See, company parties always follow one rule. Always follow the boss' example. The boss getting right plastered? Then you are allowed, nay, obligated to consume as much liquor as your body will allow. Boss taking it easy? You should do the same.
One time after the staff golf tournament where I used to work, my very drunk (admittedly MILF) boss took a pass at me. It will go down in my autobiography as one of the most terrifying moments of my life. Instead I actually managed to flirt my way out. And by flirt my way out, I mean flirt for a little bit and then yell "Hey Steve! You need help with that!" and scamper away like a spider monkey fleeing fire.
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Originally Posted by DFM
I would kill all the puppies.
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