Island of Maniacs 1

[Astral Harmony]

"They fished him out shortly after you must have met Colonel Ming," Luco said with a pitiful expression. "When I checked on him, he was saying to some attractive nurse that the punch you gave him came from a lecherous man accosting a woman that he tried to protect. When it comes to being low, Richard is very much the snake's belly."

"Ain't that the truth?" Saren said, joining in on the conversation. "I gave up on counting after six. Hey, Nyam. How many times has Richard hit on you."
"Fourteen, I think," Nyam looked thoughtful. "Then again, I'm not counting the times he tried to hit me up starting with light hearted humor."
"You're talking about Richard?" Lulu grinned. "He used to annoy the shit out of Tristam with the number of times he came down to ask me out. I didn't think Lord Amon created beings with a libido that insatiable."
"Two."
The other girls looked at Ezra with some surprise.
"What, Ezra?" asked Saren.
"Two times. Out of the whole trip, I think Richard has only propositioned me twice."

Lulu smirked. "But aren't you the fleet meat?"
"I guess he decided that if I wasn't going to give it to him on the first or second tries, then I wasn't worth his time." Ezra shrugged. "Go figure, y'know?"
Radian joined the group. "Look alive, everyone. The day is getting long and we're moving out with the attention to breach the Dark Nation line before the night takes over."

Rem was waiting for everyone just within the doorway that would lead inland. "Everyone, listen carefully. Now the real challenge begins. These guys won't be warming coffee or making arrows. They'll be fierce combatants employing superior strategy to kill you as quickly and as efficiently as possible. I'll find a means of using the main force with assistance from the Wellsprings as we all learn to work together. Nyam."
The vampiric catgirl saluted. "What is your command?"
"You're the scout. We're going down this road that will start going to the northeast and curve towards the center of the island, with Necrith as our ultimate destination. The Dark Nation will give you proper warning before the fight is on, so get a good view of their size and formation and then come back to report to me."
Nyam answered with words and began a high speed dash ahead of the main party. "Let's not keep her waiting. We should get moving, too."

[secretskull]

As fun as some moments had been, the battle was over far too quickly for Beladere. He hoped this Red Island place was more interesting. As luck would have it, as that thought crossed his head, Radian led in the second group, and things immediatly got a lot more interesting. "More proof that someone up there likes me."

Noticing his erstwhile assistant from the ship, decided to engage Bertz in some conversation. "You've been moving up in the world Bertz," He told him grinning. "Leader of the Azure Wellsprings." He paused, looking over the second group. "You hand picked them of course." He said grinning. "Good man. I'm sure we'll all be working very closely together."

He flashed Bertz his new-found ring. "Say, did I ever mention that I'm the former king of the Ashara Badlands?"

[Astral Harmony]

Bertz sighed. "The people picked for the group was actually Rem's idea, as well as the banding of the group to begin with. I'm fine with it, of course. I'm pretty qualified as a leader, though it pisses off my father. According to him, I should take over his job in international politics. Ugh, sometimes I see myself in his position and just do a full body shiver. Boring voices in monotone droning on and on and on. Signing my name over a thousand times a day. Trying very hard not to fall asleep even though it seems the gods have conspired to make politic meetings as dry as possible. Praise Amon I'm a soldier."

He looked over the good supply of girls added to the force. "I imagine they all meet your approval, Master Belidere," he laughed. "Unfortunately, their personalities will no doubt present capable barriers to your come ons. Saren's fiercely independant, Nyam seems to be hooked on Mister Douglas, Lulu's got a bad case of 'just doesn't get it', Radian's part horse, Akane would sooner put a crater in your chest than date you, Rem is all business and no pleasure...all in all, I'd stick with Ezra, though most people wouldn't date her because they're uncertain where she's been."

"Are you done with your chatting," Radian said with a hint of edge in her voice. "I'd really like to get going now."

-----

Intermission: A Hint of Disorder

"There, it is done."

The master healer stood up from being bent over the blonde and bloody woman on the infirmary table, wiping his sweaty brow. "Though there is nothing I can do regarding the disease that is ravaging her body. I'd say she has two weeks, two-and-a-half tops."
Viris took a long drag on her cigarette. "That's fine. You did a great job, doctor. Please, leave us and go make sure no one enters this tent."
"Yes, Your Majesty."

