"Are you sure we can trust her"? Roan asked Thamaturge. "I don't think Courtney will fall for her "charm", but your the boss what you say go's". "So if you need me I'll be over there "training". He said going in to a corner and tossing his basball aginst the wall.

"Well, ok. I'll go inform those two." With that, Cowman sprinted away.

He headbutted into Thaumatarge on the way to find Osterbaum. "You the one with the immaculately clean dungeon? Listen. Osterbaum is going to your throne room and is trying to steal all your soul crystals."

"WHAT??????? He's trying to pilfer my soul crystals? I'll kill him myself!"He left the evil hooded one.

He nearly dislocated Osterbaum's arm. "Osterbaum, right. Thatmatarge's throne room is just down this hallway. He says you are an oyster's bum, and can't steal a soul from a cow."

WHAT!!!!! He called me that!!!! I'll kill him!!!!!!And Osterbaum went down the needle-filled hallway.

"GLOP? There you are. You know Thaumatarge has lots of Delectable Sweeties, right. All of them are in his throne room. You know how to go there, right?" The GLOP marched off, his mind thinking about those Delectable Sweeties.

"Steven L., right? The one who laughs about trees? Listen, your mom called. And she doesn't sound pleased. Go! Your phone's in Thaumatarge's throne room." "Mom called? NUUUUUUUUUUUU!!!!!!!!" Steven L.(L for Luckless) rushed to the throne room.

As soon as the four of them reached the throne, the sky was filled with GPS-equipped, superheavy, adorned with sharp, pointy objects anvils crashed down on them. And the four of them got hurt. Really bad.

Thaumaturge pulled himself to his feet and surveyed the throne room. He was glad now that he had had the forethought to shield himself back on the battlefield. As it was, the shield had taken most of the anvil damage before collapsing, although one had gotten through, resulting in a bad cut on his left arm. "This situation reeks of hero. Hmm... If there are heros in the lair, they might be trying to reach Courtney..." He pulled out a scrying crystal, and scryed for the device which he had given Dante. In the crystal he saw a view of his library, and within it Izumo, Dante, Courtney, and a minion. That foolish guard! He should never had let her out! He looked around. This situation would have to wait - the issues with Courtney were more important.

ooc: DrmChsr0, you could have waited for us to react to your ploy. It's not a problem if there is a good reason (If we're captured, or if we've not been around for a while), but I think that you should have waited for us this time. I don't mean to sound harsh, but do you think that my character would believe a hero who has apparently just escaped from my dungeon? It's not too serious, but please try to cut back a little.

The GLOP was annoyed. It had been on the verge of devouring Osterbaum, Delectable Sweeties and all, when Cowman had come to tell them about the hoard in Thaumaturge's throne room. Inexplicably, the GLOP had decided to ignore the instant gratification made possible by Osterbaum's presence, instead accompanying Osterbaum and Cowman into the mountain lair, only to have some pointy bits of metal fall on it from the ceiling. It had hurt quite a bit, and some of the metal bits were still embedded in the GLOP's gelatinous body. It scratched absently at them with some fingernail-shaped pseudopods while it recovered.

Cowman had been right, though. There were Sweeties here. There were lots of Sweeties in Thaumaturge's and Osterbaum's nasty little pocketses ("Those things must have hit me harder than I thought," mused the GLOP, as it struggled to remain in character. "I don't even know what a pocketses is.") Determined once and for all to have the soul crystals of one or the other evil overlords, the GLOP planted itself firmly in front of the exit and sent untold hundreds of writhing pseudopods, full of Evil Overlord-Bashing Anvil Power, at both Thaumaturge and Osterbaum.

Thaumaturge almost dropped the scrying crystal in shock when the Glop's pseudopods came darting towards him, each carrying a heavy load of anvil at the end. He darted for his throne, flipped open a hidden panel, and pressed a button. Nothing happened. He pressed it again, then mashed it frantically. Finally the hidden mechanism caught, but instead of dropping down to a safely secret passage, the throne rocketed up, slamming Thaumaturge into the ceiling.

"Owww..." Moaned Thaumaturge from his eyrie. He looked over the edge. HE still wasn't out of danger. "Oh, narg." He jumped down, then ran towards the Glop. HE reached for his bag of soul crystals, brought his arm back, and shouted at the Glop: "Look! Here are all of the soul crystals that I have on me. They're your's - go and get them!" And with that he hurled the bag though a gap between the Glop's jackboots. After all, he thought to himself, I can always retrieve more from my warded storerooms.

