of his stolen merchandise to create a few exact duplicates of himself. "Just in case..."

AGWS (anti gnosis weapon system)
 

Zoam, taking note of all the carnage raging between the two department stores, takes the opportunity to buy Xenosaga II, he then uses play-dough and legos to manufactur exact (working) replicas of the AGWS. Teleporting into the cockpit of one, he slaves the others OS's to his control board and routes a sophisticated AI subroutine through their piloting interfaces (a la evangelion dummy plug). He then starts the mp3 for The Goo Goo dolls "Dizzy Up the Girl" and invades Wal Mart with his army of super futuristic mecha.

From the rubble that was K-Mart, Jarlax emerges. He looks around and seeing his source of items is gone quickly changes sides and runs into wal-mart. Seeing all of the mechs he quickly runs to the sports supply area. And grabs some assorted weapons. He then climbs to the top of the shelves and scouts the area.

Torint throws off his band uniform and rushes to defend the Walmart from the mechs in his Matrix brand APU. Machine guns flashing, the parade is lit up by the muzzle flashes, as mech after mech falls to the ground, and Torint screams like the insane captain from revolutions!

Seeing the carnage going on in the middle of all the mechs, Jarlax uses the crossbow he found in the sports supply area to shoot at Torint. Then jumps down and draws an alchemy circle(from the anime: Full Metal Alchemist) on the ground, and just waits standing over it.

Seeing his mechanical army torn to shreds by heavy automatic fire (note to self: play dough does not a good mecha make) Zoam decides to simultaneously activate all self destruct systems in every robot. As an avalanche of multicolored blocks and dough rain from the sky, Zoam takes the opportunity to run behind the convenient cover provided by a united states postal service mail box. Checking the ammunition on his dual 9mm's he aims at Torint through the rainbow haze. As a lone white pigeon flaps into his field of view he opens fire in a hail of lead.

A-tech of an argument
 

Bob sees Zoam massacring(sp?) Wal-Mart. He lets his small animal army have their way with K-Mart as he gets down on the ground and calls forth an A-tech (from my book...maybe). He gets in the cockpit and weilds every weapon it has. A buster rifle, machine gun, heat saber, and several rocket launchers throughout its body. He runs off to confront Zoam.

As the mech pieces fall Jarlax uses the alchemy circle to make cover for himself using some of the floor of walmart.

In a devastating display of skill and luck, Zoam weaves his way through the torrential gunfire towards torint. As he leaps onto the chassis of torint's robot, he places two rounds into the cranium of his adversary at point blank range. As the overly animated crimson spray issues forth from what used to be the head of torint, Zoam focuses his attention on Bob. he somersaults over an outcropping of cement that until revently was a wall of Kmart, thus provided with excellent cover he remembers just in time that buster cannons can shoot through cement. he teleports away at the last second, narrowly avoiding painful atomization at the hands of Bob.

Using his alchemy circle necklace, Jarlax summons bolts of Lightning through what is left of Wal-marts roof. These bolts hit all around Zoam and Bob, scoring a few hits.

walking calmly through the lightning storm, Zoam reaches the hiding place of Jarlax. Grabbing his alchemy necklace from him with a curt "give me that you asshole!" he promptly slaps Jarlax in the face with such force as to render him unconscious.

thusly slapped, Jarlax is left in a rather undignified heap somewhere in the remains of the womens lingere aisle.

Without Jarlax's will being forced through his Alchemy necklace the lightning storm promptly stops. Jarlax tries to regain consiousness, but fails and will be out till i get back online.

Dynasty Warriors!
 

Pulling the crossbow bolt from his head, Torint wearily draws his sword, Leviathan, which is from Dynasty Warriors 4 Xtreme Legends. Drawing on it's awesome eleventh level powers, Torint creates a tidal wave that washes over the city, except for the Wal-Mart. Torint smiles, and hopes the people in K-Mart can swim.

