Turn me into the belle of the ball

TopHatAssassin · 03-19-2011, 09:34 PM

Short version: I'm going to the Althouse High prom and need to look good for the girl. How do I look sexy and play the part of the gentleman?Long version:

Gentlemen of NPF (and ladies too, your input is always valued), I come before you a man with greater aspirations of dapperness and handsome-osity. You see, on April 9th I will be attending my faculty's grad formal. All the cool teacher candidates will be there, the girl of my dreams included (I'm going with her, actually). What I want to do is cut a striking figure in both dress and demeanour. Given my upbringing, proper manners are pretty much second nature, so I'm not too worried about that. It's the dress that concerns me.

I have, in my closet: a grey fedora, a lavishly-decorated top hat, a vest that fits me (yet is a relic from my late childhood, so I don't know if it fits fits me), a number of ties, and a white dress shirt that requires cufflinks (which I also have).

I plan to hit up a local men's store to get anything else I require, but that's the trouble. I don't quite know how to look dapper and suave, so I don't know what to look for in order to do so. I'm a jeans-and-t-shirt kinda guy on any given day, with shorts standing in during the summer months. I have an amorphous beard, the shape of which never seems to match the rest of my face and works in tandem with my hair (which needs a trim) to throw everything off. I also have this terrible tendency to lean toward extravagance and go overboard (it's the latent showman in me), but I will not be doing that for this function as it would probably be an embarassment to my ladyfriend or some kind of hindrance to my totally gettin' with her (probably both!)

So, I need help. Gentlemen, how do I bring sexy back?

NOTE BESIDE: I should mention that she has brought up the idea (and is totally down with) coordinating outfits. There are three of us: myself, the lady, and a buddy of ours from the faculty (he and I are total bros). I need to see if she has any ideas, but if nothing comes up soon I'm flying solo in the outfit department. She sounded excited when I mentioned myself dressing up as a pimp, so I'm not sure how to go from there. :P

Also, some background info on her, I guess. She knows I'm into her (or should at least, when I explicitly told her after she declined my offer to go out). We're still good friends, so she isn't totally offended by me. We spent an awful lot of time together this past semester, so that's strikes me as a good sign. My friend (our third member) knows I'm into her, and he's been trying to help out where he can. I liken him to a very capable aide, but I don't want him doing the legwork. I have to earn this!

I'm chiefly concerned with how to act around her (aside from normally), I suppose. Like, do I get her a corsage? Should I, even though this isn't a date? I kinda want to, but I don't want to scare her off. Do I go to her house rather than have her drive up to mine? She's closer to the formal's location, and I honestly don't mind looking so damn fine on the city bus to meet up with her. Would it be bad form to drop in and potentially make her feel like she has to rush to get ready? Questions abound!

It's just that this whole thing is new to me. I want to do things right. She's really cool and I don't want to mess things up. If I didn't know any better, I'd say I was in love. :P

Azisien · 03-19-2011, 09:38 PM

Do it.

If you're going to be a bear, be a grizzly.

**McTahr** · 03-19-2011, 10:30 PM

In terms of coordinating outfits: don't match the suit, match the accessories. Pair up the tie and kerchief. Plain matching suit jacket/pants is best, blazer and relatively similar colored pants at least. Tux is obviously overboard. Vest makes you look like a goof for generic formal functions. Fedora should match if you wear it at all, I honestly would not.

Cut your hair. Shave. Shave or I will cut you.

If you do full-on coordinating outfits, a shirt that is a shade or two off from the tie/kerchief is fine. Ideally you don't want them identical or too close.

If you don't coordinate, a nice black/red contrast is standard fare and red is generally a favorable color for attraction. Science says so.

No corsage unless she brings up the potential idea of flowers. It's suggestive and forward.

Suggest the idea of carpooling. Include your friend. Don't make it a date, she's already turned you down once, no sense making her uncomfortable.

And good luck!

Professor Smarmiarty · 03-20-2011, 03:58 AM

Go naked. It'll work. Guaranteed

Krylo · 03-20-2011, 06:56 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by TopHatAssassin

she declined my offer to go out

Only important sentence.