Once the doctor was gone, Viris turned to look at the third and final girl in the room, a blind assassin with a large scythe resting near her. "It will take a small while for her to awaken. In the meantime, I will take your full report, Alba."
The assassin nodded. "The results of the Dimentia Shroud are greater than was predicted, Your Majesty. We know little of the creatures from the war four-hundred years ago that have begun their attack on the Red Army, but our army is on the verge of total destruction, either by death, or by becoming Madsoldiers."
Viris smiled, and not a pleasant one. "I don't suppose my husband was dealt with as well."
"I am uncertain in regards to His Majesty Basscomb," Alba reported. "Early during the invasion, he abducted a number of attractive female soldiers and started a harem. He has locked himself away with much of the supplies that we had remaining, and if he is still sane, then I imagine he is waiting for the moment my older sister Ambi breaks the seal to Necrith's underground."
Viris laughed. "Muscle-bound imbecile. He could have had so much, and yet he let his two braincells form an idea of rebelling against me and acquiring the power for himself. I shall deal with him personally. Is there more?"

Alba yawned. Both she and Cherrylette who had just been healed must have been functioning on very little sleep for some time. "Yes, my Queen. King Basscomb had put my younger sister Asta in charge of dealing with the...results of your experimentation. I believe she is now lost to us."
"That's unfortunate. Asta, despite being a loose cannon with an unhealthy dose of insanity even before Red Island, was a top-notch assassin. I will try to save her the moment I am able to."
"You have my gratitude, my Queen."

Cherrylette began to stirr. Viris stood up and put out her cigarette on one of the tables. "Ming's pawns should have left by now to go find my daughter and ex-husband, if the two have managed to survive so far. Alba. After a rest you, Cherrylette and I shall go to Necrith. There's no point in me staying here any longer."
Alba stood up and saluted. "At once, my Queen."

-----

Chapter 2: "Duties of the Dark Nation"

The terrain gradually changed as the group began to seek out Princess Rosalith and Supreme Commander Shevenston. The first thing to change was the grass, from there to simply no longer there. The dirt was soft and a little moist.

"I think you told me about being the former king of the Ashara Badlands, Master Belidere." Bertz was saying. "Then again, I tend to block out a lot of things I hear. I hope you'll forgive me for that."

"No sign of Nyam yet," Saren mused. "The Dark Nation can't be too far, though."
"The Dark Nation is composed of summoned monsters," Rem explained, though it was possible everyone remembered from the last time she had talked about them. "Overlord Desphon would never put his own loyal citizens in the battle, so he created his own through sorcery."
"I must admit that I am eager to see their mettle," Radian grinned. "I haven't had a real battle is quite a while, especially against enemies I've never fought before. Definitely something to look forward to."

[Malkadocian]

The military encampment and ship he arrived on were already out of sight, when his foot stepped into a tiny puddle of mud. Not enough to sink into, but enough to put about an inch or two of his boots, that were issued to him. With a grunt of effort, Leraje pulled his foot free, and continued with the group, more annoyed then previously.

"Just tell me what and when to kill, and they'll be no problems." He glanced over to the Support Unit derisively, and clicked his tongue once, then turned to Rem. "If they're here to offer aid and the like, then who gets to give them orders? Just you? Or any of us? And what happens if you are ever... indisposed?"

[ApatheticFoxboy]

Lurking in the back, Rudy admired Rem's knack for picking group mates. She definitely deserved a second look for such a good job. The warm bodies hiking before him were striking. Without a thought, Rudy activated August Corpus and slunk to the front of the formation.

“Where ever is your lovey dovey friend, Saren? Seems she just disappeared into the jungle. You don't think she's gone feral on us, do you? She really is such lovely company.” He walked backwards facing the group, actually directly in red head's way. The nature trek energized him, he was positively skipping, twirling actually. He spun a dance he remembered from a ballroom long ago.

“Nice collar,” he said brushing her hair away from her neck, still walking backwards, “Where did you get it? I only ask because I won't picture you wearing one.” He hopped over a overgrown root cropping up in the path. Rudy was surprising agile when he was making point to be. “At least not one that didn't have my name as the owner of such a pretty pet.”

“I don't have any idea where this path ends.” That was a lie. They were heading to encounter the Dark Nation before dusk. If anyone had bothered to consult him he would have suggested after dark, but not everyone had his night sight. Of course anyone with half a brain had already figured that the road terminated at the boot of some enemy combatant. It was that so much could be between them, there just had to be a quiet clearing somewhere.