CheshireThief hits up the sporting goods section himself. He grabs a lot of camping supplies, and quickly (away from everyone's view... behind Wal-Mart) makes an underground bomb shelter with a hidden door above ground. He rushes back to Wal-Mart and fills his shelter with supplies.

from on top of Wal-Mart, a black-robed figure lets out a cold laugh..........then launches a barrage of house-sized energy missiles at the smoking remains of K-mart...................aiming blast after blast at the inferior store. He takes a short break, grinning wickedly at the wreckage.
"Thank Mystra for these ultra-low-price spell components they were selling at Wal-Mart!" laughs and launches another blast.........calling to mind a spell of teleportation, he appears in the bunker where Cheshire Theif was storing his stuff, casting a Quickened Greater Invisibility before CT can see him. He then grabs all of the valuable items there, teleporting back to the roof when he is finished.

If there's one thing a Thief knows, it's when his things are missing. He chuckles as he looks down at his watch and presses a button. All of the stolen items explode, with the plastique he implanted on each one of them. He goes back into Wal-Mart and steals more items for his shelter, leaving one of his duplicates to watch the shelter.

TD returns into Wal-mart (unless he already is) and heads over to the McDonalds. There, he buys 25 1/2 CC sandwich combos and fiddles them with little, modified electronic gizmos from the electronics department. He puts 'trackers' on the devices and arms the gizmo's to on. He them summons his penguin army and dispatches them to transport them to the mech battle outside. The penguins waddle to the mechs where they fire shots at each other. TD, watching his tracking device sees the green dot overlap the red dot. He presses the red button and a fiery explosion engulfs the street and smoke blows into Wal-mart. He laughs....

Bob is safe and sound in his 'mech derivative and begins an all-out assault on TD, launching wave after wave of cruise missles at him and leaving the air itself glowing with discharge from the buster rifle. He then opens up with his vulcan cannons, emptying cartridge after cartridge of shells into TD, leaving him somewhere between swiss cheese and rye toast.

Recovering from being cheeze-wized-afied, TD gets up and runs back to Wal-mart. There he fills a shopping cart of Mountain Dew and races back out the store. TD fills a nearby pot full of the Mountain Dew and, with all his might, throws the Mountain Dew on Bob's mech. It rusts instantly. "What the hell?..." TD looks puzzled. "I though Mountain Dew would burn it away instantly!" TD looks at the bottles and it says "Akbar's fresh made Mountain Dew. Great for burning things!" (sorry if I get burned for this from Brian or any of the mods, just trying to make a joke). Off in the distance, a quiet but faint phrase, "Suckers!", emits through the air. TD droops his head, but is reminded that Bob is now rendered usless....

Bob immediately leaps out of his war machine and rips a rusty piece of metal off one of the legs. He uses it as a sword and stabs TD several times in the lower abdomen. TD developes a severe form of lockjaw.

CheshireThief, watching the entire battle from his closed circuit television in his shelter, deploys one of his duplicates to issue TD a tetanus shot.

Torint uses Leviathan's power to vanish into the fog he just created. Unseen, he sneaks into what is left of the K Mart and causes all the cash registers to float and destroy the city, so the enraged populace sues K Mart!

Suddenly, black clouds appear, the sky darkens, lightning strikes, and out of the gloom comes The Slightly Above Average Tropical Storm!

SAATS sees the feud between the Wal-mart and K-mart tribes, he comments. "I haven't seen a blood feud like this since the Catapults took on the Montegues in Romeo and Juliet."

With that, he summoned all the power of tropical storm Floyd, and shattered both buildings with enormous gusts of wind and billions of volts of lightning. (which did in fact strike in the same place several times... that place was High on Pawns.)

the wind congrigated around the calvinball, which was hidden in the K-mart, and blew it into SAATH's hands.

"the big bad wolf ain't got nothin' on me!"

He then blew the remaining players into the rubble, and soared on a gust of wind to the city of Sudbury.

Jadarendir was there, waiting for him.

Jadarendir summoned Joey Jordison, first drummer for Slipknot, and granted him a machete, thus turning him into... JOEY X.

Joey X teamed up with Jadarendir, and the two of them used their blades to reduce the city to pure rubble. Then Jadarendir grew wings and flew up into the SAATS, casting a "calm" spell to relinquish the storm. Then he created a storm of his own... A FIRE STORM!!!