Professor Smarmiarty · 03-20-2011, 07:41 AM

But he wasn't naked at the time.
I'm assuming.

rpgdemon · 03-20-2011, 10:41 AM

I personally go with a deep purple vest, whenever I need to look my classiest.

TopHatAssassin · 03-20-2011, 11:09 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Azisien

If you're going to be a bear, be a grizzly.

I would, but teddybears don't get laid. :P

Quote:

Originally Posted by McTahr

In terms of coordinating outfits: don't match the suit, match the accessories. Pair up the tie and kerchief. Plain matching suit jacket/pants is best, blazer and relatively similar colored pants at least. Tux is obviously overboard. Vest makes you look like a goof for generic formal functions. Fedora should match if you wear it at all, I honestly would not.

Could I forgo a jacket entirely? It seems doable in my mind, but that's a far cry from how it would actually look in practice. It seems like you'd need something up top to make the whole thing look more balanced (even suspenders, an item which my friend has acquired and will be wearing). Same goes for the hat; I think I could pull it off, but I'm not sure.

Quote:

a nice black/red contrast is standard fare

This sounds exceptionally awesome, and I will endeavour to acquire a red shirt.

Quote:

No corsage unless she brings up the potential idea of flowers. It's suggestive and forward.

Suggest the idea of carpooling. Include your friend. Don't make it a date, she's already turned you down once, no sense making her uncomfortable.

Duly noted. Our plan is actually to carpool, which works out rather nicely.

Quote:

Originally Posted by Smarty

Go naked. It'll work. Guaranteed

It's a bit too cold still for that. Something to consider, though.

Quote:

Originally Posted by Krylo

Quote:

Originally Posted by TopHatAssassin

she declined my offer to go out

Only important sentence.

I'm nothing if not stubborn!

Quote:

Originally Posted by rpgdemon

I personally go with a deep purple vest, whenever I need to look my classiest.

School colour, too!

I'm seeing gradients in my future.

Bobbey · 03-20-2011, 11:12 AM

I agree about wearing some form of clothing that is red (preferably a tie). Red is a very attractive color and is usually associated with power, a trait that attracts many women.
How long is your beard? If it's a long beard (more than two inches or somewhat) I'd recommend shaving, but not necessarily completely. If you can have that ''two day'' beard look (I think you might understand what I mean), that also looks very good and distinguished. Also, good shoes are a plus, but maybe that's only just me.

As for her declining your first offer but still hanging out with you, I'd say there still might be something there, but I'm really talking out of personal experience here. A few years ago I was really into this guy in one of my bands, so I decided to ask him out. It didn't turn out so well since not only he declined but he stopped talking to me on msn for about a week, which felt weird because we used to talk to each other each day and see each other at least once a week for rehearsals. We still hanged out afterwards and two months later, he had changed his mind. Even though we're not together anymore, we still talk almost everyday and we both have a boyfriend/girlfriend as well. So, what I'm saying is, tread the water carefully: she knows how you feel about her, now you have to wait and see if she'll take action to show how exactly she feels about you.

rpgdemon · 03-20-2011, 11:14 AM

I think the main thing is, just try to look good, and if you do something unconventional, either go with it fully, or don't do it at all. You can't show up jacketless, then be, "Oh, yeah, sorry, I blah blah blah", or show up with a hat, then quickly discard it.

I've taken to wearing any one of a number of hats around, for the past year or two, and they are all excellent.

03-19-2011, 09:34 PM	#1
TopHatAssassin Like a millionaire Join Date: Nov 2005 Location: Canada Posts: 637	Turn me into the belle of the ball Short version: I'm going to the Althouse High prom and need to look good for the girl. How do I look sexy and play the part of the gentleman? __________________ Aye, num nums indeed.

