Theory about Glenn Beck

[Pip Boy]

I have a theory about Glenn Beck lately. First, there are a few things we need to consider. 1) He uses eye-drops to help him cry when he wants to appear emotional talking about something. 2) He makes ridiculous claims about democrats with little or no evidence and people take his word for it. 3) He frequently makes logically flawed statements and acts as though they're somehow self-explanatory. 4) He frequently uses graphs that don't make sense, but are taken by his audience at face value.

I'm starting to think that Glenn Beck may not be republican at all. I think he might just be the world's greatest troll. I keep thinking "no, that can't be it, he's just retarded", but I cannot find any rational explanation for how a person could be this incredibly stupid and paranoid and crazy and still be functional enough to have an opinion anyone cares about.

[Osterbaum]

Not to defend Glen Beck or anything, but out of the conservative talk show/radio show etc. hosts he's actually not among the most retarded.

[Archbio]

I keep thinking "no, that can't be it, he's just retarded", but I cannot find any rational explanation for how a person could be this incredibly stupid and paranoid and crazy and still be functional enough to have an opinion anyone cares about.

Because it pays surprisingly well.

[bluestarultor]

Originally Posted by Osterbaum

Not to defend Glen Beck or anything, but out of the conservative talk show/radio show etc. hosts he's actually not among the most retarded.

This frankly scares me. If he's one of the sane ones, that means that there are absolute fucking lunatics out there. They probably fire live guns in their studios.

[Professor Smarmiarty]

Using my knowledge of Youtube conspiracy theories I have concluded that Glenn Beck is an alien timetraveller.

[Lost in Time]

Yes, but then that begs the question: From the past... or the future?!?!

[Professor Smarmiarty]

I don't think he knows anymore. He hit his head along the way and has amnesia. His craving ramblings come from psychosis as dreams of his original time drive him slowly insane.

[Fifthfiend]

Originally Posted by Pip Boy

I have a theory about Glenn Beck lately. First, there are a few things we need to consider. 1) He uses eye-drops to help him cry when he wants to appear emotional talking about something. 2) He makes ridiculous claims about democrats with little or no evidence and people take his word for it. 3) He frequently makes logically flawed statements and acts as though they're somehow self-explanatory. 4) He frequently uses graphs that don't make sense, but are taken by his audience at face value.

I'm starting to think that Glenn Beck may not be republican at all. I think he might just be the world's greatest troll. I keep thinking "no, that can't be it, he's just retarded", but I cannot find any rational explanation for how a person could be this incredibly stupid and paranoid and crazy and still be functional enough to have an opinion anyone cares about.

This assumes that the Republican Party itself is not mass-scale organized trolling.

...Or that trolling isn't entirely compatible with being incredibly dumb.

[Pip Boy]

Well, the idea behind trolling is that you're doing it just for the sake of trolling. If you piss people off by saying something you mean, then you're just dumb.

[Fifthfiend]

Originally Posted by Pip Boy

Well, the idea behind trolling is that you're doing it just for the sake of trolling. If you piss people off by saying something you mean, then you're just dumb.

And Republicans are pretty much Saying Shit We Don't Mean: The Political Party.

Glenn Beck isn't a troll, he's the political version of pro wrestling. Everyone knows it's a load of shit but they convince themselves it isn't for the sheer stupid thrill of the idiotic narrative, except that unlike wrestling fans they love it so much that they don't give a fuck about the actual real-world consequences of their gleeful stupidity. Just like Sarah Palin fans, and the tea parties, and global warming denialists, and the creationists, and the War on Terror, and everyone else up and down the line who invests themselves in self-evidently stupid narratives in violent opposition to any statement of facts or evidence, because facts and evidence are for liberal pussies, hEh.