However, being in Sudbury, the most desolate Winter wasteland in Canada (besides Winipeg) the firestorm is thus extinguished by the blinding snow.

the Tropical Storm was once again summoned with all the power of jack frost at it's disposal.

Jadarendir, master of magics, summons Black Mage, who then attacks the SAATS with a DOUBLE HADOKEN!! SAATS is incinerated.

Mo' Like Master of Ass.

The double hadoken instead somehow fries Danu, who was just getting into the battle.

"Well I didn't see that one comming!" SAATS replies.

Jadarendir decides that SAATS is just too stubborn to fuggin' die. Therefore, he attacks HoP with a quad shot from his bow. All 4 of his arrows hit, and with the elemental shdw damage, HoP dies and his body melts away. After a brief mental scan, Jadarendir knows that HoP is indeed dead, and that was not a copy.

Learn to type, man.

Whistles as he walks into Sudbury, as he Yo-yo's his yo-yo.

"Hi guys i herd that there was some sort of, AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH HHHHHH.......an ant.

Danu then proceads to get blasted away, not moveing as the blast burns his flesh off. He then looks in the general direction of SAATC, folding his arms and shakeing hish ead.

"Uh, excuse me sir but i do beleave i was the one who created that Tec...*dies*"

after liquoring up on cheap boos from the grocery section in Kmart (or Wal mart, I forgot) Zoam emerges from a pile of rubble. He starts singing stupid japanese drinking songs, which then lead into anime theme songs. "Tachimukau saki ni, kawaita kaze, hageshiku fukiaretemo. Jumon de hitotsumo tonaetenara, watashi no pace ni naru. Daremo ga urayamu, kono power to, bibou ga urosonai wa. Donna aite demo, hirumanaide, manto o nabikaseru no..." as the opening song to Slayers continues, a door smacks him in the head rendering Zoam unconscious. He comes to in a desolate snowy wilderness. "Sudbury, I hates me some Sudbury. That is a fact"

SAATS then summons his Tropical Storm to zap HoP everytime someone says "Macbeth."


Macbeth Macbeth Macbeth Macbeth Macbeth Macbeth Macbeth Macbeth Macbeth Macbeth Macbeth Macbeth Macbeth Macbeth Macbeth Macbeth Macbeth Macbeth Macbeth Macbeth Macbeth Macbeth Macbeth Macbeth Macbeth Macbeth Macbeth Macbeth Macbeth Macbeth Macbeth Macbeth Macbeth Macbeth Macbeth Macbeth Macbeth Macbeth Macbeth Macbeth Macbeth Macbeth Macbeth Macbeth Macbeth

Macbeth.

After inexplicably shouting out that name, Zoam searches the tundra for more alcohol.

Macbeth

CheshireThief, startled by the new events, remains in his shelter. He furiously begins making clones of himself. He sends CheshireClone 1 out to destroy. He sees SAATS and gets an idea. He pulls out of nowhere a meteorlogical rocket. He fires it into the sky. It completely dissapates the storm. Too bad it only lasts for 10 minutes. Seeing how he's in Canadia, CheshireClone 1 quickly gathers an army of caribou and storms the bearer of the Calvinball.

Torint, having been turned to snow after his fog was blown to Canada and froze, awakes to find himself with all the power of snow and ice under his control. He taps into the unlimted power that is cold, and causes a nuclear winter. That means snow falls from the sky and explodes. Everyone within a twelve mile radius is either dead or something very close to it. He casually picks up the calvinball, and flys to the where used to stand a K mart, a walmart, and some very unhappy parade enthusiasts. Oh, and Macbeth!

Danu Wakes up from his death, seeming to be perfectly fine on meny different levels. He shrugs slightly, scratching his arse and berping.

Macbeth Macbeth Macbeth Macbeth Macbeth Macbeth Macbeth Macbeth Macbeth Macbeth Macbeth Macbeth Macbeth Macbeth Macbeth Macbeth Macbeth Macbeth Macbeth Macbeth Macbeth Macbeth Macbeth Macbeth Macbeth Macbeth Macbeth Macbeth Macbeth Macbeth Macbeth Macbeth Macbeth Macbeth Macbeth Macbeth Macbeth Macbeth Macbeth Macbeth Macbeth Macbeth........

