Tips for writing comics
 

So, after watching two very, very different anime at four in the morning, I had an idea for a comic, and decided to start writing the script, with the intent of seeing if any artists were interested in drawing it based on the first 'episode'. So far it seems to be going well, but I have little to no experience writing comic scripts. What are the things I should look out for? How much detail should I include? How do I come up with not shitty sound effects?

Is there anyone with more experience in the matter who'd be willing to give me some advice?

a script is a script, dosent really matter what's for, the basic structure is pretty much the same. It's literally a description of your imagination...

If you're aiming at comics, what you should do differently is that you must make clear each individual panel. Describe what is going on (the Setting, the "Mood", any details you think are important) and then the characters (how are they "acting", what they are saying and how they are saying) sound effects are just "Sounds of gunfire in the background" or "Airplance passes overhead" stuff like that.

Make sure that you have enough detail in each panel that the artist will know what exactly you were expecting out of it. Don't just say:
"Panel one:

Frank: "I like to KICK DRAGON NINJAS IN THE FACE"
Ted: "Yeah, ME TOO."

*Kicks dragon ninja in the face*"


Give a description of the setting around the speaking characters, what they might be doing, et cetera.

"Panel one: Frank and Ted are standing on a grassy knoll, looking tired. Bodies of dragon ninjas litter the ground around them; a battle is going on.

Frank: (While kicking a dragon ninja in the face) I like to <Split text. Continue on a bubble on the bottom of the panel, to be seen after kick> KICK DRAGON NINJAS IN THE FACE.

Ted: (Fist in a Dragon Ninja's stomach) Yeah, ME TOO."


Give a general direction for the art, and the placement of text boxes. Where the bubbles go can have a big impact on how the comic comes off, so if you want something to be said -after- an action, make sure the artist knows it.

Okay, I haven't gotten around to adding where the speech bubbles go, but can anyone give me a harsh critiquing of what I have so far?

Scene One CharactersScene One Characters

Samael

Age: Looks about sixty
Height: 5' 11”
Eye Color: Blue
Hair: Gray, wiry, and just over shoulder length.
Skin: Dark tan and leathery
Facial Features: Large, hooked nose. Thick eyebrows. Thin lips. Facial structure is fairly muscular.
Clothing: A white, long sleeved jacket with an open front and gold cufflinks. A white, button-up shirt beneath the jacket and done up all the way. Wears a white tie. Shirt is tucked into pants. Pants are also white. A section of thin, gold chain can be seen coming out of the left pocket of the jacket. White dress shoes.



Hadin

Age: Looks about ten
Height: 4' 5”
Eye Color: Blue
Hair: White. Hair is fairly short and well combed, but not parted.
Skin: Pale
Facial Features: Somewhat rounded face, but not fat. Small, slightly upturned nose. Long eyelashes. Has a very fair appearance.
Clothing: Mirror's Samael's, minus the cufflinks, chain, and tie.

Scene OneScene One (Whole scene has a dreary feel)

Page One

Panel One: A dark red ceiling with stalactites hanging from it, and the tips of some stalagmites can be seen. There is a huge fire just below the panel.

Panel Two: A small crack appearing in the ceiling. SFX “krik”

Panel Three: The crack growing massive. It goes in for directions at once. The ceiling near the center of the crack looks to be caving in slightly. SFX “Crack”

Panel Four: A city street at nighttime with the same crack appearing in it. There is a lamppost on the sidewalk on the right side of the panel. The lights from more street lamps can be seen in the distance. On the left side of the panel is a wooden building with a closed sign hanging on the door. Just past that is an alley and brick building with wide store windows.

Panel Five: A close up of the crack, from the street view, with smoke coming out of it.



Page Two

Panel One: And old man [Samael] and a young boy [Hadin] stepping out of the alley and into the street.

Panel Two: A close up of [Samael]'s face. His eyes are only half open and he is looking slightly downward, towards the crack, which is off panel.

Panel Three: [Samael] is squatting/crouching next to the crack and [Hadin] is standing him. [Samael] is frowning. [Hadin] is looking down the street, away from the reader.
[Samael] - “I had hoped to prevent this.”
[Hadin] - “You did your best.”

Panel Four: A close up view of [Samael] in the process of standing. He is smiling slightly.
[Samael] - “I'm glad you think so, Hadin.”