He flashed his own seashell necklace. “I would bet my last seashell necklace, you're too much of a slowpoke to pass me in a foot race.”

[Astral Harmony]

"I'll use special Rem Commands to tell the Azure Wellsprings what to do," Rem was saying to Leraje. "Unfortunately, battlefields will become too cluttered if I assign everyone to the fight. Ultimately, they'll be reserves set aside for emergency situations, only, like maybe having to deal with a second enemy formation trying to ambush us."

"Fortunately, Bertz is a surprisingly good tactician. If I ever wind up separated from the group or are otherwise unable to provide guidance, he will do his best to fill that role. Not that you should follow his instructions in full, mind you. All tacticians can do is give advice, not orders. It will fall to you, Master Leraje, and everyone else to take that advice to decide the best use of your awesome abilities based on it."

-----

Saren, being a Breaker, was definitely most vulnerable to Rudy's supernatural charms. Normally, as a friend of Nyam who Rudy had accidentally turned into a vampire, Saren would be kind of put off to Rudy. However, his charms made her attitude much softer towards him.

"Nyam's my best friend," Saren started. "She came here because she's apparently madly in love with you and cannot stand to be too far apart from you. I came here to see if I can find a cure for what you did to her. That is what you came here for, right? I read the report."

"As you can tell, I've let her drink me. Fortunately, it seems like people only turn into vampires by drinking a vampire's blood, not by having a vampire drink them. It's uncomfortable, the wound in my neck, and Nyam seems to enjoy being one of your kind, but I can't let her stay like that."

She tried to ignore his challenge and managed to somehow succeed based on simple logic. "You're a Rusher class, correct? I'm a Breaker myself, which makes me heavier and slower than you. There's no way I could win in a race against you."

-----

The route changed much during the trek. The trees eventually gave away to more dirt and the landscape began to reveal the first signs of what must have taken place four-hundred years ago. There was wreckage from unrecognizeable machines and advanced vehicles. Strange weaponry and cannons dotted the landscape beyond the large trench the group was walking through. "The first and most brutal battle of the Red War took place along the border," Rem explained. "Forbidden technology clashed with the biggest, baddest summoned monsters the Overlord could muster with his magic. It was all just to maintain a forward base that was set up on the beach. So many tens of thousands of people were killed in the battle that must have lasted weeks, maybe even months."

Saren smiled a bit. "Hey, there's Nyam."
"And there's the end of this damn trench," Radian said. "And just beyond that, there's our next victims."

Two suits of armor that clearly contained nobody inside stood between the party and the exit from the trench. Nyam stood easily within kill range of several of the enemies, but she wasn't being attacked. In fact, the enemy seemed oblivious to her existence.
"Nyam, sweetie. Part of being a good scout is not letting the enemy see you if possible." Radian chided the catgirl.
"There's no way to ambush them," Nyam reported. "The scouting parties from before were correct. The Dark Nation units will not attack unless we get too close, or attack one of them."

Here, Nyam produced something for the party. "Please observe this, everyone."

-----



-----

Rem gazed carefully at the Big Bertha some distance from the trench. "An enemy unit designed to destroy armored opponents like tanks. It will take some serious firepower to defeat that."

She checked the sprite comic and indicated the position of the two Sentient Armors. "I am certain those and the Assassin Shades outside the trench will become our first offenders. While we're busy with them, the Gastric Terrors, the Marionettes, and the Duets will come forward. We'll have to play this defensively, spliting our actions between healing and attacking. I should be able to use the Azure Wellsprings to give us the edge we need to survive the first onslaught, but even with every skill we have, this will be a very difficult fight."

Enemy Data

Sentient Armor ~ A popular summoned monster favored by sorcerers who use them to guard their workshops. They gravitate towards using large swords and beheading their opponents. Sentient Armors are best dealt with using piercing attacks or with Lightning elemental magic.

Assassin Shade ~ A sleek and agile being of darkness that uses temporarily corporeal blades to slice their victims to ribbons. They are just barely visible in the dark, making them perfect for night operations. Assassin Shades are weak against Light elemental magic.

Gastric Terror ~ A type of plant creature summoned from some netherworld. They produce an acidic and nauseous smelling fluid within a disgestive sack that they can eject at a high speed with good accuracy. Gastric Terrors fall easy prey to slashing weapons and Fire elemental damage.

Marionette ~ Wooden maidens with indistinct features suspended upon strings that don't appear to be connected to anything. They possess exceptional skill with earth magic. Marionettes are weak against slashing attacks and Fire damage.

