Misinformation for the Learning Masses
 

... Otherwise known as "Things that your teachers taught you that were very very wrong." Share your stories about incompetant teachers and thier conspiracy to make the children just as incompetent as they are!

Right now, I can only remember one thing, but other memories are bound to pop up eventually.

I was in the first grade, in a private catholic school. Yeah, a private catholic school. I was in my reading class, which took place in the nunnery. Yes, there was a nunnery. Which means I was being taught by a nun (who, thankfully, did not carry a ruler around with her). Anyway, she was teaching us the vowels, and this is seriously, no joking, what she taght us.

"The vowels are: A, E, I, O, U, and sometimes Y and W."

It's really bad when a teacher gets something as basic as vowels wrong.

I also find it amusing that they made a nun who knew next to nothing about computers into the computer teacher. I always had to help her out when she was teaching. So sad, so very sad.

Anyway, share your stories, so that we may laugh!

I had a math teacher in 5th grade tell me that 1.92 was smaller than 1.9 even though I argued over it for about an hour. Then in 6th grade I got my own little satisfactory when my new teacher said 1.92 was bigger.

my kindergarten teacher yelled at me for giving her a flower one time.

i gave her a crocus which i had gotten from my yard, and gave it to her, saying "here, have a crocus"
she responded by saying that it wasn't a crocus and that she knew because she was part of the "hortological group"
we ended up getting in an argument over it in which she wrote on the board that i was wrong and made everyone read it, saying that anyone who couldn't read would get a bad grade

My sophomore World History teacher was the best teacher in the world.

Reasons:

1.) He would give a handout and a homework assignment as we came into class. We were done in about 20 minutes (in a 56 minute class period).
2.) When we were done, he didn't care what we did. Some of us played cards (BS, Poker, ect.), other played GameBoys. Most of everything we did in that class was completly against the rules.

Is that awesome or what?

Also, I love to hear these stories about the idiotic teachers. One of my friends has a history teacher who is an absolute idiot. The students correct the teacher, for goodness sake! I would hardly be surprised if I heard he said, "Napoleon beat Andrew Jackson at Okinawa.", or something completly inane like that.

Then there's the psycho German teacher who actually got mooned last year. Even the teacher's pet hated her. And frankly, that's just sad.

My 8th grade science teacher took maturnity leave for the year I was in her class. We got stuck with a sub that was supposed to be some sort of science major. He tried to teach us the the Oxygen in the air was O and that Ozone was O2. I of course quickly pointed out the mistake. He responded by telling me how wrong I was. I of course opened the text book to the chapter we were assigned and pointed to this nice graphic the labled to Oxygen atoms together as the stuff in air and 3 together as Ozone. To which he responded at first I must be misintrupting the graphic. He gave in about 30seconds later and gave my the evil eye for the rest of the time I had him. Of course it didn't help when classmates raised their hands to ask me questions about what he was teaching.

My H.S. Geometry teacher was an idiot. She regularly couldn't answer peoples questions about proofs and stuff, and my best friend and I would have to show her how to do it (My best friend and I both transfered to a state Math and Science school the next year). Anyway one particular occasion she had given us a test. The last question on the test was about similar triangles, and everyone was having trouble with it. People kept asking her about it, and she was unable to help them. Finally I decided to skip ahead to that question. After looking at it for 2 minutes (it was difficult) I finally figured it out. I went to her desk and showed her how I solved it and asked if I was on the right track. She had know idea, she didn't make the test. She allowed me to show everyone else in the class how I did it though, because I did have the right answer. When I showed my best friend the first step, he figured out the rest on his own. A few others figured it out too. My teacher couldn't comprehend what I was doing.

I think is one sentence everybody has been told in elementary school. And it couldn't be more wrong.

"When you get to middle school/high school/college you will need to use cursive every day."

And my math teacher this semester

"You use trigonometry every day."
yes of course...every day I need to find the measure of 2 angles of a triangle when I know one angle is 48 degrees and it's opposite side is 6 centimeters long...yes every day I use that.

Economy teacher: Saying that today it is the 27th of Januari and our home work is due to next monday the 24th of Januari.

History teacher: Saying that World War 2 was the first big war the Japanese fought in. (Which isn't true, a war with the Mongolians comes to mind. But that is actually pretty specific, considering we don't get teached about other countries' history...)

That's what comes to mind right now. Maybe I'll edit later on.

There was also a war between the Japanese and Russians which got Teddy Roosevelt the Nobel Peace Prize. That war was so big, Japan asked Teddy to host peace talks with Russia because the fight was a standstill, but Japan was nearly broke but no one knew that (I think Teddy did though).

Actually, I have to vouch for that one. Once you get to precalc/calculus, trig becomes useful. The problem is that most teachers never tell you that trig works on things other than triangles. Then again, this quote doesn't say "You will." Thats because I can't read.

While living in the state of New York, in the Syracuse area to be specific, my 6th grade history/science (Yes, thats right, she taught both) teacher attempted to make us believe that the Grand Canyon was in Montana. Once we convinced her it wasn't, she claimed it was in New York. NEW YORK. We made her look it up in the classroom set of encyclopedias.

I had a drama teacher in high school that was fiercely opposed to alcohol. She Thought it was evil and horrible, and she didn’t understand how moonlighting as a bartender would make her a hypocrite.