[Amake]

One day Bellman was on the way to the castle and met a hobo. He pulled down his pants and asked the hobo to shit in them, and the hobo did so without any questions. This was the eighteenth century and all.
And then he met with the king, who said "Bellman, did you shit your pants?" as he noticed the smell.
"I did not, and I'll bet you a hundred gold coins you can't prove I did", said Bellman.
The king agreed and, of course, urged Bellman to drop his pants. But Bellman instead shouted to the hobo, passing on the street, "Hey there! Who shit in my pants?"
"Why, that was me", said the hobo. And so Bellman won.

Betcha that one haven't been transmigrated to no Egyptian culture heroes!

Furthermore: Once a Dane, a German and Bellman had a contest to see who could stay in a particularly smelly pig's sty the longest. The Dane went first, and came out after two minutes. "The pig farted!" he said, as he fainted. Then the German tried, and he stayed in there five whole minutes before coming out looking pretty green around the gills. "The pog farted", he gasped, gagging for air. And then it was Bellman's turn. Twenty minutes passed, and then the pig came out, fanning its snout with its foot. "Bellman farted!" it said.

And then there was the evil genie who was unleashed by the Dane, the Finn and Bellman. He said they each had to give him a challenge and if he, the genie, could do it then he would kill the fool in question. The Finn, stroking his trusty kaarves for comfort, tried: "Run around the earth in one second!" And the genie did, before his image could fade from their eyes, and brought back an orange piece of Uluru from Australia as proof. And then he cut the Finn down with a suspiciously large blade.

The Dane, shaking nervously, stuttered as he said "Run to Venus and back in one second!" And he had barely finished talking before the genie appeared with a sonic bang, bearing a little cloud of Venus' poisonous atmosphere which he stuffed down the Dane's throat.

Now Bellman was so scared he farted, but in that moment he shone up and said "Catch my fart and paint it green!" And the genie was never seen again.



...I kinda notice a theme here.