Duet ~ The torsos, arms, and heads of two women that were pieced together and face the opposite direction from each other. The lower one that faces away is deadly with lightning magic, while the upper one that faces their foe brandishes a two-handed sword. They are weak to water magic.

Dullahan (Boss) ~ A headless horseman riding upon a horse with no face. He uses a massive lance like Radian and wields Darkness elemental magic. He's pretty fast, but isn't so great when completely surrounded. The Dullahan is weak against Light magic and piercing damage.

Big Bertha (Boss) ~ Supposedly, if Marionettes are born instead of created, these girls would be their mothers. Big Berthas are designed to defeated big, strong, heavily armored enemies with their immense strength and body-shattering fists and feet. Despite being a Breaker class, they are highly resistant to all magic, and seem to possess no weakness other than to piercing attacks.

[secretskull]

Earlier
"Barriers?" He grinned smugly. "Come now Bertz, it's nothing that couldn't be solved with a bit of creative thinking. My charming personality should win them over..." He laughed. After a moment, he lapsed into thought, murmering occasionally. "...Not technically bestiality... how bad could craters be... Extra Strenght Alcho..."

Not Quite as Early

"Don't worry about it Bertz, people seem to do that a lot..." Beladere seemed to ponder this for a moment. "You might want to try meditation Bertz. It might help." He told him helpfully.

Present Time

"So let me get this straight-" He was saying. "These summonses won't attack us until we attack them?" He began fiddling around with his ammo bag. "So... Hypothetically speaking... If a brave, handsome, and attractive Shooter was to run forward, guns blazing both literally and metaphorically. Assuming this highly skilled Shooter was to do all that, they would stand there and take it?" Beladere stood up, hefting his Rocket Launcher. "Awesome."

Taking the momentary silence for an answer, Beladere rushed forward towards the Armors. "If any god is watching!" He called up to the heavens. "I'm grateful for the targets." With that, he let off his first attack. "Gravity Well!" His Launcher, letting off a violent noise, hurled a rocket at one of the armors. The blast site would also pull any unfortunate soul that entered it to the ground. Painfully.

[ApatheticFoxboy]

Beladere’s rocket blast was Rudy’s signal flare. The missile launched over his head while Rudy sprinted under it. The volley was a mere few seconds between launch and termination. The two reckless bodies rushed the battle front. Just before the last half second when the rocket would explode in a blaze of fire and gravity magic, Rudy had the burst pass the rockets path to the other side of the sentient armor. The armor took the hit and the force of the blast blew him on his ass out of the Gravity Well.

Rudy looked behind him to see the moving armor moving slowly, they labored under the magic enhanced weight of their bodies. The spirited shooter had hit his target. The torso was obliterated but still standing on it’s two legs, not that it was going anywhere. It fell with it’s own weight. Outside the blast radius, the kicked up dirt swirled around before settling. Inside, everything was pulled to the ground and seemed flat.

The Well put a solid obstacle between Rudy and those behind it. The Duets rose from their dormant state. The two double women responded to the vampire’s presence, brandishing their weapons and charging their magic. Nonchalant, the vampire stood up looked at them, the sword wielding one on the right and said, “Hey can I get your opinion on something?” He covertly activated Charm. She paused her attack if only for a moment to listen.

“Let‘s say you met twin brothers. Physically, mentally identical. One is richer and powerful than the queen Viris herself. He commands legions of warriors, and controls the heavens. The other one romances you better than any suitor before. He is the most masterful lover you‘ve ever had, and makes you scream to the heavens” At this point he had caught the attention of both double women, but since her partner wasn’t attacking either was she.

“Which would you chose? And just so you know I‘m more the latter myself”

[Astral Harmony]

"They...just...don't...listen!" the Dullahan growled, then directed his lance at Rem. "Attack, Dark Nation! Do not let a single one of them through!"

Beladere's Gravity Well Rocket utterly destroyed the primary target. The second Sentient Armor sunk his blade deep in the dirt in order to keep his footing and position, then kicked off of it to land on top of the southern dirt cliff near the Assassin Shade.

Beladere's Gravity Well had some major effects. A good portion of the northern dirt cliff collapsed into a steep climb that now anyone could climb. The northern Assassin Shade was sucked down. The northern Gastric Terror and Marionette were protected from the effects of the spell by use of their rooted and strung up principles, somehow.

