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Unread 07-27-2021, 12:07 AM   #1
POS Industries
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Default I'm going to PISS on Elon Musk's shitty space car

In the year 2047, some garbage Elon Musk shat out into space will perform a near-Earth flyby and I want to urinate on his car. In space. This is currently impossible because of both the freezing temperatures that the piss would have to exist in and the body-destroying vacuum of space that I would not be able to unzip my space-trousers in order to drain my gorn on an overpriced electric car, the cost of building and launching into the Final Frontier could have--actually, hang on, let me google this to find out what actually meaningful thing for society that money could have gone to instead. Give me a minute here.

$90 million for the rocket, $200k just for the FUCKING CAR.

Well, I'm no public service budget expert, but it's a lot for something that stupid, so now I must spend the next 26 years of my life dedicated to keeping my piss liquid in space and being able to eject it in a stream at an awful car traveling over 2000 mph, but I'll do it because there has to be SOME justice in this dying world.
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Unread 07-27-2021, 10:58 AM   #2
The Artist Formerly Known as Hawk
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Bad day?
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"ROOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOAR I AM A GIANT SPACE TURTLE!!!"
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Unread 07-27-2021, 11:25 AM   #3
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The cost of developing a way to keep your piss liquid will probably be lesser than the space car cost, and the potential benefits for society will inherently be greater (inasmuch as putting a car in space helps absolutely no one do anything but there are potential uses for maintaining fluid states, not to mention the worldwide morale boost it would be to watch). I encourage this.
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Unread 07-27-2021, 01:15 PM   #4
POS Industries
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POS Industries will strap all reputation givers to balloons and kidnap them. POS Industries will strap all reputation givers to balloons and kidnap them. POS Industries will strap all reputation givers to balloons and kidnap them. POS Industries will strap all reputation givers to balloons and kidnap them. POS Industries will strap all reputation givers to balloons and kidnap them. POS Industries will strap all reputation givers to balloons and kidnap them. POS Industries will strap all reputation givers to balloons and kidnap them. POS Industries will strap all reputation givers to balloons and kidnap them. POS Industries will strap all reputation givers to balloons and kidnap them. POS Industries will strap all reputation givers to balloons and kidnap them. POS Industries will strap all reputation givers to balloons and kidnap them.
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Quote:
Originally Posted by The Artist Formerly Known as Hawk View Post
Bad day?
Every day is a bad day so long as that awful car goes unpissed.

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The cost of developing a way to keep your piss liquid will probably be lesser than the space car cost, and the potential benefits for society will inherently be greater (inasmuch as putting a car in space helps absolutely no one do anything but there are potential uses for maintaining fluid states, not to mention the worldwide morale boost it would be to watch). I encourage this.
I truly believe that giving that dumb car for rich idiots and the stupid fake astronaut inside a taste of The Forbidden Tang will be the event that finally brings about world peace, thank you for your support in this matter.
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Unread 08-14-2021, 09:52 AM   #5
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I miss the days when a thread like this would inspire dozens if not hundreds of painstakingly typed responses, about half of which would erroneously but earnestly defend Musk as an innovative entrepreneur. And then like, 20 posts in the subject would randomly change, someone would inevitably post homophobic, transphobic, sexist or racist remarks (even when the content was originally about a white cisgendered man), the thread would descend into ad hominem attacks, the moderators would reluctantly become involved, and I'd eventually show up and throw down some 10,000 word holier than thou Snakepost essay that no one -- not even myself -- would ever read again.

Ah, yes...those were the days.

But yeah Elon Musk should be captured and eaten by cannibals
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Unread 08-31-2021, 11:45 AM   #6
Bard The 5th LW
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The car is going to land on a planet with sentient life, explode because its a Tesla, and then trigger War of the Worlds.
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