Quote:
Originally Posted by Viridis
Apparently drugging them's better than a spanking. Who knew?
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I know, right? Because all those kids who were spanked in the history of the world grew up into violent, cruel, petty people! Who drug their kids! So the moral of the story: spanking a child today, is like drugging your grandchild!
In seriousness, though, my parents recently took a young teen into their house (by parental request) who'd been forced on Ritalin for the majority of his life - to the point where the maximum allowable dosage was leaving him both out of it and still hyper-active. They forced him through six months without it, and schooling. How's it gone? Hard. Very hard, occasionally. At times, they've thought about giving up. But what'd'ya'know? After most of a year, he got better. He's actually
improved in every category
without taking the drugs and with normal, persistent,
consistent discipline*. Has he been miraculously cured of all his problems? Not hardly. But he didn't need the drugs to function normally most of the time. After nine months, they brought him to a doctor, explained the situation, had a number of tests, and, periodically, he'll go with the smallest dosage possible - this is to help him maintain
better control. But he's proven to himself and recently to his family, that he can do it
without drugs. They didn't know that before. He was, by medical view, and by social/legal view a perceived "lost cause". Obviously, that's not the case. I firmly believe we highly, highly over-medicate, as a culture, and this guy is a good example of that.
While this doesn't perfectly relate to the article, it gives a good starting point. First, we're*** over-medicated, culturally. We've seen this. We know this. We're over-prescribed, and we go with it gleefully. When you have too much of anything, it desensitizes you - you lose your respect for it, and become inclined to think it's not that dangerous, even if it still is. Most car accidents happen two miles from home for that reason. We use so many drugs, culturally, that we forget that they can be dangerous, or have bad long-term consequences. That's what I think is going on here. We look at "drugs" as a broad label, and because we're so familiar with it, we don't see the danger underneath.
Oh, one other thing: it's not that most parents of overly medicated kids are really "too busy". Try telling that to mine, who've (in addition to raising the three of us over the course of thirty years) done this while: taking care of a church and school, with one teaching full time, the other being a pastor full time (including visits and the like), sitting on a missions board, taking care of a rental home, and overseeing missions in at least four countries, being volunteer tutors, and, somehow, keeping the house in order. Also, periodically having lots of younger kids over to their house for various school parties. And going to college for certification. I'm not saying that it's easy - it's not. That's one of the things about love: it doesn't matter what else happens, love persists, persists, persists,
persists, and, when all else fails, is dead, and gone, love persists, because it's a commitment made day by day, not "how I feel today".
Aaaaaaand with that I'm off topic. /rant
*I'm not talking about spanking, or any other sort of "capital"** punishment. He's not their child, so they can't and won't do anything like that, but he is in their house, under their authority.
**Seriously "capital punishment" is how some refer to spanking. Really?
Really? "Capital"? Sorry, off-topic.
***I'm not talking about any one person, nor indicating that all people in my culture fall into this category.
EDIT:
Quote:
Originally Posted by Ryanderman
If you're spanking a child with the same attitude or in the same way as slamming doors or losing your temper, you've entirely missed the point of spanking and are on the border of (or crossed over, gotten a job, bought a house, and married a local) abuse. So in that context, I think depending on the drug, I might see that as better than spanking.
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This is absolutely true. Spanking is not supposed to be an anger reflex - that is wrong and means you've lost self control. I underwent the spanking treatment, but oh, man, what I remember most of all about that? The fact that my parents sent me to my room to
wait for it, while they calmed down. Also, the subsequent long explanations of
why I was about to get spanked once they came back, and why that was wrong, and that let me know what not to do again! Also, the spanking itself was kept brief.