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Unread 02-11-2010, 10:50 PM   #501
01d55
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Default I'm not even convinced he's that slow.

Man Gregness' last update was awesome I think we can cut the guy some slack and not try and grab this thing out of his hands because he can't churn them out like this thread is a twitter feed.
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Unread 02-11-2010, 10:54 PM   #502
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Geminex slew the jabberwocky! Callooh! Callay! Geminex slew the jabberwocky! Callooh! Callay! Geminex slew the jabberwocky! Callooh! Callay! Geminex slew the jabberwocky! Callooh! Callay! Geminex slew the jabberwocky! Callooh! Callay! Geminex slew the jabberwocky! Callooh! Callay! Geminex slew the jabberwocky! Callooh! Callay! Geminex slew the jabberwocky! Callooh! Callay! Geminex slew the jabberwocky! Callooh! Callay! Geminex slew the jabberwocky! Callooh! Callay! Geminex slew the jabberwocky! Callooh! Callay!
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WE DEMAND CHURNITUDE!

Though admittedly, having seen Sibrek in action is worth the wait now. I do hope we see her again.
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Unread 02-11-2010, 10:58 PM   #503
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I'm not worried as long as we can at least get regular weekend updates. I would be posting at Gregness' speed if I was doing my overseeing right now (damn you college and your expectations that I study and learn stuff instead of playing games!).
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Unread 02-11-2010, 11:38 PM   #504
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Hey, it's midterm season. We understand. As long as it updates eventually, I'm cool with it.

Aaand as long as Queen Mauve's throne room gets ridiculously more elaborate at some point. XD
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Unread 02-12-2010, 12:46 AM   #505
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Default

It is?

*Checks my calender*
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Unread 02-12-2010, 04:22 AM   #506
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Default The Siege, Pt 2.

It's too quiet.



It's been a whole week since Sibrek routed the goblins who killed our man outside the fort. I still don't know what he was to her that his death drove her to such rage. A lover, perhaps? Sibrek won't speak to the rest of us about it.



As for the remaining siege-gang, the only group with archers is on the wrong side of the river from our gate:



We found another small team of goblins around the back of the base:



I... honestly don't know what the fuck the six of them think they're going to get done there. They can't scale the wall, they can't knock it over, and there's no fortress accesses from that side, they're on the wrong side of the river for the gate, and they're even farther from it than the other group who can't do anything.

That just leaves this group:



If they die, the rest of this pathetic little war band can amuse themselves on the skeletal goats for all I care. I don't trust that another miracle like Sibrek's will just drop into our laps, so the obvious solution is an overwhelming strike with all our troops to put them down quickly and easily. I'm not losing any more dwarves to mere goblins.

It's funny how my orders always end up being "misheard".

And by "funny" I mean "someone is having their booze privilage fucking revoked".




Apparantly these two elf-brained lunatics don't like that one of the no-names upstaged them.

Of course, they're not the only madmen in this fort. Somewhere between Sibrek proving that she was more manly than every single one of us and Melfice and Loyal's possibly terminal case of beard envy the rest of these assholes got together and elected a new mayor.



I'm not sure how or why they decided on Viridis. He hasn't been out of his room for the better part of two weeks.

Meanwhile, Melfice broke the standoff.



And began to make quick, methodical work of the goblins. In contrast to Sibrek's hewing of limbs, Melfice opted for brutally efficient stabs to vital organs:



The goblin had limped away (at the expense of a lot of blood loss) only to meet Loyal. Not content to let the chest wound take its course, Loyal put the goblin into a brutal hold and choked him out. Just as I was struck by the difference between Sibrek's rage and Loyal and Melfice's efficiency, I heard a roar.

"I AM AN ALCOHOL ELEMENTAL! AND I AM FROM THE ELEMENTAL PLANE OF BEER!!"



Every time I try to think about how Melfice managed to drink three bottles of dwarven wine while his hands were occupied with his weapons I just end up hurting my head. Regardless, the conclusion was given after that.



Though, I had no idea goblins could bleed that much.


------------------------------------------


As an aside: Loyal apparantly has a mild case of the brain damage

and yes, he had the before the fight. I'm not saying you should make jokes about Loyal being retarded, I'm just saying there's evidence.

Last edited by Gregness; 02-12-2010 at 05:32 AM. Reason: for content
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Unread 02-12-2010, 06:07 AM   #507
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Default

Ha! Win! There you have it, ladies and gentledwarfs!
Competent soldier+Goblin horde=Super Saiyan Dwarf+Goblin Horde=Much blood, screaming, flying limbs.

We need to try this again.

And it is my personal belief that Loyal has been brain-dead all along and is subsisting purely on alcohol.
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Unread 02-12-2010, 07:16 AM   #508
Melfice
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YES!
Melfice went Super Saiyan Dwarf too!

So, now I'm curious. What's the title I got? Melfice Channelmeetings the ...?
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Unread 02-12-2010, 07:30 AM   #509
Viridis
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HAHA! All hail Viridis!
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Viridis damn really gon' get stabbed
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Unread 02-12-2010, 07:35 AM   #510
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Viridis View Post
HAHA! All hail Viridis!
I shouldn't be too happy about that.
Apparently you're less of a mayor* and more of a fortress counsellor. A highly depressing job.

* Of course, given the "correct" mandates from you, you can have innocent Dwarves arrested. Must be a perk of the job.
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