"Inseminated People Given Same Rights As Adopted People" or "Why Wasn't This Law?"

[Seil]

Because the title is less descriptive than I'd hoped, the actual thing is that children who're born through anonymous sperm donors are now being given the same rights as children who're adopted.

Here's the article.

Now I dun know, 'cause I've never donated sperm, but I think that this is a good thing. A while back we talked about issues like adopted kids seeking their biological parents, and I've got to wonder why this wasn't law in the first place. Like I said, I've never donated sperm - which is an awesome thing, people who want kids being able to have them is awesome - but I thought that most people donated for the financial aspect rather than the altruistic aspect. I mean, you donate blood here in Canada, you're donating for a reason - lives will literally be saved thanks to your contribution. But sperm donation?

[TDK]

So reading the article basically this started because a girl conceived using donated sperm wanted to meet her father, and the doctor wouldn't give her the information because the donor wished to remain anonymous? And now the court is saying the girl is in the right?

That's a bunch of bullshit. You have every right to remain anonymous, just because you donate sperm - a fairly charitable act, monetary gains aside - doesn't mean you should have to deal with a kid down the line just because "I NEVAR MET MY REAL DADDY!!1!"

[Fifthfiend]

Originally Posted by TDK

That's a bunch of bullshit. You have every right to remain anonymous, just because you donate sperm - a fairly charitable act, monetary gains aside - doesn't mean you should have to deal with a kid down the line just because "I NEVAR MET MY REAL DADDY!!1!"

Phrasing the perfectly valid desire of a child to know something about / meet their biological father using poor spelling and multiple exclamation marks (and a number 1) certainly is an effective criticism.

I know that I for one have suddenly lost any sympathy for an uncertain young person maybe wanting to know a bit more about themselves and where they came from.

[Osterbaum]

It's a question of the rights of two people; the donors right not to get involved beyond donating sperm and the child's right to know who his biological father is. There's no (easy) answer to which right is more important.

You have every right to remain anonymous, just because you donate sperm - a fairly charitable act, monetary gains aside - doesn't mean you should have to deal with a kid down the line just because "I NEVAR MET MY REAL DADDY!!1!"

I mean, it might be easy for you or me to just claim I NEVER MET MY DADDY isn't a good enough reason but then again we aren't in that sort of situation.

[Kim]

I will say if you donated the sperm under the assumption you were going to be anonymous, you should be able to remain anonymous. I think a better question going forward is whether people should be able to donate sperm under that assumption in the future. I could go either way on it.

[Karrrrrrrrrrrresche]

Originally Posted by NonCon

I will say if you donated the sperm under the assumption you were going to be anonymous, you should be able to remain anonymous. I think a better question going forward is whether people should be able to donate sperm under that assumption in the future. I could go either way on it.

I agree there, I'd see this as a worthwhile precedent in the future but lots of sperm donors did so explicitly with the understanding they'd be anonymous. Retroactively taking that away seems a bit too far for my taste.
Even with that in mind I'd still think that the anonymous donation system works in my eyes, a child might want to know and maybe given enough time the biological father could be given the option to agree to a meeting, but I don't think the doctors should ever just be handing the information out to the kids because they ask.

[Bard The 5th LW]

I don't really know the best way to phrase why, but I support anonymity of the donor when they wish to stay anonymous. I suppose I can see why someone would want to know, but the choice to do it anonymously should be respected.

[Fifthfiend]

Anyway - I can certainly see where this could lead to bad results for a kid doing this, cause hey, there's a pretty good chance you're going to find out that your biological dad was... kind of a scuzzball. Or maybe a relatively okay guy who you just can't relate to at all, IDK. But as long as the people doing that are warned about it up front not to expect anything, then sure.

I guess I can maybe see where this would be uncomfortable for some guys, who maybe don't want someone turning up on their doorstep being like HEY I'M WHAT YOUR SPERM DONATION TURNED INTO, and I mean, it could certainly generally end up complicating things for the families that do this kind of thing, but I don't know if any of those possibilities constitute a valid reason to legally deny someone access to this information about their parent.

EDIT: and I think the article makes a good point that there are also some pretty valid health reasons for knowing who your biological parent is; someone needing information about their risk for medical conditions or searching for a bone marrow donor or some shit shouldn't need to die just because someone's uncomfortable with knowing where their sperm ended up.

[Krylo]

Originally Posted by Fifthfiend

EDIT: and I think the article makes a good point that there are also some pretty valid health reasons for knowing who your biological parent is; someone needing information about their risk for medical conditions or searching for a bone marrow donor or some shit shouldn't need to die just because someone's uncomfortable with knowing where their sperm ended up.

All (should be, in most cases) on file, except the donor thing. In which case, yeah maybe a doctor could contact the biological father. They test for all kinds of congenital diseases and what not before using the sperm.

I don't see where this compares to adoption though. It's an entirely different ball park. If you were adopted your biological parents actually conceived you, maybe one or both of them had reasons beyond just not wanting a child, for putting you up for adoption.

With sperm donation it's usually just some guy wanted the fifty bucks. In cases where that ISN'T true, it's a situation where the family raising the child knew the donor, anyway.

There's no reason besides health that the anonymity should be compromised. And the only time health becomes a reason, with all the tests that you have to have available when you donate sperm, is when you need a transplant. And for some reason your biological sperm donor father is the only person available.

Beyond all that, you also have to consider that one donation can make anywhere from 10-20 kids. It seems pretty unfair to expect some guy who donated sperm once to deal with 10-20 people showing up at his doorstep, potentially complicating the fuck out of his life, just for that.

I just have to seriously question why anyone would need to know this badly enough to compromise someone else's right to anonymity.

[pochercoaster]

Originally Posted by Krylo

Beyond all that, you also have to consider that one donation can make anywhere from 10-20 kids. It seems pretty unfair to expect some guy who donated sperm once to deal with 10-20 people showing up at his doorstep, potentially complicating the fuck out of his life, just for that.

Sounds like some B movie.

Beyond medical conditions which, as others have pointed out, is kept on file at the time of the donation, there doesn't seem to be a good enough reason to infringe on someone else's privacy. The donor is barely involved in the process...

Dumb question: Do donors know if/when their sperm is given to someone? What if a 20 year old donates his sperm, lives for another 20 years and meets a 20 year old hottie who's into old dudes? >_> (My parents are 21 years apart. It's possible! >_>)