Let's Conquer the World: A Let's Play of Risk!

[Geminex]

Oooorders in. Let's see what happens.

[Sage Harpuia]

Orders are sleepily placed in...

[Melfice]

Sage Harpuia, I have not yet received any orders from you.
Are you sure you sent the email to nukleargames [AT] gmail [DOT] com ?

[Sage Harpuia]

I'm pretty sure I did... I'll just PM it to you instead then. Sorry for the delay.

Edit: All is good in the world and now it's almost time to see why my title ends with ,"The Inept".

[Melfice]

Keep in mind you follow the correct title format.
It makes it easier for me to see who's sent in their orders and who hasn't. But that's okay for this time.

EDIT: I have everybody's orders in. I'm still waiting to see if something happens, though.
You know who you are.

EDIT NUEVO:
Between working like a dog, being dog-tired, feeling sick like a dog (not due to a Christmas dinner) and due to Christmas and it's dinner... I've not yet been able to do much in the way of the LP.
I DO have everybody's re-enforcements on the board, but haven't executed your orders.

Either put this poor dog out of it's miseries or forgive him for throwing up over your carpet*, but I WILL have an update up before Saturday.

*You know the one. The antique heirloom from Persia, from your favourite aunt Beatrice.
The carpet that was valued at around $100.000?

[Melfice]

State of the world after initial re-enforcements:


Empire of Zedan:

Without wasting time to take stock of their arsenal, the armies under command of Tzar Aguia the Inept marches out of their barracks in Eastern Australia to take back New Guinea from the Totally Bitchin' Land of Drgon, who stole it millennia ago from their revered ancestors.



Unfortunately, the quick departure means about half of the troops forgot to bring any weapons, and roughly three quarters of the army forgot to bring ammunition. The well entrenched four battalions of Drgons fought off the crippled Zedanians with ease, completely eliminating their four battalions.

Unphased by this heavy defeat, Aguia set his sights on Imperium of Awesome's Mongolia, hoping to capture the land that long ago spawned Ghengis Khan.



Perhaps he desires to breed a new warrior race with those genes? Who knows, but Aguia himself?
All we know is that the Zedanians coming out of China managed to defeat Supreme Overlord Hawk's troops, though not without suffering some heavy casualties. Two battalions of Awesomely Imperial troops managed to eliminate three battalions of Zedanians before succumbing to the last battalion.

With a troop movement from Western Australia to China, Aguia no doubt hopes to keep his Asian territories under his command, but might have left Australia well open to conquest.

Empire of Zedan takes Mongolia!



Grand Imperium of Luminous Destiny:

Looking south, the Lord High Regulator of All Law and Discretion Tacticslion notices the Greater Hommnyr's domination of South America. Making the decision that those poor llamas should no longer suffer under the iron fist of Chancellor Impact, Tacticslion marches his Luminous Imperialist forces south from Venezuela to Peru.



In a grand show of force, the Lord High Regulator's seven battalions completely obliterate the two battalions of Hommnyr troops without breaking a sweat, liberating thousands of llamas from slavecamps all over the land.
Bolstered by this victory, the colonel in charge of the march suggests marching on to the capital of the Hommnyr threat.



Caught unawares, Chancellor Impact can only watch as six battalions of Luminous Imperialists from Peru steamroll into Argentina. Putting up a good fight, the three Hommnyr battalions manage to take out one of Tacticslion's forces, but are ultimately defenceless against such numbers.
Capturing the Hommnyr capital will surely put a damper on the fighting spirit of this red-clad army.

Grand Imperium of Luminous Destiny takes Peru and Argentina!

Grand Imperium of Luminous Destiny captures an enemy capital!


Greater Hommnyr:

Determined to make up for his embarrasing defeat earlier, Impact orders his Brazillian troops to retake Peru.



Still heavily celebrating - and inebriating - his victory in capturing Argentina, Tacticslion forgot to place some troops back in Peru to defend against any retaliations, which cost him dearly.
The single battalion was no match for the Hommnyr regiment, being obliterated with a single move of the five Hommnyr battalions.

Not to be outdone by his enemy, the Chancellor orders the taking of Venezuela as well.



Having heard the news of the rapidly encroaching Red beast, Venezuelan Imperialists quickly threw up stone defence works. Being outnumbered, however, meant that the four Hommnyr battalions suffered as many casualties as themselves. Which is one battalion; enough to take over Venezuela from the Lord High Regulator of All Law and Discretion.

Greater Hommnyr takes Peru and Venezuela!
Greater Hommnyr recaptures those thousands of llamas!


Totally Bitchin' Land of Drgon

Being well dug in down in New Guinea, High Drgon ignores the aggression by the Empire of Zedan and, instead, sets his sights on Scandinavia.



Sending a regiment of two Russian* battalions into the woods of Finland, can High Drgon's troops shake off the bad juju from roughly 70 years ago?
The answer is a sound yes. Not expecting Russia to dare and try their luck, the Imperium of Awesome only left a single battalion to defend Scandinavia.

Totally Bitchin' Land of Drgon takes Scandinavia!

* Ukraine is named Russia on this board. Apologies for the discrepancy with the digital map...



Imperium of Awesome

Having been attacked twice already, what can Supreme Overlord Hawk do to boost the morale of his troops?