"Gah!" Courtney jumped again, ducking out of Dante's soft and sweet-smelling arms, just in time to hit the floor to dodge some random trap that Izumo barely managed to disable.
"Thanks, dark angel person. Jeez! Isn't that trap a little thorough? Who would even come in here besides Mr. Thaumaturge himself? It's not like minions read...uh, no offense, minion-guy."

The guard shrugged genially. "None taken, we really don't read."

"Dante, you're very pretty and all, but I'm, ah, you know, not sure I'm ready for this stage in our relationship..."

She sneaked a glance at her drifting magelight. It seemed to be hovering around a shelf, high on the second level. "Of course," she thought grumpily, "Make the short girl climb." She began looking around for a ladder.

"Oh, Courtney, nobody's saying we have to do anything... we can start as friends, right?"

A minion from behind her went "Yeah righ-" and he never finished the sentence, because Succubus Dante backhanded the insolent little man with Style No. 543, the Bitch Slap.

"May your children be run over by cement trucks and your family sold into slavery, worm!" she muttered through clenched teeth.

Then she turned to Courtney and put an arm around her again, purring into her ear like the cat who's been thrown out and wants to stay in.

"Don't be afraid, Courtney... it's not so bad, is it, hmm?"

"How did you even find me here? Did someone put you up to this?" Courtney demanded of Succubus-Dante. "I liked you so much better as a nice, non-agressive, hapless mad scientist...."

Spying a ladder, the girl began edging towards it as she spoke.

Izumo watched intencly... this was getting hot, though saddend that courtny may prefer the oposite gender for he was guna ask her out.

Steven L. was upset. What kind of monster lures an unsuspecting person into a trap by telling said person that his mother is on the phone? Normally immune to god-moding, Steven L. had to run there, as it was his mother. Falling for the trap, Steven L. became furious. He quickly found his cell phone, and called his mom.

"Mommy. There are a bunch of bullies picking on me. Please help?" His face lit up. "Thank you, Mommy dearest!"

Steven L.'s mother had called everyone else's mother. Now, everyone was getting angry phone calls while Steven L. laughed hysterically.

"Puupuupupupupupuppuuu!"

Izumo glaned at courtney trying to escape... I know the master will be furius but. izumo whent to the shelf and took the book courtney needed and handed it to her and now if u trust me ill take you to the souls chamber all you have to do is hold my hand and ill warp you

Azeran chuckled softly to himself when he heard the thunderous crash of the many many GPS equipped anvils. "Looks like they fell for it," he mused. While walking down the hall, Azeran heard a conversation off to the right. Looking around, Azeran saw that it was coming from the room marked 'Library.' "That voice sounds familiar," Azeran stated. Loudly, he called, "Courtney? Are you in there? I'm coming in, ok?" In he went, Nagi Nata at the ready.

Cowman was wandering around the lair, looking for Courtney when he got a phone call. Curious, he picked it up and answered it. It was Steven L.'s mother.

"So you're the big bully my son is talking about! How dare you bully my sweet, innocent, precious angel! I have half a mind to go over there and pound you to dust!!!!"

"Madam, I assure you, he's not being bullied. On the other hand, I believe he's been lying to you about his, um, employment. He's actually working for an evil overlord, who happens to be high on bread right now." Cowman sniggered. This was going to be really funny.

Osterbaum woke up...("How did they now that anvils were my weakness...")...Just to find him self in another situation...He jumped to the ceiling evading the GLOPS little pod thingies...Yeah I mean thsoe things!

*Nokia tune playing*

"QUIET EVERYONE! It's my mom! Yes mom...No mom...I haven't been bullying Steven L.. No...It was the other guys...Well the other guys, you know...Yes I defended Steven L. No the bullies will not get out of this alive...Yes mom, I'l do a good job by being an evil overlord...Yes mom...Good bye mom." He hang up the phone. Wait...Didn't my mom got killed by some damnd heroes?
"Well anyhow...I'M GONNA KILL THE ONE RESPONSIBLE FOR THIS!!!"

