OOC: my explanation was that you lost it in the confusion of the spam, whereupon I retrieved it from the floor. If you really don't like that explanation, however, fine, I'll play as if it had been an illusion.
IC:Alasp, finally back on his feet, got out into the hallway just in time to see Arhra stride out and make his announcement.
Alasp held one finger to his ear, thus activating a spell allowing him to communicate with Newb.
"We have a situation here. Arhra now has a ring of chaos, and he's got the calvinball. By some freak chance, I'm one of the two people between him and the goal. I really need something here that might help."
"skkrtrkt?"
"Yes, that will do fine to start with."
"sskrkskrrksst."
"That will do quite nicely. Any time you want to start, I'm ready."
An aura of light surrounded him for a moment as a spell was cast upon him, and there were no apparent changes, although those who could see magic, and could see both Arhra and Alasp were likely to get more than slightly worried.
"Initiate phase two."
OOC: Seeing as how Arhra gets a ring, one of chaos, I decided to bring in a simple little spell from D&D.
Step two is slightly more devious. For it I will require the help of an evil character and a good character.
If you would like to sign up for this little plan, please say that Newb teleported you over to where Alasp is.
Be warned, however, as one of two things will likely happen.
1) the four characters involved will be the only ones left.
2) the four characters involved will be gone for the remainder of the game.

"Just do what you gotta, man," Jada said.

OOC: For the record, I'm kinda taking a break for this game. Getting shouted at by the mods isn't my idea of a good game.

SM decided that enough was enough. Ahra was wearing a ring (that looked kinda fruity, if you know what I mean) and was about to kick some ass when he suddenly had an Idea. Instead of stealing the ring all by himself, he would form an alliance with somebody.
And so it became to pass that SM was teleported in front of Alsap by Newb.
"So...stolen any good rings lately?"

"Not yet, but with your help I might be able to. There is an ancient spell which requires four people. One of chaos, one of order, one of good, and one of evil. Right now I have a simple ring of protection from chaos spell on, which should be just barely sufficient to get us close to him so we can cast it, using him as one of the pillars of the spell."
**********************
OOC: since he has given me permission...
IC: "Let's see, who else to choose... oh, there's Jada, I should cast that demon door spell at some point, so why not now?"
Newb typed and a beam of energy passed through Jada, apparantly not harming him, and hit a door, which proptly sealed closed and grew a face. Jada, startled by this, stumbled backwards. He heard energy crackle again, and turned around in time to see another beam of energy leave his body to hit a door, transforming it as well. It seemed that Jada could now create demon doors by getting near normal doors, but he had no idea how to control it.
The nearest door opened its eyes.
"Mama?"

OOC: GrrBear my Timmies were banished
IC: BS watch in amasement as the Care bear somehow respawned from the floor
"dude you really got to stop getting your head torn off"
"oh and i hear there is a really big spell being cast that allows you to make doors come alive lets go be part of it" with that, BS jumped/climed onto Grrbear's sholder and they stomped away to find Alsap

SM waited by Alsap as he watched Jadarenidir or whatever his name is be blasted by a beam of light and be greeted by a demonic door.
"That's gotta feel strange..." SM commented.

Soldier only wished he knew a spell that could transport him to Alasp... but since he knew no such spell, he turned around and jogged the 40 feet to the point where Alasp had fallen from the sky and was now standing next to Stabbity Mage.
"Sorry, about that, I guess you're not the only one who finds it hard to tell the difference between a real and fake Calvinball these days. If you need help with the Calvin-mace Edgemaster I'll help with your spell, or I can distract him with my tapdance technique I learned in college... or something."
:fighter: "For there are times, when an enemy seeks to steal from us what we hold most dear, when a common foe would rise to hights wherein we find him insurmountablem on our own, and wherein the likes of us standing in our own pride-filled independence would surely fail. when we should unite under a single banner with our leader.
I stand ready, and I'm not even going to take into account the fact that, once we've thwarted our foe our fearless leader, Alasp, will be our fellow competator for the Calvinball. There's just too much at stake think about that. After all.... this big guy has a Band of Fruity Chaos.

"I'm just casting a spell, it's not like I'm your leader now or anything."
Alasp said as he prepared the spell.
He waved his arm over the group, pointing at Arhra, then spoke the words which activated it.
The three of them shot forwards through the air to the point where Arhra was.
Alasp thought to himself: I just have to hope that this gets the three of us rings for our own alignment, rather than baishing us all to the dungeon dimensions. But I think that I added enough energy to the spell to avoid the dungeon dimensions

Unfortunately, Arhra knows the counter to stop complex spells being cast. And that counter is to smash in the face of the person who's trying to cast the spell. Unfortunately for Newb, forcing his circle of protection up against Arhra has caused to collapse, as tends to happen when you try to hedge something out with spells like that. There's also the potential flaw in his plan that increasing the amount of magic in a spell is unlikely to prevent being sucked into the Dungeon Dimensions.

This might prove to be irrelevent though as Arhra advances on Newb like a raging god. Having just been given the title of Calvin-mace Edgemaster it doesn't look like anyone on their own will be able to stop him by force of arms alone. And he can probably shrug off any individual spells that could be cast quickly enough. He raises the Calvin-mace and brings it down, intending to smash face. Newb's face.

OOC: Ah, drama. I love it.

OOC: Now, to add my own brand of "fix Arhra's mistakes". Good old drama.

IC: Right then, the mace vanishes, followed by the ring. Followed by a horde of shrieking imps which were never previously mentioned.

All three reappear just long enough to be disintegrated by green rays of power, "Really, that's just sad." DB, now floating in midair, has grown tired of people making Discworld references he doesn't understand, and consequently Halaster Blackcloak, Szass Tam, and Manshoon are dancing about somewhere singing about wishing people a merry Christmas.

"Arhra, you've never been more than a godmoding amateur. Your childish attempts to gain superiority are laughable at best, and pathetic at worst. All your base are belong to us."