Fear the Dual Lightsaber Chainsaw Gunbladechucks!
 

The pistol-grip frames, saw chains and the chains connecting the weapons in pairs are made of a molecular alloy of titanium, carbon, hydrogen and duct tape. Unbreakable the middle name of its third cousin.

The four engines are quantum based, generating their own fuel and only barely existing in this universe. They can be adjusted for time travel.

The onboard computers - that exist just as a side effect of the quantum engines - can handle any targeting and other tasks imaginable through a wireless neural interface.

The saw chains' rotation creates a harmonic resonance that cracks anything that even gets close.

The teeth of the saws consists of several hundred tiny lightsabers that cut through everything else, and generate gravitational fields that make the guns recoilless and gives the nunchucku-based spinning motion incridible speed and stability without effort.

The tiny railguns at the base of the blades have a firing rate of IMPOSSIBLE, range of HUMONGOUS, muzzle velocity of YOUR MOM and a stopping power of five gazillion kiloFUCKtons. (Actual numbers gathered from test data.)

The bullets are made from an unstable plutonium-titanium alloy, created in a separate pocket universe at the moment the trigger is pushed. They have hollow cores filled with cyanide and an anti-matter acid, and they're coated with febreeze. Their destructive force can't even be expressed in any known language.

Note: Lightsabers are property of Lucasfilms, chainsaws are property of Jason Vorhees (no really), gunblades are property of Square-Enix and swordchucks are invented by 8-bit Theater.

Beats the old febreeze-weilding tyrannosaur-riding ninja, eh? :)

Wow, that's uh... Wow.

Ain't no way I'm going near that thing.

you'll find me 40mi. away watching the nuklear explosion that follows.

Nah unless its being weilded by a ninja, and that ninja happens to be Abraham Lincoln, when not fighting John Wilkes booth.

That's not fair. Boothe PK'd him from behind, like the little botch he was.

a pistol grip on a chainsaw light saber chucks? thats a really bad idea. i can't even imagine how that would work.

It just does!

So sayeht Shiney... so shall it be! And it was good.

Something like this: