[buttz tag here plz] NPF Chapter 1: Meh-herp-e-derp

[Aldurin]

Uh, your head. Well, at least you think it's your head, heard to tell when wearing an avatar all the time. As your vision clears, you see the forums in shambles around you. From what you can tell, one of the subforums collapsed on around you, blocking off any links needed to exit. Other around you start to wake up and take in the surroundings. The forum clock is visible, but bouncing back and forth between 4 hour increments (at least that is working normally). A single thread is open, though the posts are destroyed and the reply button looks like it's barely clinging to the wall.

[Day 1 starting processes]

Token C and Token H get admin powers, which immediately brings permabans upon them both, rendering them unable to do anything period. Token C fails to make a derpitude save against the banning and dies on the spot.

Osterbaum is currently impaled on a stray phallus and cannot move, but still alive.

Member list:
Osterbaum (critical condition)
Insanegenius
akaSM
Hawk
CABAL49
Kyanbu the Legend
Magus
Fifthfiend
Flarecobra
Loyal
Eckscizor
Shyria Dracnoir
Thadius
Whomper (currently dead from being NOT-Whomper)
Synkronized
Amake
Smarty McBarrelpants
Geminex
Bitvyper
Satan's Onion
Mauve Mage
Relm Zephyrous
Betty Elms
Token A
Token Wright
Token C (slain by perma-ban Day 1)
Token D
White Token
Token F
Token G (slain by vote missile)
Token H (currently perma-banned, but alive)
Token I
Token J
Token K
Token L (slain for inactivity)
Token M (slain by Token Wright's wrath)
Token N (see Token M)
Token O (critical condition)
Token English

Token Noir

Fenris (pinned to the wall by phallus)

What will you do?

[Osterbaum]

'uuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuggggghhhhhhhhh' is the sound I make while paralyzed by phallus impalement

[Aldurin]

Token L is GM-slain for inactivity. Token E becomes White Token due to racial inequality complaints.

[Loyal]

Originally Posted by Aldurin

Token L is GM-slain for inactivity. Token E becomes White Token due to racial inequality complaints.

Leave it to Earl to fuck things up within hours of taking the job.


Yes, there may be some complaints of racial inequality, but there's no way they could stem from a lack of white people on the forums.


Just one look in the Camwhore Thread should pretty well demonstrate the opposite, in fact.
This fresh influx of Tokens has been exactly what the forum needed.


The only thing you could hope to accomplish by whitewashing Token's heritage is making the problem worse!


Besides, what would poor Raptacular Haberdasher think?

[The Artist Formerly Known as Hawk]

Originally Posted by Loyal

Besides, what would poor Raptacular Haberdasher think?

Oh crap now you've done it. I foresee another impromtu rap battle showdown in our near future.

[Token]

Originally Posted by Loyal

This fresh influx of Tokens has been exactly what the forum needed.

Okay that has never been true at any point in history.

Token A: Move Token B onto Quest Bed.

Token B: Choke to death, ascend to Tokenworth Tier. Wait for clients.

Token D: Facepalm

White Token: Hire Token B, sue Earl for racism, reckless endangerment, stupidity.

Token F: Team up with Tokens I and J to seduce whoever I need to seduce in order to get Token G unbanned. Failing that:

Token H: Get off-line, attempt to remember Raptacular Haberdasher password.

Tokens I, J: See Token F

Token M: Attempt to hate hostile alt account to death.

Token N: Attempt to love hostile alt account to death.

Token O: You work that pole, gurl!

[mauve]

I wanna cast a spell. I can cast any of these level 1 spells, right?

I'm gonna cast Magic Missile.

[Geminex]

Vote: Fifthfiend

[Osterbaum]

I use 'stroke' on the stray phallus

[Shyria Dracnoir]

I search the ceiling.