The Warring States of NPF - Michael Bay wants to take "Mutant" out of the Ninja Turtles.

The Warring States of NPF (http://www.nuklearforums.com/index.php)

- Media Consumption (http://www.nuklearforums.com/forumdisplay.php?f=7)

- - Michael Bay wants to take "Mutant" out of the Ninja Turtles. (http://www.nuklearforums.com/showthread.php?t=41489)

No, really, I can't.

Quote:

Originally Posted by BitVyper (Post 1189860)

It was a spectacle the way a man shitting himself on stage is. Like everyone says it's just a popcorn movie or whatever that's supposed to mean, but the whole thing is like ~2 hours of flashing lights and noise. There aren't any good visuals - there's barely even visuals at all because the direction was so shitty. The soundtrack wasn't even trying, the visual aesthetic was shit, the acting was abyssmal, the writing was basically non-existent, Megan Fox is so generic you might as well open up a Maxim, the jokes were roughly on the level of Dumb and Dumber, and the action was constantly obscured by shitty camerawork.

Michael Bay's Transformers does not deserve the excuses people make for it.

Pst. Bit. Biiiit. Biiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiit.
I can't be the only one to have noticed the irony, here.

When I first saw it, it was kind of like a lesser version of when I saw Phantom Menace: I thought, "well, I like Transformers, so I must like this", but the illusionment was dis-'ed much more quickly. It's not a good film. It's not as bad as many people make it out to be, but it's not a good film. It also highly disrespects its own franchise. And the rest just get worse (or "better", depending on who you ask - not me).

I'm still kind of holding out against hope. I loved TMNT far more than Transformers, but I've been smacked by their live action movies before (hello, TMNT 3: Turtles in Time), so I can't exactly say it'd be a new experience.

EDIT:
I also love how the "Secret of the Ooze"... was just that it was all random. Literally no secret at all. A complete accident. "OOPS THERE ARE MUTANT TURTLES NOW".

Quote:

Originally Posted by Smarty McBarrelpants (Post 1190514)

TMNT 2: Secret of the motherfucking ooze says you are wrong.

Presumably Bay is rebooting this shit, though. Which is why he can make them aliens, or be so stupid as to say they are aliens when they are not, I guess.

But yeah the ooze in the comics is supposed to ultimately have an alien origin. The movie just doesn't mention it, I guess.

I'm just not seeing how Bay could possibly be so mindless as to go from "ooze created by alien technology" to "turtles are from an alien race" and then fail to clarify this in subsequent questions from the media, as he has indeed talked about his earlier statement in a more recent statement and maintained they are aliens within it.

But Bay being really, really, REALLY stupid does seem a legitimate possibility...before now I merely thought him callous and insipid, with a serious hard-on for explosions and military equipment and military equipment exploding while soldiers scream "TANGO WHISKEY FOXTROT ALPHA! COMMENCE BOMBARDMENT AND PATROL SECTOR CHARLIE ROGER BETA!" at each other loudly for several minutes.

Quote:

Originally Posted by tacticslion (Post 1190522)

EDIT:
I also love how the "Secret of the Ooze"... was just that it was all random. Literally no secret at all. A complete accident. "OOPS THERE ARE MUTANT TURTLES NOW".

The secret was that it was rapped into being by vanilla ice.
It wouldn't be a secret if they just flat up told you. But rewatch it with this information in mind. It makes sense.

Quote:

Which is why he can make them aliens, or be so stupid as to say they are aliens when they are not, I guess.

But yeah the ooze in the comics is supposed to ultimately have an alien origin. The movie just doesn't mention it, I guess.

I'm just not seeing how Bay could possibly be so mindless as to go from "ooze created by alien technology" to "turtles are from an alien race" and then fail to clarify this in subsequent questions from the media, as he has indeed talked about his earlier statement in a more recent statement and maintained they are aliens within it.

But Bay being really, really, REALLY stupid does seem a legitimate possibility...before now I merely thought him callous and insipid, with a serious hard-on for explosions and military equipment and military equipment exploding while soldiers scream "TANGO WHISKEY FOXTROT ALPHA! COMMENCE BOMBARDMENT AND PATROL SECTOR CHARLIE ROGER BETA!" at each other loudly for several minutes.

Nobody read the comics because comics are for nerds. The ooze was made by an evil company doing evil things.

Quote:

Originally Posted by tacticslion (Post 1190522)

EDIT:
I also love how the "Secret of the Ooze"... was just that it was all random. Literally no secret at all. A complete accident. "OOPS THERE ARE MUTANT TURTLES NOW".

The Secret of the Ooze is like The Secret of Monkey Island: a title created merely to make fans go, "What is the secret of the ooze?" for years afterwards.

Quote:

Originally Posted by Magus (Post 1190531)

The Secret of the Ooze is like The Secret of Monkey Island: a title created merely to make fans go, "What is the secret of the ooze?" for years afterwards.

Exactly.

Quote:

Originally Posted by Magus (Post 1190531)

The Secret of the Ooze is like The Secret of Monkey Island: a title created merely to make fans go, "What is the secret of the ooze?" for years afterwards.

No I explained it in my post.

And the secret of monkey island is that Lemonhead is gay

Quote:

Originally Posted by Magus (Post 1190531)

The Secret of the Ooze is like The Secret of Monkey Island: a title created merely to make fans go, "What is the secret of the ooze?" for years afterwards.

I need to steal this idea.

Quote:

Originally Posted by Smarty McBarrelpants (Post 1190536)

No I explained it in my post.

And the secret of monkey island is that Lemonhead is gay

I thought it was that Guybrush doesn't like mushrooms?

How about The Transformers Meets The Last Airbender, a Micheal Bay presentation of a M. Night Shamynad film. ;)

Transformers meets Sixth Sense!

"I see transformers..."

"You're crazy, kid!"

Then it turns out Bruce Willis is the kid's PSP THE WHOLE TIME. DUN DUUUUUN.