Thaumaturge listened. From the elevated throne a faint ringing sound could be heard. "The phone!" Thaumaturge scrambled to a wall panel and began to type furiously. "Access the omega-drive ... command three-four-eight ... Aaargh! What's my password? Oh, yes ... re-route the subroutine ... open the socket ... execute!" Behind him the throne groaned like a wounded Earth Elemental, shuddered, then dropped like the proverbial stone. It hit the ground with a deafening crash, firing stinging shards of stone around the room. Thaumaturge hurried over to the throne, sat down, opened the left arm, and pressed a button, causing a small handset to lift out on an extensible arm. Thaumaturge took the handset, pressed a button, and put the handset to his ear.

"Thaumaturge speaking... yes, that is me... no, no, not at all... wait, ma'am..." Thaumaturge jerked the hanset away from his ear, but even at arm's-length the strident voice was like needles being forced into his brain. "But ma'am... no, ma'am... yes, I am... no, I haven't hurt your little boy... er, yes, I believe that he is... no, he works for my, er, competition... if you say so, ma'am... no, I think that it was the heroes who were trying to kill your son... yes, I think that I can get their numbers... one moment, please..."

Thaumaturge pressed a button on his 'phone, then held it to his ear again. "L337 h@x0r devision... yes, thank you... Ah, excellent. Yes, I want a trace on the numbers for all calls out of the lair... good." He pressed the button again. "Ma'am, I'll have those numbers for you in a moment." After a minute or two of chatting with Mrs. L. ("L." is for such a lovely lady, of course), the handset made a tone. "Excuse me, Mrs. L., I think that those numbers are ready..." He pressed a button, and was connected to the L337 h@x0r devision. "Yes? Excellent..." He took down the numbers, then disconnected the h@x0rs, and reconnected to Mrs. L.. "Ma'am?... yes, those number are..." he began, before reading off the numbers for Azeran and Cowman. Since Courtney had been in her room when she had called, they had been able to exclude her number.

"Yes, ma'am... thank you, ma'am... same to you, ma'am... goodbye" Thaumaturge smiled evilly. Whoever had put Mrs. L. onto his number was about to get a very nasty surprise...

Before Azeran could pull the trigger, Jackal slashed the gun in half and drove another punch into Azeran's stomach. "I have no time for you." he said, and he leapt away.
************************************************** *********

As Courtney edged backwards toward the ladder, Jackal appeared from nowhere, his arm tight around her neck. "What have we here?" he said, reaching for his helmet. His helmet came off easily, and revealed Jackal's face. Thin, sharp, handsome features, pale white skin, black hair, and foggy, lifeless eyes. Jackal was blind. "Greetings, Courtney. I am the ninja who has plagued your agents for so long a time. Azeran and I fought barehanded in the middle of a minefield in Zaire. Even though it was hardly cold, steam filled the air as he spoke. His breath was cold, yet his voice deep and soothing.

Izumo put his sniper to jakles head and his blade his neck... not today he said as he plunged a sleeping dart into jackles neck, I'm tiered of this im not evil i can make up my own mind courtney grab my had I'll warp us to safty.

Before the tranquilizer struck, Jackal whipped around and sliced the dart in half with his katana. The ninja sniffed the air like an animal and his blind gaze fixed on Izumo. Putting his helmet back on in a flash, he leapt upwards and cleaved the barrel off of Izumo's rifle. He plummeted back down and grabbed Courtney as he plunged through the floor.

ooc: Shambulator has given me permission to have the Glop go after the bag of soul crystals that I tossed.

The Glop lunged after the bag of soul crystals, affording Thaumaturge a chance to escape from the throne room. He paused, looking back at Osterbaum. Was it wise to leave Osterbaum in his throne room? He dashed back to the throne and pressed a button on the arm rest. The throne hummed, and Thaumaturge stepped back quickly as a protective ward shimmered into being around the throne. It would only drop if Thaumaturge himself cast a certain small spell, or if it ran out of power (something which would take a very long time indeed - maybe as long as three days!). That done, Thaumaturge dashed out of the door, and darted down a side-passage.

A little way down, he stopped at an inconspicuous panel. After looking around to check that no-one was watching, he made a few arcane passes of his hand, and the panel slid up to reveal a small packet, holding no more than four soul crystals - one of a number of emergency caches hidden around the base, each with its own pass-spell. With the soul crystals in hand, Thaumaturge set off towards the Library...

