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"Canadian Thanksgiving" or "THE GREAT FOODENING!"
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So... yeah. It's Canadian thanksgiving this weekend. Which is so much better than that bland, boring store-bought American thanksgiving. WE GIVE THANKS TWICE AS MUCH AS OUR SOUTHERN COUSINS! (All praise the mighty turkey god. It's got chicken legs.) (I am going to get sauced! What with gravy and such. Then maybe I'll drink a little, Iuhnno. |
Clearly you have no idea how to celebrate on the correct day, when a bunch of Indian braves showed up for like five minutes or something to give the Pilgrims a deer or something before being chased off by Pilgrims or whatever the actual real true story is nowadays (since apparently anything you learned about it in school was a complete lie). Which presumably was always the third Thursday in November! It's like a fact or something (people think it's a fact, anyway? I dunno).
At least you are properly eating turkey, which Ben Franklin (or Thomas Jefferson?) actually wanted to make the United States' national bird before somebody knocked him out and stuffed him in a closet, causing the founding fathers to breath a sigh of relief and name the MIGHTY BALD EAGLE the national bird. |
I'd much rather my gobble-gobble than an endagered bird suffering from hair loss.
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Seil you seem to imply we eat bald eagles on Thanksgiving.
We only eat bald eagles on the 4th of July. |
The latest story behind American thanksgiving I heard was a governor invented it to celebrate how his troops killed a whole injun tribe without anyone getting hurt. It's uncertain if the fourth Thursday of November date has any connection to history, though.
Anyways, you foreigners have the oddest holidays. Thanksgiving is so close to xmas, and they're both celebrated mainly by eating buttloads of food with one's closest relatives. Seems kinda uninspired. Also who put all the midwinter celebrations (including new year's) basically at the beginning of the winter leaving 3-5 months of cold, unforgiving winter without any festive interruptions? I think we need to switch these things up. I move we put Thanksgiving at the end of February. Also we can make it international. |
Well presumably it was to celebrate a good harvest. Or in a bad year to celebrate not dying. Or in a year where most people died to celebrate not everyone dying. Or in a year where everyone died it would not be celebrated due to the lack of people to do so.
But let's just pretend it was invented for the sake of watching the Lions lose a football game. |
Harvest feasts are typically at the end of the harvest season, August, September or in some regions maybe as late as October, while midwinter feasts tend to have more magically significant reasons behind them. It would make sense for a pragmatic "woo we're not dead yet" feast to take place around February, when the winter gets tedious, fresh foods are rare and cabin fever sets in is what I'm saying. Wait until you're reasonably sure everyone's going to survive the winter to celebrate them not dying.
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No dinner with family this year for me.
But there WILL be pie. Pumpkin pie. One of the kings of pie. |
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And Seil, why are you assuming stuff is always store-bought? |
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