Panel Five: A view of [Hadin] from the waste up, still staring down the street.
[Hadin] - “What are we going to do?”

Panel Six: [Hadin] has turned back to face [Samael], who is now standing. [Samael] is pulling a large book from his jacket.
[Samael] - “We can't very well let things run their course, can we?”
[Hadin] - “Probably not.”



Page Three

Panel One: The book rests open in [Samael]'s left hand. His right hand's index finger is pointed halfway down the left page. His eyebrows are furrowed. [Hadin] stands tip-toe next to [Samael] trying to get a good look at the book.
[Samael] - “Hmmm.”

Panel Two: A close-up of the book, now suddenly closed and held tightly by the spine with the pages pointing skyward. On the back of the book, which is the side facing the viewer, there is a cross, with a simplistically drawn eye acting as the arms to the cross. SFX “Fwump”

Panel Three: A close-up of [Samael]'s jacket as he slides the book back in.

Panel Four: [Samael] pulling a heavy, black skeleton key from his jacket now. The handle of the key has a small ruby embedded in it.

Panel Five: From [Samael]'s perspective, looking down at [Hadin]. [Samael] is placing the key in [Hadin]'s right hand, which he is holding by the wrist with his right hand. [Hadin] has a shocked expression on his face.



Page Four

Panel One: Showing the whole area again. [Samael] has turned around and is walking back towards the alley. [Hadin] is staring at his hand, which is closed in a fist around the key. SFX “Swish” for [Samael]'s jacket.
[Hadin] - “What am I supposed to do?”

Panel Two: Close up of [Samael]'s face, with a slightly open grin. The dark alley can be seen behind him.
[Samael] - “The first will make his appearance soon. I don't expect you'll have a hard time finding him.”

Panel Three: [Hadin] reaching out towards [Samael], a puzzled look on his face, somewhat panicked.
[Hadin] - “Wait! I don't understand.”

Panel Four: [Samael], facing away from [Hadin], mostly obscured by the darkness of the alley, sighing.
[Samael] - “Didn't you pay any attention all these years?”

Panel Five: A side view of [Samael]'s face, heavily shadowed. He is frowning and his eyes seem to glow slightly.
[Samael] - “The Gatekeeper will be drawn to the first, just like you. That key will be the sign of your contract.”

Panel Six: [Samael]'s eyes, giving off a piercing glare.
[Samael] - “Got it?”



Page Five

Panel One: [Samael] stepping further into the shadows of the alley.

Panel Two: The dark alley, minus [Samael].

Panel Three: [Hadin] staring downwards at his open hand, a sad expression on his face.

Panel Four: A close-up of [Hadin]'s palm. The key is resting across it.
[Hadin] - “No, Father, I don't get it.”

Panel Five: An overhead view of [Hadin] standing next to the crack, still staring downward.
[Hadin] - “I don't get it at all.”

I hate to say this but it's great! but maybe you need to make it a novel instead just feels more like a novel. but its your project

While not an artist myself I still found that I could very easily visualize everything as I read it, and that seems to be a key factor here. You're very detailed in your descriptions, which I would assume would help the artist out greatly. The pacing seems a little slow but that might be either what you intended, or because reading all that in descriptions is much slower than it would be to just look at the series of pictures.

Other than that good stuff. The characters seem fairly interesting and you've managed to hook me 'cause I now want to know what the heck is going on, what that key is for, who is the First and the Gatekeeper, and what exactly is the relationship between Samael and Hadin.

One more thing,

Novels have pros and cons versus comics. While both tell a story, comics are a much more visual experience rather than a descriptive one. The world you see is what the world is, instead of you interpreting and imagining what you read. Novels also have a greater sense of closure over comics, while comics make better use of cliffhangers and suspense during story arcs.

All in all I have to disagree with you and say this seems like perfect comic material. I believe the pacing, mood, and setting will be much better with the help of definitive visual additions to the writing (which is pretty damn good in my opinion, NonCon).

Also with comics you can get away with visual and thematic elements that are automatically lampshaded with the "Oh it's a comic" thing, hence comic book violence.

I have little to no experience personally, but from what I heard it'll be a big help if you sketch the page layout a few times, just to get the gist of how many panels you want, where you want them and what shape they are.