Rudy's vampiric powers...had a strange effect on the two Duets, probably because of their magical nature. They were...doing that Caramelldansen dance, and despite the fact that they basically used the hands of a woman as feet and wielded a good-sized sword, they were damn good at it. All of the remaining enemies were converging on Rudy, spells and attacks charging. Radian managed to silence the northern Gastric Terror by Launching her giant lance, but one Gastric Terror, two Marionettes, and the remaining Assassin Shade were about the put the hurt on Rudy.

Even the Big Bertha was moving with him sighted as the first thing she would squish...until her head suddenly disappeared. The Dullahan turned sharply to see a sleek, sexy pink mecha, roughly twenty-five feet in height with a smoking armcannon and the name "Veronica" painted on the right leg. "Am I late for the party?"

"Who the hell is that!?" Radian demanded, getting ready to Launch her handaxe because Beladere's Gravity Well kept her from advancing forward or exiting the trench.
"Long story, I'll tell you later," Rem promised. "Right now, Rudy's in the some pretty deep shit."

The remaining Sentient Armor quickly summons a new sword for itself and gets ready to advance on Rudy.

SITREP Report: One Sentient Armor, one Assassin Shade, one Gastric Terror, and the Big Bertha are all destroyed.

Rudy is attacked and wounded by the Assassin Shade and Gastric Terror that remain. Rudy is currently being targeted by the southern Marionette charging her Gaian Crush spell. She needing time to charge the spell is about the only reason Rudy isn't in critical condition just yet. The northern Marionette, left all by itself, is targeting the pink mecha.

Rudy is notably injured but still able to maintain his Charm on the Duets. The only sources of healing are the Gastric Terrors and Duets (the only two enemy types that have blood) and his own allies on the other side of Beladere's Gravity Well. He can also sense a blood lifeform within the confines of that pink mecha, but that's the most impossible-to-reach source of blood anyone could ask for.

The Dullahan is now engaging the pink mecha. Good luck with that, buddy.

"Douglas, please use your turn to break concentration and circle around the north to the other side of Beladere's Gravity Well. And try not to drink anyone once you get here. We may all need our blood. Forcers, target the remaining Assassin Shade and Sentient Armor, probably the only two enemies that could chase Rudy to safety. Everyone else, draw back. We can use that well to keep the Duets from counterattacking anytime soon and we can deal with the rest of them piece by piece. Once the Sentient Armor, Assassin Shade, and Marionette targeting Rudy are all dead, Beladere drops the well and we smash the Duets, finally assisting our little friend in the TISMA with that Dullahan."

"TISMA?" Radian echoed. "Rem, do you know what the hell that thing is?"
"Yes, and I have a pretty good idea who's piloting it," Rem answered. "We'll do introductions later. Right now, I need that vampire out of danger. Nyam, I'm about to issue a Rem Command. Get ready."
Nyam clashed her metal claws together and purred with anticipation.

[ApatheticFoxboy]

Rudy could only tilt his head to the side. Instead of answering to his question, The Duets started dancing the Caramelldansen around each other. Rudy was quite fascinated with these double women performing before him and applauded. This major distraction cost Rudy though. From his uncovered flank, the slick Assassin Shade materialized a blade from its personal darkness. When Rudy heard the faint slash of air, a alarm rang out in Rudy’s head, and he lunged away only to have his back and shoulder sliced.

The second hit came from the Gastric Terror on the ridge. A patch of nauseous, potentially acidic fluid arched from the Gastric Terror’s stomach, and splattered across the cut in Rudy’s jacket. The digestive fluid ate at the vampire’s pale skin. The aggravated flesh burned and did not mend quickly. Beaten, Rudy took Rem’s direction in all seriousness. He activated Dishearten to prevent farther attacks and ran north. His hyperactive senses probed the air for the smell of blood.

He saw the northern Gastric Terror Radian had run through. The lance lodged in it plugged up the slowly leaking blood. He licked his fangs in anticipation. The northern Marionette had turned its back on its fallen comrade. Rudy saw his opportunity and quickly ran to it, pick up the end of Radian’s lance. He wasn’t quite strong enough it lift it, so Rudy proceeded to drag it behind him, Gastric Terror in tow, back around Beladere‘s Gravity Well.

When he got back safety behind the Well, he dislodged his meal from the lance, and sunk his fangs into it. He handed Radian her lost weapon. “I got your lance back for you. You can thank me later.”