As the two kiddies beat their chests and kidnapped Courtney, a nearby videophone rang. Succubus Dante was just about to give it the attention it deserved - none - when suddenly a little chibi demon girl popped out of the phone and waved a little picket sign saying, "Hell is here, Miz Mizferac."

"Uhhh, it's those idiots again... When will they learn to stop bothering me..."

The picket sign changed and the little demon girl started jumping around to get her attention.

"Miz Mizferac, the dark fathers of the Inferno, the sons of the Abyss, the resplendent shadow-"

"All right, all right, I get the frigging point. Put me through."

Instantly, a blank expanse of wall which she had thought of as a sign of poverty on Thaumaturge's part (after all, most villains filled every wall they had with ego shrines to themselves) flickered, to reveal the interior of a very large cave, with nine men sitting around a square recangular table. (Of course, when I say men, I actually mean the nine Archdevils of the nine layers of Hell, but you get what I mean, right?)

Succubus Dante could make out, in no order of importance, Juiblex, Levistus, Beelzebub, Asmodeus, Belial, Mammon, G'razzt, Dispater and Mephistopheles.

"We, the high Lords of hell, do gather to reproach thee..."

"We, the keepers of the abyssal realms..."

"We, who bestow the ancient seal of suffering..."

"We, the power behind the Inferno..."

"Do gather to reproach thee..."

"Blessed..."

"Blessed..."

"Blessed..."

"Blessed..."

"Many times blessed...are we."

"Lady Mizferac."

There was silence for a moment.

Then Succubus Dante broke it.

"You shower of fucking arseholes!"

Silence again.

"Your insults are refreshingly... direct, Lady Mizferac. You have changed."

"Have you joined with a mortal?"

"So unbecoming of the Lady of Pain..."

She flashed them all the finger.

"Well, up yours and the horses you rode in on. This is my new body, and by God (here all of them winced at the mention of the G-word), I'm going to get what I came for."

"That is another issue we wish to address, Lady Mizferac. You no longer perform your duties of luring men to sin, instead encroaching on the territory of the inc-"

"Shove it, geezers. Those incubi of yours couldn't tempt a starving man with a ten-course banquet. Time to show you how a real pro does things."

"Huh huh, she said "pro", hur hu-"

Her backhand was swift, accurate, and capable of driving a grown man two feet deep into concrete. The guard's feet were still twitching as Succubus Dante turned back to the Low Council.

"As you wish, Lady Miz-"

Succubus Dante reached over and pulled the plug on the machine.

"Stupid lecherous bastards. Now.. where is she..."

After doing her hair and nails again, thanks to the help of the Lady Devil Compact she always carried, she hopped down the hole Jaguar had made, in pursuit of Courtney.

"Holy Hell! What the heck is everybody's deal! Why is everybody after me? I wish I was this popular in high school..."

Courtney fended off the chunks of floor tile that followed her and Jackal on their abrupt descent through the compound.

The ninja was intriguingly posessed of man-pretty, but the girl was hardly in a mood to stop and admire it. Suddenly becoming aware of a weight in her left hand, she realized she still had the book Izumo had thrust at her. A slight smile began to form at the corner of her lips, and she regained a bit of hope. "Bad guys don't have to stay bad forever," she thought triumphantly, "And, I suspect, any soul can be set free." Vowing to do what she could to help any of the minions who were willing to change, her right hand closing around her long-overlooked sword pendant, she braced for the impat of landing that she assumed would eventually come. How long were they going to fall, anyway?

The two of them fell eighty feet down. Jackal slammed into the floor and broke Courtney's fall, which, had she take the brunt of it, would've most likely killed her. Jackal's exoskeleton absorbed the impact, and both of them were unharmed. Or so he thought. He looked down at his chest to see a large, bloody, metal spike protruding from his kidney area. It hadn't destroyed anything, so the wound was not fatal. He released Courtney from his iron grip and tried to stand up, the spike making a sickening squelching noise as it left his body. He removed his gloves and helped Courtney up, his pale, muscular hand gently stroking her face. "Relax for a moment. You're unharmed." He sheathed his katana and held her up, blatantly ignoring his injury.

Cowman's phone rang again. It was Steven L.'s mother. Again.

