The Official Tinfoil Hat Conspiracy Theorists of NPF!

[RobinStarwing]

We invite you all to state anything crazy enough that it will get you a tinfoil hat. Just remember to specify what kind!

*holds up his tinfoil staff and puts on his tinfoil wizard's hat* We already know I am bouncing between Ice Age Civilizations and Ancient Alien theories and that they are being covered up by the world governments. That's my brand of crazy.

EDIT: I am also going to add that I believe Michelle Bachmann is an alien that sucks peoples brains out through her eyes.

EDIT2: Would it help to point out that this is just for fun and no one here (I hope) believes the crazy stuff they will spout?

[CABAL49]

Everyone is all about this Jewish conspiracy and that Jewish conspiracy. The Zionist movement is all a lie perpetrated by the real secret society. You see, if they make up conspiracies, they can hide while the regular fools go around on their wild goose chases.

So who are the real villains? They are looking right at you right now! It's the aristocracy man! These people use sex and money to keep the masses ignorant and weak. This way they can do their experiments in secret. They are breeding people.

Not just any people though. Their own brand of supermen. I got to go now. I think they are looking at me.

[Aldurin]

All of the Admins are really Brian himself.

[Flarecobra]

Bill Nye is really an evil scientist who attempted to brainwash an entire generation into doing his deeds.

Oh, and you know those random helicopters you see flying around? That's me!

[Bard The 5th LW]

I actually rule the world and mislead the uninformed masses with my false psychosis. The ruse is so strong even I am not sure of the truth.

[Kyanbu The Legend]

All of the world's animals are really plotting to take over the world. Those zoos you people go to, yeah... those are secret bases in disguise where they develop super weapons designed to over through mankind.

And the insects. They are really super nanites designed to kill us all. KILL. US. ALL!


Just look at the Japanese Giant Hornet. It's just pure ultimate evil. The pinnacle of their research! They are already attacking Japan. Soon the rest of the world will be at their feet.

WE. ARE. ALL. GOING. TO. DIE!

[The SSB Intern]

John Kerry is putting all of our beloved African American actors into dresses.

[Intern Nin]

The moon landing video was a fake, it was actually footage from the top secret mission to Pluto where they harvested vital materials from it's core, which were later used in the manufacturing of earthquake machines and novelty car horns. The loss of it's core caused Pluto to implode and shrink, thus making it too small to be considered a planet.

Paul McCartney is not dead, but he is not living either. He is one of the most high profile undead entities in the history of the music industry.

The Skull and Bones Society is actually a front for a much more insidious organization, whose prerogative is the upkeep and maintenance of a massive underground radio tower, that has since ancient times been sending out waves which scrambles the part of the human brain that would allow you to hear the humpback whales' telepathic messages. The order receives most its funding from the sale of shamwows and other such television advertised novelties.

Lee Harvey Oswald was not at the top of book repository building to shoot Kennedy, he was using that vantage point to snipe the gunmen #1-3 on the grassy knoll and gunman #4 on a Coca-Cola billboard. The locations of these assailants was given to him by his comic book artist friend, who himself received the information from an ancient bat-god.

[Shyria Dracnoir]

Millions of years ago, an alien ship crash landed in what would later be known as Australia. To conceal themselves from the locals, the aliens retreated deep underground and began modifying the wildlife and climate to create an environment so inhospitable that even a complete idiot would take one look at it and immediately go home, buying them some time to repair their ship while using Earth as a research outpost.

In response, mankind created an even more complete idiot. The aliens refuse to reveal themselves to this day out of sheer embarrassment.

[Thadius]

Spontaneous combustion is a total myth. The human body cannot get warm enough on its own to randomly burst into flames. No, you can thank one of NASA's secret projects for that. Some moron had the bright idea to put a giant magnifying glass into space so that he could see all the stars clearer. Problem being, when it gets in between the Earth and the Sun, somebody is going to fry. Of course, it's very hard to tell when it is and isn't safe to go out...