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5. Cats are retarded. Really.
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OBJECTION: Only some cats are bad as pets, in the same vein as dogs. The right v=cat can make a very good pet. Now if you are trying to say cats are mentally deficient, then you've obviously never had a cat.
Ad for drunk posting, I don't think that he's really drunk. I think he's just typing badly to see if he can fool anyone. I personally, don't plan on drinking even when I do hit 21.