03-19-2011, 10:30 PM	#3
McTahr For the right price... Join Date: Sep 2006 Posts: 1,268	I'm talking in dumb dumb sentences because I am tired. In terms of coordinating outfits: don't match the suit, match the accessories. Pair up the tie and kerchief. Plain matching suit jacket/pants is best, blazer and relatively similar colored pants at least. Tux is obviously overboard. Vest makes you look like a goof for generic formal functions. Fedora should match if you wear it at all, I honestly would not. Cut your hair. Shave. Shave or I will cut you. If you do full-on coordinating outfits, a shirt that is a shade or two off from the tie/kerchief is fine. Ideally you don't want them identical or too close. If you don't coordinate, a nice black/red contrast is standard fare and red is generally a favorable color for attraction. Science says so. No corsage unless she brings up the potential idea of flowers. It's suggestive and forward. Suggest the idea of carpooling. Include your friend. Don't make it a date, she's already turned you down once, no sense making her uncomfortable. And good luck!

03-20-2011, 10:41 AM	#7
rpgdemon Not a Taco Join Date: May 2005 Posts: 3,313	I personally go with a deep purple vest, whenever I need to look my classiest. __________________ I did a lot of posting on here as a teenager, and I was pretty awful. Even after I learned, grew up, and came to be on the right side of a lot of important issues, I was still angry, abrasive, and generally increased the amount of hate in the world, in pretty unacceptable ways. On the off chance that someone is taking a trip down memory lane looking through those old threads, I wanted to devote my signature to say directly to you, I'm sorry. Thank you for letting me be better, NPF.

03-20-2011, 11:12 AM	#9
Bobbey I mustache you a question. Join Date: Jan 2006 Location: Laval Posts: 768	I agree about wearing some form of clothing that is red (preferably a tie). Red is a very attractive color and is usually associated with power, a trait that attracts many women. How long is your beard? If it's a long beard (more than two inches or somewhat) I'd recommend shaving, but not necessarily completely. If you can have that ''two day'' beard look (I think you might understand what I mean), that also looks very good and distinguished. Also, good shoes are a plus, but maybe that's only just me. As for her declining your first offer but still hanging out with you, I'd say there still might be something there, but I'm really talking out of personal experience here. A few years ago I was really into this guy in one of my bands, so I decided to ask him out. It didn't turn out so well since not only he declined but he stopped talking to me on msn for about a week, which felt weird because we used to talk to each other each day and see each other at least once a week for rehearsals. We still hanged out afterwards and two months later, he had changed his mind. Even though we're not together anymore, we still talk almost everyday and we both have a boyfriend/girlfriend as well. So, what I'm saying is, tread the water carefully: she knows how you feel about her, now you have to wait and see if she'll take action to show how exactly she feels about you. __________________ The key to being a big league pitcher is the 3 R's: readiness, recuperation, and conditioning! You see, after the game, a lot of guys like to ice up their arm. Still, other fellas think that heat is the way to go. But I have discovered the secret, Henry: hot ice! That's right: hot ice. I heat up... the ice cubes! It's the best of both worlds! -Phil Brickman

03-20-2011, 11:14 AM	#10
rpgdemon Not a Taco Join Date: May 2005 Posts: 3,313	I think the main thing is, just try to look good, and if you do something unconventional, either go with it fully, or don't do it at all. You can't show up jacketless, then be, "Oh, yeah, sorry, I blah blah blah", or show up with a hat, then quickly discard it. I've taken to wearing any one of a number of hats around, for the past year or two, and they are all excellent. __________________ I did a lot of posting on here as a teenager, and I was pretty awful. Even after I learned, grew up, and came to be on the right side of a lot of important issues, I was still angry, abrasive, and generally increased the amount of hate in the world, in pretty unacceptable ways. On the off chance that someone is taking a trip down memory lane looking through those old threads, I wanted to devote my signature to say directly to you, I'm sorry. Thank you for letting me be better, NPF.

03-19-2011, 09:38 PM	#2
Azisien wat Join Date: Jan 2005 Posts: 7,177	Do it. If you're going to be a bear, be a grizzly.

03-20-2011, 03:58 AM	#4
Professor Smarmiarty Sent to the cornfield Join Date: Mar 2007 Location: K-space Posts: 9,758	Go naked. It'll work. Guaranteed

03-20-2011, 07:41 AM	#6
Professor Smarmiarty Sent to the cornfield Join Date: Mar 2007 Location: K-space Posts: 9,758	But he wasn't naked at the time. I'm assuming.