"Hurtful Everyday Language And Common Vernacular" or "Retarded, N-Word"

[pochercoaster]

I also don't see the point in saying, "We can use it, but you can't," because I feel it runs counterproductive to the result you want to see. Which is, "People not using them at all." Saying something is alright for one set of people to do, but not another is completely hypocritical.

White people want everything, including the right to use hurtful language.

Like, I've never desired the right to use racial slurs, and I don't understand white people who want to. It's like they're saying "Heh, I can say that too! I can do anything! Neener!" Of things that I can't do, I'm pretty okay with not using racial slurs, and you should be too. Is this the hill you want to die on? Do you really wanna be that guy?

Also, faggot comes from the fact that homosexuals used to be burned at the stake, along with "witches."

Edit: And retard is used perjoratively in everyday language, so yeah it's a pretty shitty thing to call someone if you've ever observed how mentally disabled people are treated like they're subhuman 99% of the time.

Edit 2: Also, I'm just going to leave some posts from RacismSchool here. Post 1. Post 2.

Edit 3:

Just like faggot was a pile of sticks and nigger was meant to mean 'ignorant person'.

Seriously read this.

[Kim]

Saying something is alright for one set of people to do, but not another is completely hypocritical.

Aside from other stuff that's been said by people better than I ever could I just wanna touch on this.

An important part of language is CONTEXT. This is often meant in terms of the particular sentence or such, but also applies to who is saying what. A het guy calling someone else a faggot is a completely different context than a gay guy using it for himself, or using it for other gay guys who are comfortable with it.

To claim that's hypocritical is to deny that context is an important part of language. Which would be an ignorant thing to do.

EDIT: Also, like, calling myself a slut? That feels fucking POWERFUL. It's like, "Hell yeah I like sex! I'm gonna do a million sex! Whoo!" Someone else calling me a slut? That's a completely different feeling. Sometimes I like that feeling, when I want someone I'm close to to degrade me but it's not something to just be thrown around all willy nilly. Calling myself a dyke also feels fucking powerful cuz it's like "YEAH I'M LESBIAN AS HELL AND YOU CAN'T STOP ME NOBODY CAN STOP ME" which is a good feeling cuz there are people who say I don't get to be a lesbian cuz of being trans.

[pochercoaster]

To build upon Kim's post: (Ninja'd by it, actually)

I abhor the word slut when used as an insult. Like 99% of women, I have been called a slut (and a whore) for things as innocuous as walking to the grocery store in a skirt. When used as an insult, it's deeply hurtful. And when you examine what the word means, all it's designed to do is hurt women for merely having sexuality. Because the word is so arbitrarily applied- people call women sluts no matter if they're virginal, sexually active with one partner, or promiscuous- you see it's just meant to be a catch-all term for hurting women. Furthermore, a woman having consensual sex is not anything that should be considered worthy of disdain.

However, sometimes women may apply the word to themselves, as a way of embracing their own sexuality, because why should a woman be ashamed of her sexuality? Why not even be proud of who you are, when you were raised to be ashamed of your body and your sexuality? In this context, slut is not an insult. However, using the word slut in this context is not something that you can force upon anyone- it's something someone chooses for themselves. So, you can't just throw this word around and say it doesn't hurt anyone because some women reclaimed the word for themselves.

And, like, I can't talk about racial slurs cause I'm not equipped to, and I don't want to say it's the same thing as gendered slurs, but I kind of view racial slurs similarly: you can use them if they apply to you. If they don't apply to you, stay the hell away from them, because you're just gonna end up hurting someone, and making an ass of yourself.

[Aerozord]

Everyone can say anything. I am very much anti-censorship. Words are not taboo nor are they inherently hurtful. Language is evolving and what offends or is meant to offend changes over time. You cannot control language nor should you. Ban a word and new ones will be created to take its place, because if they want to insult someone they will find a way. If you personally feel certain words should not be said it is a personal choice. Language will change because people no longer wish to use a word, not because you forcibly regulate it. If anything that will maintain it in the lexicon the same way swear words are preserved specifically because they are taboo

I do not get mad at someone for using a word, I get mad at a person trying to hurt or belittle another human being.

[pochercoaster]

So, where is the censorship and forcible regulation of these words? It's not illegal to say a racial slur. Criticizing someone because they use racial slurs is NOT the same as censorship. It's free speech in response to free speech. If you don't wanna be criticized for insulting people then don't insult people.

I do not get mad at someone for using a word, I get mad at a person trying to hurt or belittle another human being.

This is exactly what slurs are supposed to do. If you think it's not I dare you to go around calling people slurs IRL. (Please don't actually do that.) See how long that lasts for you.

[Kim]

Being asked to maintain a basic level of respect by not saying hurtful slurs is not censorship.

Maybe you haven't gotten a bunch of hateful messages calling you a faggot who deserves to be murdered in the street Aero. And if you have you haven't gotten them specifically for your queerness. Maybe you haven't had people calling you an ugly tranny. And if you did, it can't have remotely hurt as much because you're not trans.

You don't have to regularly deal with people throwing around words they think are Oh So Fun To Use that are words that specifically exist to hurt You because of your gender or sexuality. And if you don't see how people who have experienced that feel actual pain seeing them thrown around casually by the same sorts of people who use those words to hurt them, then you are lacking a very basic level of human empathy.

And that's fucking tragic.

[Aerozord]

If a word hurts you than be upset. I am saying intent is what matters. Retarded wasn't originally an insult, it was just a medical term. Gay used to mean "happy". White trash used to be a horribly offensive term.

If someone means no harm when they say a word I see no reason in getting upset at them. Though I don't get mad at people hurting me on accident. Might not be happy about it, but it only upsets me when people mean harm.

[Kim]

It's not on accident when you know those words hurt and you choose to keep using them because "Well I didn't mean faggot that way." It is the very opposite of accident. You know those words hurt. You still use those words by deliberate choice. You have literally chosen to hurt someone by doing so.

If someone SEES YOUR FOOT THERE and chooses to step there such that THEY STEP ON YOUR FOOT because they just REALLY WANTED TO STAND THERE are you really going to call it an accident, no biggy, you didn't mean to step on my foot you just decided to step on my foot.

[Marc v4.0]

Yeah, Aerodude, someone getting upset because you dropped the N word or called someone a slur, or asking that you not use those words because they are hurtful or insulting is not censorship. They are not a government, media or authoritative body suppressing your speech under threat of duress.

[Aerozord]

Originally Posted by Kim

It's not on accident when you know those words hurt and you choose to keep using them because "Well I didn't mean faggot that way." It is the very opposite of accident. You know those words hurt. You still use those words by deliberate choice. You have literally chosen to hurt someone by doing so.

This is why I personally do not use such words. Though I have seen people use words for sarcasm or even terms of endearment. A much milder form. A friend does something silly and you call him an idiot. That word is insulting of course, it implies a lack of intelligence. However it was not meant to convey malice but if anything to bolster the humor of your friends action.

Your own example, as was stated, means "a small bundle of sticks" it is only insulting because people put a negative meaning behind that word. Again, gay meant "happy" the opposite of an insult but many use it like one. Opposite end, while not so common anymore people using "bad" to mean good. Its whats behind the words, not the words.