He then turns around and starts playing basketball, not doing too well. After a while he gets bored and runs towards SAATS, slaping him across the face.

"Thats for Hitting me with a blast of....stuff and...doom.

At this time Jarlax reawakens. "Huh? Whats going on? Macbeth Macbeth Macbeth Macbeth Macbeth Macbeth Macbeth! Seeing Zoam wandering around and remembering what happened earlier Jarlax rushes him with his discount Katana purchased at Wal-Mart.

ooc I'm not even playing

OOC: too fuggin' bad.

macbeth macbeth macbeth macbeth macbeth macbeth macbeth macbeth macbeth macbeth macbeth macbeth macbeth macbeth macbeth macbeth macbeth macbeth macbeth macbeth macbeth macbeth macbeth macbeth macbeth macbeth macbeth macbeth macbeth macbeth macbeth macbeth macbeth macbeth macbeth macbeth macbeth macbeth macbeth macbeth macbeth macbeth macbeth macbeth macbeth macbeth macbeth macbeth macbeth macbeth macbeth macbeth macbeth macbeth macbeth macbeth macbeth macbeth macbeth macbeth macbeth macbeth macbeth macbeth macbeth macbeth macbeth macbeth macbeth macbeth macbeth macbeth macbeth macbeth macbeth macbeth macbeth macbeth macbeth macbeth macbeth macbeth macbeth macbeth macbeth macbeth macbeth macbeth macbeth macbeth macbeth macbeth macbeth macbeth macbeth macbeth macbeth macbeth macbeth macbeth macbeth macbeth .

Heehee... HoP is suffering. :D

*blinks, his eyes opening again...........trying to remember what the hell just happened* "ach, good thing my robes improve my armor bonus! And this discount Ring of Regeneration is sure handy for fixing critical wounds!" looks around........noticing the blasting of HoP....a wicked, black-mage-esque grin appears on his features.
"Macbeth macbeth macbeth macbeth macbeth macbeth macbeth macbeth macbeth macbeth macbeth macbeth macbeth magbeth macbeth macbeth macbeth macbeth macbeth macbeth..........."

sorry HoP is not here at this time please send a message after the tone *tooooooooooone*

<I think the blasts finally killed him!> DB sends a telepathic message to the others.........then Teleports himself into the air above CT's caribou army, using his Wings of Flying (bought at a discount from Wal-Mart!) to stay aloft. "Try to blow me up, will you?" with a cruel laugh, he lands in front of the caribou horde, then uses Hadoken to blast the army to smithereens, along with Cheshire Thief. Then, he hunts down all of Cheshire's clones and uses Epic-Level Death-Magic to kill them all "Now the calvinball shall be MINE!!!!!"

Confronted with foes traversing everywhere, TD recovers from the tetnus shot and moves on. He trips over a rock and swears 'Macbeth' several times, grabbing his foot, and hopping around on the other. He shakes his head and goes over to SAATS and laughs. "The olny thing that can defeat a Tropical Storm... is me!" TD slowly levitates into the air, while electric bolts start swaying around him. "Electrodoken!" he yells and a brihgt, lightning blast hits SAATS, whom is electrified terribly. With the power of water imbeded in SAATS, the electric charge is quadrupled ten times over. Charred and burned severely, TD laughs and turns toward the K-Marter's. "Your turn." he grins and deals out electrodoken after electrodoken. Smoke is abundant in the air.

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

HoP wakes up from a long nap and remembers the calvain ball game has started and he slept in AGAIN so rushes out of the eployees (sp) only section of the super target and casts his newly learned spell skewer which takes out wal-mart and K-mart and the local toys-backwards r-us.

With the minor power of the Calvin, TD reflects the skewer spell away from Wal-mart and directs it towards the remains of K-mart. Poor K-mart. Poor, poor K-mart.

then in the ruble of the K-mart comes a super K-mart or SUPER K with a little TBCY ice cream shop.