"Madam? I have told you before. I did not bully your son. It was the Thaumatarge's devious lie to remove us from his evil plan. Oh, and your son is in good hands. No worries, madam. He's all right. Playing with new toys, I assume." he clicked his handphone shut.

"Now, Courtney, where are youuuu.........."

Thaumaturge was hurrying along a corridor towards the Library when one of the many wall panels began to ring (the telephones were informed of his current position so that the nearest one would ring wherever he was in the lair). He walked over and opened the panel.
"Yes? Oh, hello, Mrs. L.! Yes, it's good to hear from you. What? He said what?" Thaumaturge seethed inside, but managed not to show it. "Would I lie to you? After all, I'm in the same line of work as your son's employer - there's professional courtesy to be observed... yes, and remember that Cowman is your son's enemy - who would be more likely to lie to you?... Where is he? To be honest, I'm not sure, ma'am... Those nasty heores may have done something with him... I wouldn't know, ma'am, but I wouldn't put anything past those heroes... That's right, perhaps you ought to speak with Cowman again... All right, ma'am, I will... thank you, and the same to you... goodbye!" Thaumaturge put down the phone very carefully. When he got his hands on Cowman... but first, he needed to reach the Library, to ensure that his plans were not derailed.

Cowman's phone rang again. Steven L.'s mother, no doubt.

"Madam, Thaumatarge said what? I lie? A little extrapolation, maybe, but lie? Madam, I am not one of those heroes. I am a mercernary, a gun-for-hire, and I happen to be not paid while taking care of a sweet lil' girl who happens to be a hero. And, please thank Thaumatarge for informing you of your irate son's employment and his obvious disobedience. He's such a nice person. For a bad guy, I mean. Do remember to spank him real hard, 'kay.Bye."

With that out of the way, Cowman could search for Courtney in peace. He fell down a hole of unidentifiable origin.........

And landed next to Courtney and Jackal, who were surprised tosee him. And a little shocked. For he has no less than 15 spikes jutting out of various parts of his body. And he was still alive. "Guh.......Courtney....finally found youuuuuuu.........." was all he could manage before passing out.

Thaumaturge was almost at the Library when the phone rang again. "Mrs. L.? Why, hello... no, I seem to recall that you already knew that your son was a henchman when you first called me; someone else must have told you... Yes, that's right... It was Cowman? It wouldn't surprise me... Well, I used hero rather loosely, I admit... Ah, but he is currently in the employ of the heroes, which makes him a de facto hero... Yes, that's right... In any case, how far can one really trust a gun for hire? At least I'm open about my allegiance... Yes, you're right... Yes, ma'am, I think that it would be best for you to speak to Mr. Cowman again... Yes, ma'am... I do, ma'am... Very well, ma'am, goodbye... You too, ma'am" Thaumaturge replaced the phone. Now, if there were to be no further interruptions... He stalked down the corridor and into the Library. The first thing that he noticed was the large hole in the floor. "And I had the floors redone only last week!" The second thing was that Jackal, Courtney, and Cowman were at the bottom of the hole. The third thing was that Azeran, Izumo, and Dante were standing nearby. Thaumaturge grasped a soul crystal. "Well, Izumo, it is time to choose once and for all: which side do you serve? Will you serve me, and have a place in the coming world, or will you side with these "heroes" and face utter destruction?"

"Hmm, utter desruction will not come to htis world now. At least, not from you or Osterbaum. Now, If you'll excuse me, I have to go save Courtney. But don't you worry, Thaumaturge, I'll be back for you as soon as she's safe." With that, Azeran jumped down into the hole, periodically placing a foot against the wall and psuhing off, so he could have a controlled descent, instead of a complete freefall. When he landed down at the bottom, he noticed three things: A very injured, yet alive Cowman, Courtney, and Jackal, with an obvious wound to his abdomen. "You might want to have that looked at, Jackal," Azeran stated. Pointing his Nagi Nata at Jackal, Azeran asked, "Are you ok, Courtney? They haven't hurt you, have they?"

Osterbaum rushed out of the lair. He used his special skills to teleport him and his minions back to their lair...Where they were gonna start laying plans for the next encounter... "BUAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAA!"

*TELEPORT*

"Yes...yes...Now that I am here I must say...There's nothing that beats lair sweet lair...OF EVIL BIDDING!!! BUAHAHAHAHAHAHAA!"

And so...He started planning...

ooc: New chapter starts here.