Thanks Tev. I was trying not to remember that one.

You know you threw Yen in that machine! :dance:

Noooooo not my man card.

Now I can't work power tools.

QUOTE equals Melfice CLOSE BRACKETS SLASH QUOTE
http://i618.photobucket.com/albums/t...e/epicbead.jpg
It's a confusing thread. It's a singularly selfish thread, the most egomanical effort I've made in at least five hundred years. But people are too nice to give but the most vague of hints that it's garbage, so mostly it's a thrill-packed ride, a celebration of, well, me. Or life in general. I choose to believe it's the latter.

Anyway, it's the first time in all my life anyone's suggested I've made an epic thread. Makes me feel all warm and tingly. Seriosuly, my fingers are tingling. Of course that may be the sugar.




On reflection, it might be the thread is confusing because it's about me and no one really knows who I am. It's a fault of mine that's been mentioned before: I don't talk about myself enough. Let's have a vote: Should I write an essay about myself, or do whatever it is people do to get down from a caffeine and sugar high?

You should absolutely tell us everything about yourself now, while you're still under the influence of your drugs.

Also, pictures. Of yourself. 'Cause that's totally part of the package when you talk about yourself. Yup.

EDIT: Did I just push it...? 'Cause I really was just kidding. <__<

Well, I really don't want to put an advertisment here, it's really very tacky, and I had a long-assed cheesy post written here, but when I think about it you'll never get as much information or as many pictures of me as if you follow the link in my sig. It's a blag that's mostly me writing my autobiography. And my husband drawing pictures.

Feel free to not click it if you're not interested, DFM.

No don't.

Don't write it.

You would agree with Mesden and Fifth, wouldn't you.

Setting aside the idea that me and Mesden autoagree on anything, why would Womper get thrown in with that?

I mean we don't even agree on how his name is spelled.

Whoa, nude-art link.

And that is certainly a sentence made up of words.

I usually make avatars of Ryker or write threads about threads in the voice of that infomercial guy who died.

Raising the creepiness ante
 

Correction: No one without cameras in every room of your home and a professional surveillance team monitoring your every move really knows who you are. And FYI; you forgot to pick up milk today.

Bluff called: I almost never drink milk. :p

We're running fiberwire mainframe scans on his ISP PCP ethernet dataports, we'll have this sorted out in no time, ma'am.

Funny, this can't be right... according to our tracer bots HIS POSTS ARE COMING FROM INSIDE THE HOUSE.

Yeah, well, I also almost never drink milk.
But it certainly magically ends up in a lot of stuff I eat.

Milk is really versatile. You can't tell me you don't need milk in your household.

Bluff called: Big Brother is watching you.

Dudes, get off my turf. It's my turn to watch her.

I still have an hour on the telescope. Chill, I'll let you know when its your turn....Sweet! Shower time.

No, I don't need milk. Occasionally I luxuriate with various dairy products in my food, but even then almost never milk. I get my calcium from butter and cheese on sammiches.

Also, I just went to the store and nowhere near the shower. :)

Isn't cheese... milk?

Fun Fact: I once wrote a post detailing my shower adventures which quickly turned into a rant regarding the lack of shower cabins derailing into how Germany started both world wars (then there was a hilarious typo) on some other forums. Good times.

Wow, did you know? The words detail and derail are the same, save for one letter. Those two letters are right next to each other on your average keyboard. Fascinating.

Reading the first few responses in that thread, I must say that IQ's is more epic than yours.

I didn't mean to post something "epic", I just wanted to contribute something to the topic of showering. Maaaaaan.

EDIT: I'm pretty sure we had an orgy some pages later.

None of you is allowed to say epic anymore unless it literally concerns fighting in grand scale battles, slaying mythical beasts and gaining divine favours.

Quoting an epic post.

In my defense I'd like to point out that I used quotes.
EDIT: Well, so did Krylo, although in another way.

3 posts by Germans in a row, does that qualify as a hostile takeover?

Just don't mention the war.

I'm a great fan of what-if scenarios. I had this huge debate on the XKCD forums, what would've happened if Germany had expanded its bioweapons program.

God you're selfish. You ever think there might be people going through your things when you're not around who'd like the occasional glass of milk?

Pretty much nothing different?

Well, we might have better WWII horror stories.

Oh come on. D'you know how close Britain was to starvation during the first happy time (or whatever that period's called when U-boats were hitting shipping and convoys hadn't yet been formed)? Had the Third Reich attacked agriculture with even primitive methods (I'm talking stuff like baking Anthrax into cow treats and scattering them across pastures here; Great Britain was actually preparing such an operation, it would've been possible) and they might've collapsed. This'd require more reallocation than just dedicating more research to bioweapons, I'm aware, but employing a new strategic weapons system lies at its core.