Due to a high profit income, careful business planning and precise consumer intake, Wal-mart merges with not one but two companies. Wal-mart merges with EB and Toys R US, thus to create a Electronic R Mart or ERM. Consumers flood the store, buying as many goods as they can. TD benefits from the power, and all other Wal-martian fighters, and his power increases 25 times over. He glares and Super K and sends four suped-up fireballs towards it. The results are devistating....

out of nowhere.........DB appears, then with a fierce grin of wicked glee, shouts "MISSILEDOKEN".............Blasts of energy fly everywhere, quickly reducing the newly-remade Supe-K-mart into piles of rubble. "For a 'super' version of something, use Epic Spells! Even for something as pathetic as a K-mart, It's still damn fun to watch!" He laughs as his power is increased 25x by the surges of energy from the transformation of Wal-Mart into the ultra-powerful ERM.

then HoP uses a new skewer that goes though the first thing (what ever you try to block the blast with or you if you don't block)making you get out of the way and then hits all walmart owned companies

TD turns his attention to one of his newer not-so-entirly-mortal enemy, HoP (ranks somewhere between my brother and a lawn sprinkler). He charges up a Electrodoken and fires, only to realize he can only use it 5 times a day. "Holy ****!!" TD yells. He goes to plan B. He runs to the sports department and grabs a golf club. Afterwards, he goes to the toys section and assembles a toy gun onto the club. Finally, he goes to the electronics department, and turns the toy gun into a long ranged, automatic rifle. "Say goodbye, HoP!" TD smirks. Holes constantly rips through HoP, who then leaks chess pieces onto the ground (instead of real blood). "Whoa..." TD gawks. "He really is a chess nerd."

but then HoP reviels his other passion, lacrosse, (I have four passions) and gets out a lacrosse stick and hurls lacrosse balls at TD turning him into a pile of merchentized ash
((I am in the semi-jock social class in my school so there))

"What the.....?" DB stares at HoP "What is he, some kind of chess-golem with a lacrosse fetish?" While he waits for an answer, he casts a "Reflect Any Spell Cast by HoP spell" (it reflects, instead of blocking, so the skewer spell is reflected) on the ERM, then unleashes a Hadoken at HoP......."THIS should finish him!!!!! FOR THE GLORY OF WAL-MART!!!!!!!" The skewer-spell and the Hadoken hit HoP at the same time, immolating him AND inflicting stabbity death at the same time!

Rallyed by DB's spirit, TD rushes HoP with a barbarian yell. HoP, devistated is slashed, stabbed and mutliated by TD's spear and sword. HoP's lacrosse stick is chopped to mere pieces. HoP, looks down at his gut and realizes that his internal organs are bleeding. "That should delay him for now." TD says to DB, panting. TD then returns to Wal-mart for a refreshing bottle of Coca-cola and a huge bag of cheetoh's.

ooc and chucking lacrosse balls is not a spell

OVERDONE OVERDONE and thus the hadoken backfires and blows up all wal-mart own companys and then HoP goes to wall street and buys walmart with chess sets, lacrosse balls, drum sets and latin books using the barder system and then lays off all of the workers thus ending wal-mart forever

Still shouting his battle cry, DB pulls the SpellSword from its sheath at his hip, and begins slicing HoP into small pieces, the blue fire wreathing his blade burning the pieces to ash with each cut.

And, since his spells are never overdone, he immediately realizes HoP's evil plan....."that monster altered my spell!!!!!"

casts Time Warp.......going back to a few minutes earlier, and altering the past so that his spell WORKED

"ha-HA!!! Take THAT, K-mart worshipping demon!!! Now we know your weapons of Evil, and can counter them" Summons checkers, guitar, Elvish Language textbook (the TRUE useless language!), and Hockey!

then a phone rings and the messege says "hi this is HoP just telling you that I am long gone with the calvain ball and wal-mart is no more
edit (you cant just edit your actions like that) since you can't tell where I shop then your spell back fires /edit

But then Sam Walton comes back from the dead and rez's Walmart. "I will not allow my store to die!!" He runs at HoP and jumps inside him. Then he make HoP explode outward in a big bloody mess. "That'll teach you for messing with Walmart." he says as he goes back to his rest.

