let's discuss air instruments
 

Air Guitar:
Pros: Classic
Semblence of rock star cool
phallic nature of instrument focuses audience to task at hand
wide variety (from using your air guitar to start air riot/smash up air equipment to gentle love song) allows you to communicate your interests
cons: very self-centered, focus on strings takes away eye contact with others
you look like a wanker
air Harmonica:
pros: Hilarious
only needs one hand
you can maintain eye contact wiht everyone
Cons: Will turn off that emo/goth chick you're trying to bang
air saxophone:
pros; Hip movements= sensuous
you're a jive cat
Hands in sync with body movement- compelling mystery presented
cons; you may be 60 years old
air drums;
demonstrate your super speed, super control, super endurance
Can mix into other dance moves the easiest
concs: You're a daterapist.

How is driving away the spooky or emotionally needy chicks a bad thing, exactly?

Spooky chicks are wild tigers, duh

ignoring the fact that goth doesn't equate to emotionally needy or bad at all and even the gothiest of gothy goths can be well adjusted and happy with life and friends.

Insensitive jerk.

Emo, though?

Air trumpet:
Pros:
- allows you to flip people off in a humorous way
- instantly recognizable even to people unfamiliar with most instruments
- you can easily get into it without losing your "hold"

Cons:
- using it to flip people off is rather immature
- most of the time it is used to flip people off

That isn't a discussion that ever has to happen because you have the whole thing anytime you say..that word..

edit: "BOOHOO I'M A WELL-OFF SUBURBAN SKINNY WHITE KID WITH THE LATEST DESIGNER CLOTHES TO EXPRESS THE CRIPPLING SADDNESS INSIDE ME"

A friend of mine does an amazing trumpet-less trumpet.

Air bagpipes gets no love.

Even normal bagpipes gets no love.

Is it just me, or do bagpipes consist entirely of one song?

Two, at most.