If you're going to lie, at least tell a lie you can cover up

[Kim]

So, today was my first day in Japanese class. Very good time. Learned a few things, have some Japanese homework, and overall it just feels nice to be really learning things again. Good times.

Anywho, beginning of the Japanese class, the teacher tells us to talk to the person next to us and find out three things about them, because rather than them introducing themselves, our job is to introduce our neighbor, and our neighbor will introduce us. Good idea since everyone needs to know at least someone in the class so we can practice and shit.

The three things we needed to know:

1. The other person's name
2. Why they're taking the class
3. Random other stuff

So, my neighbor's answer to number two is that he actually lived in Japan for a while, came back and wanted to brush up on the language before moving back after this semester.

So yeah, he's totally full of shit. There were other lies, like his explanation for how he totally snuck into TGS, but those other lies are irrelevant, let's just focus on the main one. Now, if you have lived in Japan for a while, I doubt you need to be taking Elementary Japanese 1A. Maybe try Japanese 2A, at the very least? If you HAVE to take Japanese 1A, for whatever reason, you aren't heading back after just that class. Not a very good lie. If you're going to lie, lie well.

His lie completely fell apart when we had to do vocab practice. His pronunciation was... pretty awful. Like incredibly fucking awful and he couldn't read the words for shit. Under normal circumstances I wouldn't criticize him. After all, I'm sure people could point out plenty of mistakes I made, it's his first day in the class, etc etc. BUT! If you make such a boldfaced lie that you totally lived in Japan for a while and then cannot even fucking pronounce the words you deserve every bit of mockery you get. You brought it on yourself.

Today's moral: Don't lie beyond your ability to cover up.

Anyone else got good bad liar stories?