"Check again, HoP" DB shouts "and know that your evil has been defeated!" Then, using his increased power, he Nukes every K-Mart on the planet.

TD, confounded by HoP's lack of organizing a solid story, rushes to the wall street and gambles with other companies to strengthen, invest and mass produce for Wal-mart. With the new investments, Wal-mart single-handly becomes the most powerful, international corporation across the globe. Thus, TD's and other Wal-martians gain strength, speed, intellect and other stat bonuses. TD, buffed up, grabs his spear and sword and fuses them into a long sword with an extra serrated tip, perfect for slicing any know substance. HoP, rendered helpless, runs in the other direction of TD. TD leaps off with on foot and flies towards HoP and with a quick slash, cleaves HoP in two. As HoP reforms back together, TD gains a spell bonus and drains part of HoP's god power. (Remember, god mode is always set to on)

ahh but I have lawyers who finds some rule that makes me come back to life and they all so find a rule of no team ups and thus you two attack each other

Kills your lawyers, thus ELIMINATING your rules, and creates several Portals in Wal-Mart, thus encouraging interplanar trade..........Wal-Mart becomes even richer, now the richest corporation in the multiverse. Then, he uses the Spellsword and his staff to beat/slice HoP, draining his god-power as well. Finishing with a Raistlin-style spell of total and complete annihilation.

Walmart lawyers are much more powerful, as their leader is Johny Cockran(Don't know if that's right) so they find a loop-hole around your rule, which states that this is the case, only if they are teaming up on someone other than a K-mart lackey.

By checking with his "friends in high places", gov't officials ban the lawyers from 'assisting' HoP and besides, we're not on teams, we have alliances. (kinda sounds like a dorky survivor rip off). TD reminds HoP that we play until a final challenge erupts, and that's not gonna happen for a while.

well after consulting my lawyers you cant do that so wal-mart is taken to court where wal-mart goes bankrupt

And K-mart turns into a dragon and eats HoP.

The Slightly Above Average Tropical Storm got to his feet, his powers returning as the storm reformed. He is about to cast the greatest of all weather desturbances when Jadarendir points out to him that they are in Sudbury, which is miles from the ocean and as a result, Tropical Storms would never make it this far. the Storm Fizzles, but SAATH pulls out his Stat sheet and scribbles something on it.

"Aha! I am now the Slightly Above Average Blizzard!"

"Oh, and by the way: Macbeth."

A bolt of lightning strikes HoP, much to the amusement of others.

He then summons the second-worst of all weather desturbences: the Halagonian Blizzard! 100 cm of snow falls on the area, baracading the stores and costing each store (and the city of sudbury itself) millions of dollars in damages, and also prevents them from getting to their cars.

"The glory will be for The Bay!" he yells, supporting the oldest retail chain in the world (located in Canada and used to control over 60% of it) and all are forced to shovel for three weeks, while the plows box them in yet again.

"Mwahahahahaha!"

Fortunately, Walmart had low prices on a weather machine, so they altered the weather such that it only affected K-mart and the rest of the city.

In the courts, TD and others represent Wal-mart and win the lawsuit. K-mart is sentenced to it's own bankrupcy and is reduced down to a little corner store on Bay Street where it sells newspapers, oragami statues and cigarettes. Wal-mart continues to dominate the world and starts to form a Wal-mart nation. "That's all I can do for know. Good luck my fellow Wal-martians and use my power to banish the K-mart evil!" TD disappears in a puff of smoke, soon to return in the future....

ok I go and buy k-mart and make it a good company making all people adore me and worship me and do what I ask and I ask them to attack you and they come on to you like a angry hord of zombies

Luckily, no one knows what a zoby is, so they disappear in a puff of uncreative smoke.

Edit: by that, I meant the mob didn't know what zobies were, so the people tried to attack like them and ended up disappearing.

ooc huh .....what ....zoby is what...what misspelling