Corrupted Wishes

[bluestarultor]

Originally Posted by The Gunslinger

Granted. You gain control of Scientology too and get busted by the IRS and sent to prison for life.

I wish Will Smith was in every movie ever.

Granted, but he also plays all roles, which gets a bit awkward in some cases. Also, it turns out he can't hold up the industry on his own, so it begins to collapse. In over his head propping up a failing industry, he takes a dive off a bridge. His likeness is then reproduced digitally as the film industry tries to compensate, but eventually, all films are destroyed as the masses revolt. A century of history, gone. TV is then banned from doing anything but reality shows lest anything gain enough popularity to be put on DVD or actually deserve a movie. Viewership plummets, taking down another industry. Video games are banned from including cutscenes, as well, as they're "in-game movies." All that's left are casual games, simple platformers, and other retro fare, and games fizzle out, too. All that's left is radio and printed material, but the radio industry has forgotten how to do anything but music and public access, and its attempts to ape the radio shows of old are met with popular failure. Trying to fill the niche results in that industry falling as well.

I hear you asking, "What of the Internet?" Oh, my poor, deluded friend. YouTube went down for violation of the Anti-Movie Act right at the beginning, but other sites cropped up. It was determined all motion media was to be removed from all browsers, including animated GIFs and Flash, under the technicality of the use of the word "movie" when describing the latter. With no banner ads, the Internet slowly died as server costs overwhelmed sites one by one. It's now used solely for informational purposes by the governments and best-funded organizations of the world.

Enjoy your reading.



Edit: Crap, ninja'd.

Originally Posted by Hawk

Granted, Will Smith is now in every movie ever. It's only later that you realise what a terrible, terrible mistake that was.

I wish my internet connection would stop dying in the middle of my videogames.

You now have no Internet connection.


I wish I didn't scare myself with how good I am at this.

[akaSM]

Originally Posted by bluestarultor

I wish I didn't scare myself with how good I am at this.

Granted, now you're not scared of yourself anymore since you're insane.

I wish I don't get ninja'd in this thread again

[Thadius]

Granted! Your mind has now been wiped, leaving you with no reason to fear! It also leaves you with nothing at all, but hey, no fear.

Umm, lemme think...

I wish to be immune to caffeine withdrawal headaches.

[Bard The 5th LW]

Granted. You begin to ninja everyone else. In every thread. We all hate you now. Well, we hate you more.

I wish I was dead. ):

[akaSM]

Wait, I still got ninda'd, how will the wish work? O_o

Originally Posted by Thadius

Granted! Your mind has now been wiped, leaving you with no reason to fear! It also leaves you with nothing at all, but hey, no fear.

Umm, lemme think...

I wish to be immune to caffeine withdrawal headaches.

Granted, caffeine won't get you withdrawal headaches anymore, too bad everything else gives you withdrawal headaches now

Originally Posted by BardTheFifthLightWarrior

Granted. You begin to ninja everyone else. In every thread. We all hate you now. Well, we hate you more.

I wish I was dead. ):

more? o_o

Granted, you're dead now, but science finds a way to keep your consciousness "alive" and uploads it to...what was it called around here? "the discovery channel"?

I wish I could win THE GAME

[The Artist Formerly Known as Hawk]

Congratulations, you have just won THE GAME. Unfortunately you can only ever win it the once and the prize money is a meager £1.10, or your comparative local currency.


I wish this wish goes ungranted. Ha, chew on that one fuckers!

[The Sevenshot Kid]

You're wish is ungranted! The universe implodes.

I wish that the United States won the World Cup.

[Wigmund]

Granted, unfortunately no one in the US gave a damn.

I wish that mankind would start colonizing other planets and spread across the stars.

[Osterbaum]

You really don't. But it does anyway and you soon realize you should've just gotten a Wii instead.

I wish I could turn into a wolf and back to a human whenever I wanted to.

[BitVyper]

Granted! You assume your mighty wolf form for the first time, but unfortunately, because the size and shape of your brain have to change, you forget how to change back. You also don't know how to be a wolf and have no experience making the body work, and now lack the brain power to think about it very rationally.

Granted...kinda...sorta. because you didn't make a wish in the first place it wasn't corrupted.

How ironic.

I wish to immediately achieve enlightenment in every possible positive sense of the word.