The Lies They Told
 

I once was a wee lad, bright eyed, strawberry hearted reading a textbook which told me that we would never be able to know what colour dinosaurs were.
10 years later and indeed that is exactly what we are doing. My childhood was a lie!

I am convinced that grade school science textbooks are not in fact written by scientists. What they don't oversimplify they just plain get wrong.

Also they all have to go through texas so

"Dinosaurs?! You mean behemoths and leviathans, right? Call them by their correct names from the book of Job, commie!"

While it isn't my fault, I still apologize for that.

I think they were right at the time. When I was a kid I was always confused why all all my text books called Russia, USSR

Lord of the Rings happened on Earth?

WHAT IS THIS SHIT

We were supposed to be overrun by an authoritarian dictatorship like, 27 years ago. Who's going to tell me whether we're at war with Eurasia or Eastasia NOW, huh? It's all wrongbadfun.

You mean doubleplus ungood?

"the moon is not visible during the day"

"Light bulbs emit transparent light"

Aah... 5th grade science..........

ah I still remember when I realized that if what they told about STDs was true then by now pretty much every human alive should be a walking plague