The Warring States of NPF - "Really, Resident Evil Police Station?" or "To Open This Door, You Need To Hula"

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"Really, Resident Evil Police Station?" or "To Open This Door, You Need To Hula"

So recently, I've had a look at the PSN store - particularly, the 'PS1 Classics.' I've purchases stuff like Silent Hill, and have been messing around with the idea of purchasing a few new ones. So I got one that I remembered from my youth: Resident Evil 2. You know, the one what with Leon that's not Resident Evil 4.

Anyway, I started playing in the Directors Cut mode, just messing around, having a ball, when I came across a door in the Police Station, one of the first locations in the game. 'This door is locked. A diamond is etched under the handle.' ...What the crap? I later ran into a fuse box that needed a "Rook Plug," a "Bishop Plug" and a "Knight Plug" or something like that. You know, I can understand an old European city with a rich, Cultish history to have secret passages and hidden doorways and sliding block puzzles, but this is a police station.

A police station has to be laid out in an orderly fashion, so that people can utilize it easily and efficiently. After all, they have a job to do. When you want to go to the break room, you don't want to have to need three keys and an opal. When you need to get into the bathroom, you don't want to have to need to flip a switch and light a few royals on fire.

When someone is coming into the building, they are greeted by the view of a large statue. Well, not with RE2's camera angles, they're greeted to looking at themselves. But they're otherwise treated to a view of a large statue, standing in an empty fountain, with a plaque, and a spot above the plaque for a unicorn pendant. There's journals you find of cops who'd been leaning on statues required for puzzles, and having them shift on them unexpectedly. I understand that this is all secret, and hush-hush, but really, if you're a pharmaceutical giant like Umbrella, certainly there's a better way around the whole secrecy thing than rigging the police station with twenty or so switches, themed locked doors and fire puzzles.

And it's not like this is in the basement, where no one goes, but in order to get through the building, even to your superiors office, you need to solve five or six separate puzzles. It's like

"Say Al, I heard the chief wants to see you."
"Oh shoot, and I just lent the Spade and Heart key to Jim. I guess I'll have to spend the afternoon moving statues to find him so I can see what the chief wants."

Racoon City was screwed long before the zombies came about.

This is a joke. Also, RE4 is my favorite forever. Might play that again.

Europe? What? Haven't you seen the movies, Raccoon City is in America. Duh.

Quote:

Originally Posted by Seil (Post 1165547)

The problem is that you just aren't a master of unlocking.

The question is how you find all of the brain-dead enemies in those secret passages that require an IQ upwards of 120 to enter.

Quote:

Originally Posted by Aldurin (Post 1165607)

The question is how you find all of the brain-dead enemies in those secret passages that require an IQ upwards of 120 to enter.

I think they're the people who got locked in there the last time somebody had the 3 rusty keys and the hex shaped crank, but then couldn't work out the block sliding puzzle to get back out and eventually died of starvation.

Legitimate answer time:

Hey Seil, spoileriffic answer to partially explain why the police station is set up like that.

The police chief was an Umbrella employee. In fact, I'm pretty sure the building itself was also made by Umbrella. They really do love their puzzles.

Also, you know who's not Umbrella employees?

Most of the police force.

Also, the police leave memos like "I found a sliding statue puzzle today, I wonder what's up?"

Quote:

Originally Posted by Seil (Post 1166167)

Also, you know who's not Umbrella employees?

Most of the police force.

Also, the police leave memos like "I found a sliding statue puzzle today, I wonder what's up?"

Perhaps they were all highly intelligent, philosophical police officers who appreciated the metaphorical literalization through circuitous, convoluted puzzles of the equally circuitous, convoluted bureaucracy they worked within.

Or maybe it's just the same reason there were crates in Crash Bandicoot: the game would have been half as long without puzzles and fetch quests.

Totally inefficient in a police station.

But remember, people were upset that Resident Evil 4 wasn't more like 2.

Oh wait, that has nothing to do with anything.