Well, for starters, he can try and conquer the African continent. Let's see how that pans out.
Sitting precariously balanced in tiny little boats, a regiment of nine Awesomely Imperial battalions sail towards Madagascar with the full intent of taking it for themselves, should there ever break out a deadly epidemic.



Occupying the coast line of the island, the Luminous Imperials put down heavy fire with their coastal cannons, taking out several hundred boats counting up to about four battalions. Five battalions sailed around Madagascar, attacking the two Luminous Imperials in the back and easily dispatching them.

Not given time to mourn the losses of their brethren, the Awesomely Imperial forces were pushed across the sea again, towards Eastern Africa. This time, luckily for them, in two heavily armoured landing craft.



As if driven by the god of war himself, the five battalions quickly made work of the regiment of Drgons.
The three battalions put up only light resistance against the flood of Imperials, but still managed to take out one battalion of the aggressors.

With those two countries conquered, Supreme Overlord Hawk looks back at a very effective first campaign, taking and unifying the entire African continent.

Imperium of Awesome takes Madagascar and Eastern Africa!
Imperium of Awesome controls Africa!

State of the world after Round 1:


Re-enforcements for Round 2 and card/reward distribution. Also, turn order for Round 2.

Greater Hommnyr: 9 territories + 3 cities /3 = 4 armies + any armies for cards traded
Imperium of Awesome: 8 territories + 3 cities /3 = 3** + 3 for Africa + 1 for capital = 7 armies + any armies for cards traded
Grand Imperium of Luminous Destiny: 7 territories + 3 cities /3 = 3 + 2 for capitals = 5 armies
Empire of Zedan: 10 territories + 3 cities /3 = 4 + 1 for capital = 5 armies + any armies for cards traded
Totally Bitchin' Land of Drgon: 8 territories + 2 cities /3 = 3 + 1 for capital = 4 armies + any armies for cards traded

** any fractions are rounded down.

All Leaders except for Tacticslion receive a card for taking over a territory! The amount of stars you have will be emailed to you to ensure secrecy.
Tacticslion receives a reward for taking over an enemy capital. You may place an airport in one of your territories!

Turn order for the next Round:


1: Greater Hommnyr
2: Empire of Zedan
3: Grand Imperium of Luminous Destiny
4: Imperium of Awesome (Re-roll: 3)
5: Totally Bitchin' Land of Drgon (Re-roll: 1)

Start sending in your next orders!

[Sage Harpuia]

Orders are sent.... well, they should be...

[The Artist Formerly Known as Hawk]

War.

Since the dawn of time, mankind has waged war. From the moment the first human took up a club and used it to beat his neighbour to steal his food and his women, men have waged war. It is the only true constant in life. It is a force of nature, a requirement for existence, the conflict that drives all things to survive, to adapt, to outdo the competition. And war... war never changes.

Except that it does. Like the beings who utilize it, it evolves. From the first club, to the first spear. To the first sword and the first bow. To the gun. The tank. The bomb, and worse. We have ever found new and more efficient ways of waging war, of killing those who appose us. And just as we have an ever increasing arsenal of weapons, so too do we have an ever increasing number of foes to use them against.

And so it has come to this, the inevitable, the great and Final War, wherein our entire species, as one being, will wage constant war, until there is only one remaining victor. And it is my honour to lead my people in this great war. When the fires of destruction roll across this world, the enemies of the Imperium of Awesome will be purged and a new order will arise. Finally, there will be... peace.

My enemies are aligned against me; to the west, the armies of the Grand Imperium of Luminous Destiny, and Greater Hommnyr, the pompous fools and the bumbling oafs. They wouldn't know a war if it smacked them in the face but even still, together they could be a threat. They will be cleansed soon enough.

To the east, the sprawling hordes of the Empire of Zedan. Already these insolent cowards have attacked me, but our brave soldiers fought to the last at heavy cost to the enemy. Revenge will be swift and decisive.

And to the north, the cretinous Bitchin' Lands of Drgon. I will not waste more ink on those vile people.

Time is short, already my enemies show their hands and begin their movement and I too must make ready. Already I have swept the lingering taint of heresy out of these lands, reclaimed this country and fortified its borders. I have begun the conscription proccess; every man from every province is being called forth, soon I will have an army with which to begin the great purge, this Final War.

They will not know what has hit them.

-Supreme Overlord Hawk

[Melfice]

Also, quick question, people.

How do you like it now that round 1 is done? (Aside from the delays. I promise I will be better about updates now...)

Do you want more pictures of the battles? The face-off and the aftermath, so to speak?
Or is this enough?
Would you like to see the dicerolls for each battle? Or do you trust me enough with the die that you'd rather not clutter up the thread with them?

Also, that's a nice blurb there, Hawk.

[Geminex]

There comes a time in every ruler's life when he must Decide. Standing at a crossroads, an uncertain future ahead of him.

I will not claim to be a good ruler, or a just ruler. I've committed my share of crimes, and more willingly, I think, than most. Blood and Flame were my watchwords, once. And when they no longer sufficed, Power and Control took their place. I am no philosopher, certainly no deep thinker.

But despite all of that, I feel Injustice. Whatever else this is, it is not right. We should not have fallen so easily, so quickly. Our capital should not have been breached, our walls broken, our troops overcome by the green surge. I feel Injustice. And I feel Rage. This will not be allowed. Power and Control served me well, but Blood and Fire have their... advantages.

And as I make this decision, pen these orders, I know there can only be one course. Blood and fire. Venegance.