[mo money mo problems] Tell me something UNinteresting about your job

[Terex4]

I start my day by hitting snooze on the alarm as many times as my wife requests it before she gets up to get the kids ready for school. Then I start to go back to sleep which is interrupted by our 5 year old deciding he doesn't want to go to school and my wife informing him he has to (this has been going on all year).

Once I wake up, I drive to a million different places and hope I get to snag some breakfast from one of the first three. If my wife hasn't gone to work yet, I take her in and await her text message that says "I'm bored". Then I run home and hope for at least 30 minutes of time to sit and smoke a couple cigs and drink a cold soda before the kids come home from school.

I check backpacks for homework and papers I need to sign, find out how much money the school needs this month and send the older two off to do their homework. Then if I'm not exhausted by this point I do some laundry and dishes, then I try to figure out what's for dinner. Once I find inspiration I stop to make sure its within my culinary capacity to make since I suck at cooking and get to work.

After dinner I tell the kids no to at least two or three things before they ask me for something I actually plan to give them. About an hour later I tell them to get ready for bed, make sure my eldest is actually brushing her teeth (or insurance quits paying for braces), make sure my youngest is actually doing what he's told, locating where my middle child has thrown his pants since bedtime means its "boxer time" and making sure said pants are in a tolerable place.

Then I call my mother in law to have her sit with the kids while I go get my wife from work, make sure she has something to eat, then we sit and watch tv or play video games until we go to bed where I sit up until she's asleep in case she needs anything and because my sleeping pattern is fucked six ways from sunday, then I finally fall asleep.