Y'know, a few posts ago I was gonna write IN THIS THREAD WE NOW DISCUSS WORLD WAR TWO, but this is much more effective.

Germany was nowhere close to winning World War 2. It is amazing that hey survived as long as they did.
Also I'm not sure waht bioweapons they could have made that would have been more effective than just bombing them considering the industrial outlays and technical knowledge of the 40s. Anthrax into cowtreats is nearly as stupid as when the US military investigated "gay bombs" that would turn people gay and htus prevent them fighting effectively.
The first happy time wasn't particularly that bad, sure people were hungry but nowhere near collapse and die. It was no potato famine.

Plus there's that pesky Russian front.

I imagine if Germany had done better in the war America would have joined in sooner, and there would be less resentment about them only showing up to save the day when practically all the work was already done.* (Which may or may not be true.) Maybe there would even have been a lasting Russia-America alliance and we could have done something better with the last fifty years of the twentieth century than trading insults and building walls between socialism and individualism.

In an optimistic analysis. ^_^

Nah we all know the Americans won World War 2! The Russians did nothing! I saw it in a movie.
You can't tell lies in movies. They have to sign a contract before hand saying they won't.

Really the only situation I can see Germany winning involves time travelling robots.

So, what if Nazi Germany stole Einstein's time machine?

Then we'd get Dean Koontz' novel Lightning. I've been reading that just now because Life Unexpected reminded me of its excellent orphanage action.

The machine here has some funny traits by the way:
* It takes fantastic amounts of energy to open its portal, but then it can be kept open infinitely for cheap while still changing destinations.
* You can only go to the future, but then it takes the same effort to go one minute into the future as six billion years. You can carry as much junk both ways as can fit through the portal, about 2 meters in diameter.
* Returning can be done from anywhere, at any time, by pressing a button on your belt. You always return 11 minutes after departure. (Unless the plot demands otherwise.)
* You can't go to the same time twice, so you'll never meet yourself. Even though there are at least two ways to get around this rule it's decidedly impossible, and it never happens.
* You can only go further than 1988 if you're the protagonist. That's not an official rule, but there must be some reason it never happens.

Use of a time travel machine to change the outcome of a whole war is surprisingly difficult unless they can go to the future and get some kind of device which just murders opposition soldiers and not their own and plugs into a 1940s electrical socket.
I don't know if they oculd pull it off.

The United States could have never gotten along with those godless Soviets. The only reason we tolerate the Chinese is because they make toys for happy meals.

Rocky 4 proves you wrong. Truth in movies people, I'm telling you it works.

"Movies have shown their simplified picture of reality for so long that reality is now modeled after movies."

Some bitter old man said that.

I think you'd have liked him Smarty.

Also why is that picture signed White Power?

Uh... wait. How did this topic get onto World War 2 from the title? Is someone going to invoke Godwin's Lair and Invisible Queen becomes one of Those Wacky Nazis, speaking in pseudo-German and constantly berating the lower rank officers in entertaining and slightly kinky ways? *walks off babbling*

I think the tipping point was when I said "Don't mention the war". It's the surest way to initiate a conversation about the war. :)

Anyway as another sub-topic of attraction, because I happened to see a thread at the Escapist but I'm actually loath to post there, I've concieved of this:

Are you attracted to people by skin color? Like, say, do you think dirty thoughts about people of your own color or otherwise? Any particular ethnic preference? Do you not care at all? That's probably the politically correct answer.

Me, I've lived most my life among white people and I identify with them although technically my skin color is close to #888888. Persons of color are actually quite rare around here. And I think that's what makes them attractive to me. Nine times out of ten they make my heart ache and my fingers tingle in a way that less than one in ten whiteys can. I guess I just like those who are different. Is that weird?

Most people are conditioned to like the unusual to some degree and some really prefer the unusual, that's why people with lots of blondes and brunettes in their family will like redheads, or in reverse, the women in my family are all redheads and blondes, and I have a thing for dark to black brunettes.


If you're lucky. Otherwise it descends into rehashing Mony Python jokes after people run out Fawlty Towers ones(which is easy as there's only like 8 admittedly spectacular epsiodes, you can go through every good joke pretty quickly).

I hate bitter old men. Bitter young men are the way of the future.

I'm not the only one whose mind snapped to Fawlty Towers. Awesome. My girlfriend and I have coined the term "Fawlty" to refer to a situation where one has not only failed, but taken fail up like a battering ram and driven it deep into the heart of self-inflicted injury.