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Unread 05-10-2011, 10:35 AM   #251
pizuz
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Quote:
Originally Posted by InsaneGenius View Post
Actually, from what I remember of Matt's script, it was supposed to be more formal than Quentin Tarantino, so I went with that.

I didn't catch the lack of the umlaut myself when I got the page though. I blame... the size and stuff.
I can imagine such intentions, but no native German author would write like that, even if it were meant to be formal Some lines simply sound like being run through Google Translate
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Unread 05-10-2011, 12:10 PM   #252
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Ahem, I'm pretty sure I'm the native German who translated those lines.
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Unread 05-10-2011, 12:17 PM   #253
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Does that mean we get to all start mocking your english now?
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Unread 05-10-2011, 12:24 PM   #254
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I'm not sure who I'd like to be less right now.
IG for the insult, or pizuz for the foot that must be jammed so far up his mouth right now.
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Unread 05-10-2011, 12:32 PM   #255
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I would have gone with "zu deinem eigenen Hinterhalt" but I just found out Doppelspiel is an existing German word. So that works.

Panel 4 does sound a little off, though; how about "Ich erschieße einfach alle / ich werde einfach alle erschießen und hinterher sehen, wen ich hintergangen habe" ("wem ich in den Rücken gefallen bin" would also work and flow a bit more naturally, I think). And I'd add a "Nein" in the last panel, second bubble, to emphasize the immediate dismissal of his first thought ("Nein, wenn ich es mir recht überlege"; "nein, eigentlich" would be more concise).

(hope I'm not stepping on your toes here, IG, I'm just very interested in translation. )
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Unread 05-10-2011, 12:52 PM   #256
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No offense taken. In translation there always are more than just one option. In fact, I always criticize other people's translations myself because I'd do certain things differently.

As for the doppel-/dreifachspiel I had to look that up myself, apparently it's rather outdated, which shouldn't be much of a problem in a fantasy wild west setting. I pretty much just looked for a way to preserve the double and triple-crossing given in the script without stretching it too much.

Your other points are valid too, When translating I tend to stick with the original tense, even when it's not necessary.

Quote:
Originally Posted by rpgdemon View Post
Does that mean we get to all start mocking your english now?
English is spelled with a capital letter. My intuition also tells me that "we all get to" sounds more right, though I can't say "get to all" is entirely wrong fo sho.


I also did not intend to jam my foot anywhere.
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Unread 05-10-2011, 12:59 PM   #257
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Originally Posted by InsaneGenius View Post
English is spelled with a capital letter. My intuition also tells me that "we all get to" sounds more right, though I can't say "get to all" is entirely wrong fo sho.
Well, I'm not saying that -I- speak English well, heck, half of my sentences are formed by wondering how I can most blatantly restructure the English language, while still being technically maybe correct.
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Unread 05-10-2011, 12:59 PM   #258
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Hoppla No, sorry, that wasn't my intention. Nicht im Geringsten...

Anyway, if you insist on formal speech, I'd write "War das ein Donnern?" or "...ein Gewitter?" (she might refer to a thunderstorm here) and "sondern eher nach... Explosionen". Also "Oder spielst du etwa ein dreifaches Spiel?".

And now I'll shut up.
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Unread 05-10-2011, 01:06 PM   #259
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Nope, you're not allowed. You are going to chill with us and continue posting indefinitely.
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Thank you for letting me be better, NPF.
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Unread 05-10-2011, 01:08 PM   #260
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Yeah, something like "Ein Gewitter? Nein, eigentlich klang das nicht nach Donner..." would work a little better than having "Donner" there twice. Good call.

Quote:
Originally Posted by rpgdemon View Post
Well, I'm not saying that -I- speak English well, heck, half of my sentences are formed by wondering how I can most blatantly restructure the English language, while still being technically maybe correct.
I just throw darts at a dictionary and hope cantaloupe the best.
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