A two page scene, but it's more convenient for me this way
 

Scene Two CharactersScene Two Characters



Luke

Age: 17
Height: 5' 8”
Eye Color: Green
Hair: Black. Very curly. Reaches just past ear length. Shiny.
Skin: Light tan and smooth
Facial Features: Muscular build. Short nose. Wide mouth that turns downwards ever so slightly, like he's always kind of frowning. Bushy eyebrows that make him look angry all the time. Each ear has a silver earring in the lobe, with a green bead hanging from each earring on a thin hemp string. Has a small, somewhat pointed goatee.
Clothing: Tan cargo pants with large pockets. Black flip-flops. Short sleeved, black button up shirt with a white skull emblem on the back. The top two buttons are undone. A hemp necklace with a small, light pink scallop seashell hanging from it.

Scene TwoScene Two



Page One

Panel One: [Luke]'s room, viewed from the door into it. Only the far back wall and the wall on the right side can be seen, as well as the floor, which is black and white tile. The walls are painted sky blue, and there is a large drawing of a man in a wetsuit riding a race car like it's a surfboard pinned up. A bed on a simple, wooden frame is set alongside the far wall. A heavy blanket with a black and white chessboard pattern is shoved into the corner. The sheets are white. [Luke] is sitting with his back to the bed's headboard, his white pillow being used as a cushion. [Luke] is yawning. There is a wireless game controller in his hand. At the foot end of the bed, a TV, only partially visible, is resting on a flat, wooden chest. There is a short, cheap looking wooden desk along the right wall, next to the bed. In front of the desk is a black swivel chair. On the desk, on the half nearest the bed, there is a plain looking desktop computer, accompanied by an LCD screen and black keyboard and mouse. There is also a purple soda can with the name THRILLER emblazoned in large silver letters. On the side of the desk closer to the door, there are two thick schoolbooks resting on top of each other, one green and one blue, with American History and European Literature written on their spines. A notebook with a red cover rests on top of those. There is also a small metal desk lamp.
Narration - “I have been called many things.”

Panel Two: [Luke] is now laying down, his upper body hanging off the side of the bed, and the blanket over his feet. The pillow is on the ground, as is the soda can with a small orange puddle on the ground around it.
Narration - “Yesterday, somebody called me a dick.”

Panel Three: [Luke] is now laying on his back on his back, fully on the bed, his head on the foot side of the bed. His legs are up, stretched against the headboard of the bed and the right wall. He is looking up at the television screen, yawning. There is an orange stain on his chin. The pillow and soda can are still on the floor, but the orange puddle is gone.
Narration - “The day before that, I was called a douchebag.”

Panel Four: The pillow now back at the head of the bed. The blanket on the floor, with the soda can under it. [Luke]'s face is planted in the pillow, and he is resting on his knees with his rear stuck up into the air. Both his arms hanging limply at his side.
Narration - “Last week, I was King of the Assholes.”

Panel Five: A close up side view of [Luke]'s face, still planted firmly in the pillow.
Narration - “When was the last time somebody called me Luke?”

Panel Six: [Luke] sitting cross-legged on his bed, pillow having joined blanket on the ground. His elbows are resting on his knees with his forearms pointing away from his body and towards each other. He is staring at the ceiling.
Narration - “I honestly can't remember.”



Page Two

Panel One: Shown over the top right corner of Panel Two. Close up of [Luke]'s ceiling aimed face, from the same level point of view.
[Luke] - “I must not have enough sugar. Time for a soda.”

Panel Two: Black and white silhouette style image of [Luke], who is depicted as white, halfway up a tall set of stairs, which are black with white lines for the edges to differentiate them from the background. The background is black. At the bottom is an open door depicted as a white rectangle. At the top is a partially open door which is depicted as a black rectangle outlined in white.

Panel Three: Set over the bottom left corner of Panel Two. [Luke], viewed from over his left shoulder, standing outside a partially open door. Yellow light is coming through the crack that the door is open, partially lighting up his face.
[Luke] - “Hey, Mom? I'm going to the gas station. Be back in a bit.”

Panel Four: Style like that of Panel Two. [Luke], white, walking along road, black with a white line separating it from the night sky. White moon in the sky. House, black outlined white, behind/to the right of him. One window can be seen on the house, near the top, which is depicted as a white square.

The best advice I can give is check out comics written by Neil Gaiman and Brian Michael Bendis. They both love talking about writing, and some of the comic collections come with scripts that'll give you a solid idea of how they can be done. You seem to have a basic idea already, but it never hurts to research. ^_^